Why do things Cost Money?
So I wrote this whole entry and LJ erased it because LJ is a cunt so this one will be faster and maybe shittier. Blame LJ.
Anyway, I was supposed to get a federal tax return this year, but I didn't, even though they promised if I made monthly payments on my student loan debt then I would get it out of default status and they wouldn't take my return this year (lying liarfaces that they are). So I only got a State return this year, and it all went to pay bills and buy medicine (ok, yes, I DID buy a Kindle as well, but I got it from work so it was with my employee discount and a $26 off coupon, so it was only $60 and I got a bunch of free books I wouldn't have otherwise been able to afford). The problem is, my computer is held together with duct tape and prayers, and I was going to buy a new one with my federal return (lol nope) but I couldn't, so now I'm going to try and save the money to buy a new one. A Chromebook will run me about $230 or so on amazon, and the sad fact of my life is that $230 seems insurmountable with my current situation, but I'm really going to try and have enough money by July (hahaha good luck) or by October if July doesn't work out. I don't have a bank account so I'll just be stuffing money in my secret hiding space to stash it away, which cracks me up.
I was hoping for love and support and prayers /good thoughts if y'all could send them my way. Yes I realize there are starving children in the world, and asking you to pray I get a computer sounds horribly selfish in comparison, but I use my computer to complete surveys and also to write and submit articles from time to time, which is really the only thing keeping my head above water financially right now, so it is a necessity, plus I encourage you to pray/send good thoughts to the starving children FIRST and then send me any you can spare afterward.
TMI TMI STOP READING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
Also I haven't known how to say this, so I'm just going to infodump it here. My pain in the ass TMI situation is worse than we thought. It turns out I have a bunch of hemmhroids surrounding a big lump of indeterminate origin, and it might be cancer (or a cyst, or Bad Milo growing in my ass, who knows) so the point is it will take a surgery to find out what it is, and more surgery to get whatever it is and its hemmhroid-y friends too, so if y'all could send good thoughts, pray, whatever, I would appreciate it. Sigh. Books and the hope for a shiny new computer are really helping me keep going right now, srsly.
I love you all. Thank you for listening.