Tis the Tues before Christmas
Well talking with Chris last eemed extremely hopefull. I didnt think that him acknowledging treatment was going to be a successfull as it has been. No that I dont doubt hisd ability to make sound and honest decisions, its just that the one thing that I hoped (and I use this term wisely here) is that he realize that he needs to make some changes and that his options to do so are few.
As far as these optios go here is what he came up with. He felt that going into the Coast Guard was going to be the best thing for him. As I felt sad about him leaving and going somewhere that would put many miles between us, I felt extremely happy that he was willing to take some steps here (1) to realize that he had to change (2) that this decision to change was dirrectly his choice. Yea there were factors at play here that were encouraging hime to make these decisions, but making the change for the better was his choice.
We talked about this andf told him on the surface i wanted to keep him close to me (how selfish) but deep down I wanted him to make the choice, and that if we were going to be together it would be in gods hands. I told him i would stand by him, and encourage him all along the way. He was happy to hear this, and i thought it settle his concerns that it would make me sad. Actually it made me happier (not thinking for myself) but feeling that this was the choice that he made and this actually made me happy. Wow I am really maturing into a quality individual. There would have been a time that i would have conived my way into figuring out a way that would suite my needs, this time my needs were suited (by chris getting help and making the choice himself) and this show me that unlimately when you really love someone you must let them go, however, we all know that if they come back, then its truly meant to be.
Well we got off the phone at this point and I went home to my meeting. After my meeting (shorter then usual) I called him back and wanted to know how his pondering went. Well it completly change the degree that what he was about to do. I guess the Coast Guard at this point was no longer an option. He had decided that going into a long term treatment program was what was best, and that he was happy to do this. This is a remarkable step he was able to take and to not be upset or extremely dissappointed about the let down just shows how strong of a soul he really has. This just makes him that much more attractive to me. I cant explain the joy i am able to recieve from this experience, being able to share this kind of moment with someone I really care about and see him make a step to not only make his life better, but the life of all those who love him as well.
We talked about fate, and from what I can see as our situation together, fate may play a roll in us, and we will have to see what happens. I did tell him that I was content supporting him, and waiting for him through what could be considered the most significant step he has ever taken to make his life all it can be. I am so happy for him....
As far as these optios go here is what he came up with. He felt that going into the Coast Guard was going to be the best thing for him. As I felt sad about him leaving and going somewhere that would put many miles between us, I felt extremely happy that he was willing to take some steps here (1) to realize that he had to change (2) that this decision to change was dirrectly his choice. Yea there were factors at play here that were encouraging hime to make these decisions, but making the change for the better was his choice.
We talked about this andf told him on the surface i wanted to keep him close to me (how selfish) but deep down I wanted him to make the choice, and that if we were going to be together it would be in gods hands. I told him i would stand by him, and encourage him all along the way. He was happy to hear this, and i thought it settle his concerns that it would make me sad. Actually it made me happier (not thinking for myself) but feeling that this was the choice that he made and this actually made me happy. Wow I am really maturing into a quality individual. There would have been a time that i would have conived my way into figuring out a way that would suite my needs, this time my needs were suited (by chris getting help and making the choice himself) and this show me that unlimately when you really love someone you must let them go, however, we all know that if they come back, then its truly meant to be.
Well we got off the phone at this point and I went home to my meeting. After my meeting (shorter then usual) I called him back and wanted to know how his pondering went. Well it completly change the degree that what he was about to do. I guess the Coast Guard at this point was no longer an option. He had decided that going into a long term treatment program was what was best, and that he was happy to do this. This is a remarkable step he was able to take and to not be upset or extremely dissappointed about the let down just shows how strong of a soul he really has. This just makes him that much more attractive to me. I cant explain the joy i am able to recieve from this experience, being able to share this kind of moment with someone I really care about and see him make a step to not only make his life better, but the life of all those who love him as well.
We talked about fate, and from what I can see as our situation together, fate may play a roll in us, and we will have to see what happens. I did tell him that I was content supporting him, and waiting for him through what could be considered the most significant step he has ever taken to make his life all it can be. I am so happy for him....