Regrets
- I have this huge regret that I didn't get off of my maternity leave butt and apply for the glass rep job that Melissa does. I know my dissatisfaction with my current position has caused attendance problems and now that locks me into this role until August. It makes me sad!!
- That I have my niece effectively raising my child for me. They share a room, she feeds him and plays with him while I'm gone and he even calls her Lala. I just feel like a worthless mom because I don't get as much Mommy/baby time as I'd like. Raar!
- That I didn't focus more on school. I came to Arizona to go to ASU and I wound up getting pregnant and abandoning that. Now, I am focused on getting a child raised and a home paid for so I can't do that without sacrificing more time with Holden.
I am also getting increasingly frustrated with life overall. I'm not sure why, but I find myself getting rather intense bursts of anger that I just bottle up and move on about. I have no idea what is making me so mad, but I feel like I take it out on Mingo a lot and that isn't fair. He does semi treat me like a slave and that gets me upset, but I've been calling him on it lately, so he's trying to be better about it. (In clarification, I mean that he makes me his gopher/ cook/ servant in the way of "Honey, can you do this?" or "Honey can you get me..." or "Honey will you make me...") It frustrates me more when it's something that has nothing to do with me. Like "Honey will you go buy me cigarettes?", that gets me because it's my time, my effort for him completely. I had to go shopping the other day for 4 hours because he was mad at Heather and wanted me to take her somewhere. I don't know about you, but I don't like going out right when I get off work. I want to relax and get the day off my back. I think I need to get a prescription for Ambien or something so I can sleep more soundly and feel less agitated during the day. Maybe I'll call my doctor. Hope all is well with all of you!
- That I have my niece effectively raising my child for me. They share a room, she feeds him and plays with him while I'm gone and he even calls her Lala. I just feel like a worthless mom because I don't get as much Mommy/baby time as I'd like. Raar!
- That I didn't focus more on school. I came to Arizona to go to ASU and I wound up getting pregnant and abandoning that. Now, I am focused on getting a child raised and a home paid for so I can't do that without sacrificing more time with Holden.
I am also getting increasingly frustrated with life overall. I'm not sure why, but I find myself getting rather intense bursts of anger that I just bottle up and move on about. I have no idea what is making me so mad, but I feel like I take it out on Mingo a lot and that isn't fair. He does semi treat me like a slave and that gets me upset, but I've been calling him on it lately, so he's trying to be better about it. (In clarification, I mean that he makes me his gopher/ cook/ servant in the way of "Honey, can you do this?" or "Honey can you get me..." or "Honey will you make me...") It frustrates me more when it's something that has nothing to do with me. Like "Honey will you go buy me cigarettes?", that gets me because it's my time, my effort for him completely. I had to go shopping the other day for 4 hours because he was mad at Heather and wanted me to take her somewhere. I don't know about you, but I don't like going out right when I get off work. I want to relax and get the day off my back. I think I need to get a prescription for Ambien or something so I can sleep more soundly and feel less agitated during the day. Maybe I'll call my doctor. Hope all is well with all of you!