GASPERS
Abbe: so does emily know how big HER family's turkey is?
Abbe: i bet it's not 34 poundssssss
Abbe: (starting a ring of turkey envy you know. everyoen's gotta have a bigger turkey. *nod* otherwise your sex life will be ru- oh wait, wrong thing. ummmmmmm ahhhhh yeah ignore that.)
Emily: LMFAOOO!!!!!
Emily: "did you hear about that girl? yea. she said her turkey was 34 lbs. but we all know it was fake. implants. im so serious. no MY turkey was 57.97 lbs. yea, i know...."
Abbe: LMFAO
Abbe: i bet she fed that turkey viagrow.
Abbe: the cheater.
Emily: filthy whore!!!!
Abbe: *shakes head* i mean look at this, all this spam i'm getting because of it. "increase your drumsticks" AHA YEAH RIGHT. "bigger breasts", "larger stuffing cavity" ...jeez, will it never end?!
Emily: LMFAOOOOOOOOO
Emily: this turkey envy has GOT to stop
Abbe: and just think of all the freaks who walk around trying to guess every guy's turkey size. jesus.
Abbe: YOU SHOULDN'T DISCRIMINATE AGAINST A GUY JUST BECAUSE HE COULDN'T AFFORD TO SHELL OUT $100 FOR THE BIGGEST TURKEY IN THE STORE!
Abbe: AND MAYBE HIS FAMILY DOESN'T EAT THAT MUCH ANYWAY!
Emily: I KNOW!!!!
Emily: what about the vegetarians???
Abbe: it's so sad
Emily: is there no love and support for them and their veggie turkies????
Abbe: apparently they're all impoturkey this year.
Emily: and also: the steroid use!!!!!!! its madness!!!
Abbe: oh i know!!!
Abbe: but it's like, what are they going to do? break into everyone's homes and kidnap the people who are eating turkeys grown with steroids?
Emily: i dont know. its the world we live in abbe.
Emily: filled with ENHANCED turkeys.
Abbe: *shakes head*
Abbe: as though every woman is going to have so much less pleasure serving her family with a smaller turkey.
Emily: i personally dont want to live in a world where a turkey has to be the size of a small minivan in order to acchieve happiness.
Abbe: i mean, as long as it DOES the job, who cares? all everyone needs is just one bite of turkey, really.
Emily: and a bit of pie and BOOM: all done.
Abbe: exactly!
Abbe: ...well, and some stuffing, but that just kind of goes without saying.
and *omg* three blogs within like. three hours. it's crazy i tell you! (that and i'm bored and don't feel like writing. *is procrastinating*)
...ta <3