When your mother and father bring home a four hour-old baby and announce that she is going to stay, make sure the baby knows her place by only referring to her as it, as in "I want to hold it".  You can also try telling the baby's great-grandmother to "keep it" and see if that works.

When all of a sudden you have to share your mother's breasts, and ( Read more... )

1. When your dear mother decides to take you to the local Italian eatery with dad because she's tired of cooking and doing dishes, don't say anything when she makes you wear a gorgeous ivory and french blue blouse for which she paid a fortune.  Then make sure that you thoroughly enjoy your spaghetti.  This will teach her to:
a) Never forget to pack ( Read more... )

Notes form Abigael:

1.  It is important on road trips to occasionally remind your parents that they are cruel for tying you up in a contraption and expect you to sit there quietly for hours, regardless of how exciting the destination might be.  A good way to remind them of this is by requesting something special, something delicious, something you ( Read more... )

Yesterday I removed the "partial airway obstruction" from my wee daughter's throat. I have never heard a cough/wheeze like that in my life. I should amend that and say I am sure I probably have heard a cough like that but it never made the world stop for me like it did at the library yesterday, when we went from nursing happily to banging on baby ( Read more... )

Yesterday, Abigael and I went to "Aquatots" for the second time. It is a wonderful, wonderful thing. I like the other moms there, and the facilitator is amazing. She is really animated, but in a gentle way, knows all the babies' names, and is a really positive person. Yesterday's class included a lesson on how to clear partially blocked airways ( Read more... )

It's snowing. Actually, it's doing that half snow, half rain thing. But I woke up to some big white fluffy flakes out my window. Fantastic ( Read more... )

Forgive me father, it has been a while since my last shower. I'm talking days, people ( Read more... )