It's About Time We Infected Them
Last week I performed three times which is the most I've done in one week so far. It was pretty fun.
On tuesday I performed at the Kino Cafe on Cambie. I did alright. The MC there only lets people do 3 minutes unless he's seen them before and he knows they are good. Then he'll give them 5 to 7 minutes. I actually did stand-up there before but he went to the bathroom during my 3 minutes. It was probably a good thing though because last time I didn't do too well. This time I did do well though but he was outside talking to some other comedian at the time... so I guess next time I'll only have 3 minutes again.
On wednesday I performed at the Press-Box on Hastings. That was not the greatest. I did all new stuff and didn't really get the audience's attention. Another comedian got a video of me and the only reason it's funny is because after every joke the only laugh you can hear is the guy holding the camera.
On thursday I went to Zawa's on Commercial Drive. I went there the week before to ask the MC if I could have a spot for the coming week and he said okay and I stayed to watch the rest of the show. Then randomly without telling me, during the show he says, "This next guy is brand new. I just met him tonight. He doesn't know that he's coming up. I don't know if he's even funny. Give a round of applause for Andrew MacLachlan!" I had no material prepared. It was pretty damn terrifying. So I went up and did whatever I could think of. The first two jokes totally bombed because I said them wrong but somehow by the end of 5 minutes people were laughing again.
So this week I went there again and I had stuff planned and I did really well. I did new material and it worked perfectly. One girl was like, dying and I had to ask her if she was alright, which got more laughs. Afterward some other comedian told me he wished he'd thought of some of my jokes which was a nice compliment. The MC got onstage after me and said, "Good job man! You've only been doing this a few weeks?!" and then quickly added for a joke, "Jeez, in seven years you might actually be funny." After the show he told me how he thought I was good though.
Since I've been doing this I've gotten to know a bunch of other comedians and I've seen a bunch of guys perform their stuff a lot. This one guy who I think actually gets paid to do shows sometimes, pro-am or semi-pro or something like that, has started walking oddly just in the past few weeks. It is like his leg is super stiff or something. The jokes this guy tells are usually very abrasive, shocking sort or holocaust/abortion/rape jokes.
So I was wondering what happened and why all of a sudden he started walking oddly and it turns out it's because he got a cast. He got a cast because at one of his shows a few weeks ago he said something that offended someone, they got in an argument after the show and the guy who was offended HIRED GOONS TO BREAK HIS LEGS!!
Ya so... that's fucking horrific.
- Andrew
On tuesday I performed at the Kino Cafe on Cambie. I did alright. The MC there only lets people do 3 minutes unless he's seen them before and he knows they are good. Then he'll give them 5 to 7 minutes. I actually did stand-up there before but he went to the bathroom during my 3 minutes. It was probably a good thing though because last time I didn't do too well. This time I did do well though but he was outside talking to some other comedian at the time... so I guess next time I'll only have 3 minutes again.
On wednesday I performed at the Press-Box on Hastings. That was not the greatest. I did all new stuff and didn't really get the audience's attention. Another comedian got a video of me and the only reason it's funny is because after every joke the only laugh you can hear is the guy holding the camera.
On thursday I went to Zawa's on Commercial Drive. I went there the week before to ask the MC if I could have a spot for the coming week and he said okay and I stayed to watch the rest of the show. Then randomly without telling me, during the show he says, "This next guy is brand new. I just met him tonight. He doesn't know that he's coming up. I don't know if he's even funny. Give a round of applause for Andrew MacLachlan!" I had no material prepared. It was pretty damn terrifying. So I went up and did whatever I could think of. The first two jokes totally bombed because I said them wrong but somehow by the end of 5 minutes people were laughing again.
So this week I went there again and I had stuff planned and I did really well. I did new material and it worked perfectly. One girl was like, dying and I had to ask her if she was alright, which got more laughs. Afterward some other comedian told me he wished he'd thought of some of my jokes which was a nice compliment. The MC got onstage after me and said, "Good job man! You've only been doing this a few weeks?!" and then quickly added for a joke, "Jeez, in seven years you might actually be funny." After the show he told me how he thought I was good though.
Since I've been doing this I've gotten to know a bunch of other comedians and I've seen a bunch of guys perform their stuff a lot. This one guy who I think actually gets paid to do shows sometimes, pro-am or semi-pro or something like that, has started walking oddly just in the past few weeks. It is like his leg is super stiff or something. The jokes this guy tells are usually very abrasive, shocking sort or holocaust/abortion/rape jokes.
So I was wondering what happened and why all of a sudden he started walking oddly and it turns out it's because he got a cast. He got a cast because at one of his shows a few weeks ago he said something that offended someone, they got in an argument after the show and the guy who was offended HIRED GOONS TO BREAK HIS LEGS!!
Ya so... that's fucking horrific.
- Andrew