(no subject)
I am behind on school. Yay. I got sick and then I got behind. I don't feel like I am going to catch up and it is the fifth week. I am steady mood wise. I have moved out of Lacey and am closer to school. Gas is less and I can take the bus some days when the weather is better. My roommate has a dog and he's a sweety. Most dogs are. I haven't really done much writing except in a Halloween fic that won't be done by Halloween unless I don't do any homework and only work on it. I am often bored. I don't have the means to get a laptop so I watch stuff on my phone, so that limits what I can watch. My roommate has a thing that gets netflix amazon prime and hulu plus on it, but I don't like to be in the living room when she is home. Sometimes I am home when she gets there and I finish what I am watching and get off of it.
^
That was done a month ish ago. Things have changed since then. Mood is still steady. finances aren't. I finally quit the janitorial job due to them having a hard time remembering to pay me. I a, still owed over $400, which has made it so I am going to be late on rent. If I don't get what I need by the tenth I will move out and I don't have the means to get a place. I feel like shit even though this wasn't my fault. I had my finances ready, with a couple of hundred until the tenth which would have been more than enough. Food being partially provided by the foodbanks, gas being less expensive and such. But this happened and I am behind. Casey said I am good but I feel so bad that I am doing this shit to her. I wanted to prove otherwise, and that is fucking shot. I have called about it, they tried to put it on a card. When I tried to use it the company the card is from couldn't verify me and wanted a copy of my social security card. I said that wasn't happening. I called Rich, the guy who hired me. I waited for payday, and gave them until today, but I couldn't get to the post office before it closed, so I don't know if they tried to send it to me. I will check again on Monday, and then I am calling Rich back and telling him instead of asking him to send a paper check and hopefully by the end of the month so I can at least attempt to pay a majority of my rent before the first. Then I can give her the last $100-$150 and have some money for presents, but crappy dollar store shit. I am also looking for gigs this week as well, but no one so far as answered any of the emails I sent out. I am so angry.
Still constantly bored. I am doing a little better on my paper. At least, I am making a map for the second ten pager, so it is going better. If I get get the map done in the next few hours (an outline, basically with topics and links and ways to get it put together next Saturday all nighter) I think it will turn out alright. I hope I could get a little help fleshing it out from there, but I think it will be alright. My last paper sucked. This one looks to at least be in the realm of what my teacher wants, length whise. I would like to work on the presentation with my new friend Kinsey, who is doing hers on Asexuality and kind of do a presentaion about the more invisible identities, but I am not sure what her paper looks like so I am not sure how to collab on it. If we do, it will be a zine or something. Sounds fun. Otherwise on my own I will do a comic, but I don't know what it would be about yet.
Mostly feel like a general waste of space. I don't think this will let up until after the new year. Even turning 30 isn't going to do shit. I was going to do all sorts of stuff for myself for my 30th this year since the last three or four birthdays were spent alone. I had plans like get my hair straightened, start applying for my passport, going to get some ribs and shrimp from some restaurant, as well as a case of Corona, $20 of kush, and some cheesecake to chill for a day while watching Korean dramas or something. That isn't happening unless I get money for Christmas or for my birthday from family. I am not looking forward to the holidays at all, as I can't get anything better than dollar store gifts. Since my mother and my sister like to not return my calls, I am not really in the mood to see them this year. If I see my dad, he's paying for the plane ticket, and I don't want him to spend anymore money on me this year, since he paid to see me in the summer, and he has sent me money a few times this year when I needed it. I feel badly about it. I don't know if I would say no if he asks me and offers, as he did for Thanksgiving and I wanted do badly to go, but I had to work. Now that I don't have to work those days, I wish I could say yes. It is too short notice and again, I don't want my father spending anymore money on me this year.
If I don't get that money I don't know what I am going to do. I hate thinking and saying it, but I may have to take legal action, but I don't know if I would just end up spending more trying to get that money or if 400 is enough for a non profit to try and help me. I will look into it and have something ready by monday.
^
That was done a month ish ago. Things have changed since then. Mood is still steady. finances aren't. I finally quit the janitorial job due to them having a hard time remembering to pay me. I a, still owed over $400, which has made it so I am going to be late on rent. If I don't get what I need by the tenth I will move out and I don't have the means to get a place. I feel like shit even though this wasn't my fault. I had my finances ready, with a couple of hundred until the tenth which would have been more than enough. Food being partially provided by the foodbanks, gas being less expensive and such. But this happened and I am behind. Casey said I am good but I feel so bad that I am doing this shit to her. I wanted to prove otherwise, and that is fucking shot. I have called about it, they tried to put it on a card. When I tried to use it the company the card is from couldn't verify me and wanted a copy of my social security card. I said that wasn't happening. I called Rich, the guy who hired me. I waited for payday, and gave them until today, but I couldn't get to the post office before it closed, so I don't know if they tried to send it to me. I will check again on Monday, and then I am calling Rich back and telling him instead of asking him to send a paper check and hopefully by the end of the month so I can at least attempt to pay a majority of my rent before the first. Then I can give her the last $100-$150 and have some money for presents, but crappy dollar store shit. I am also looking for gigs this week as well, but no one so far as answered any of the emails I sent out. I am so angry.
Still constantly bored. I am doing a little better on my paper. At least, I am making a map for the second ten pager, so it is going better. If I get get the map done in the next few hours (an outline, basically with topics and links and ways to get it put together next Saturday all nighter) I think it will turn out alright. I hope I could get a little help fleshing it out from there, but I think it will be alright. My last paper sucked. This one looks to at least be in the realm of what my teacher wants, length whise. I would like to work on the presentation with my new friend Kinsey, who is doing hers on Asexuality and kind of do a presentaion about the more invisible identities, but I am not sure what her paper looks like so I am not sure how to collab on it. If we do, it will be a zine or something. Sounds fun. Otherwise on my own I will do a comic, but I don't know what it would be about yet.
Mostly feel like a general waste of space. I don't think this will let up until after the new year. Even turning 30 isn't going to do shit. I was going to do all sorts of stuff for myself for my 30th this year since the last three or four birthdays were spent alone. I had plans like get my hair straightened, start applying for my passport, going to get some ribs and shrimp from some restaurant, as well as a case of Corona, $20 of kush, and some cheesecake to chill for a day while watching Korean dramas or something. That isn't happening unless I get money for Christmas or for my birthday from family. I am not looking forward to the holidays at all, as I can't get anything better than dollar store gifts. Since my mother and my sister like to not return my calls, I am not really in the mood to see them this year. If I see my dad, he's paying for the plane ticket, and I don't want him to spend anymore money on me this year, since he paid to see me in the summer, and he has sent me money a few times this year when I needed it. I feel badly about it. I don't know if I would say no if he asks me and offers, as he did for Thanksgiving and I wanted do badly to go, but I had to work. Now that I don't have to work those days, I wish I could say yes. It is too short notice and again, I don't want my father spending anymore money on me this year.
If I don't get that money I don't know what I am going to do. I hate thinking and saying it, but I may have to take legal action, but I don't know if I would just end up spending more trying to get that money or if 400 is enough for a non profit to try and help me. I will look into it and have something ready by monday.