Dizzy
Traumatized before 5:30 a.m. What an insane and yet surprisingly magically good way to start the day.
I've already written in full detail the events of my dream so I guess here I just want to talk about how I feel about it. In the less eloquent description of what went down in my personal universe while I slept: Winding Roads, Old friend, submitted to curiosities about getting in touch with someone. Called and realized had nothing to say, he texted me.I texted back like nothing hey. We met up, he was at first glad to see me. We got on a bus to go hang out somewhere. While on the bus moods shift, i was ashamed of my body and my weight certain that he would never be attracted to me as it were. People get on the bus, friend gets on and starts enjoying his attention. I started punching her, then pretended like I didn't know it was her. She goes to the back of the bus he, disgusted with me, wants to go to the back of the bus also, I get up and beg him not to go away that i knew I was shit, I called him for a reason to apologize for being shit (jesus, talk about a fucked up subconscious view of yourself!) He listens almost sympathetically more just like listened unsympathetically, no interest in me what so ever in any form in anyway. The bus leaves us at memorial park. I have to stay behind for SDC stuff he gets back on and goes away just as we learn there are tornado warnings for el paso. All of the following are relevant:
Tornados
To see a tornado in your dream suggests that you are experiencing some extreme emotional outbursts and temper tantrums. Is there a situation or relationship in your life that may be potentially destructive?
Interesting, because I have been experiencing 'unexplained' depression as of late. I think resulting from these terrible self images that i have of myself resulting from said destructive relationship, but realizing that it wasn't only destructive because of the other person involved and not being able to claim responsibility for lack of being able to apologize and say my piece because that would be irrelevant to this persons life. Also, damaged friendship that I am not fully acknowledging my own wrongs in because i felt so wronged by this person; a reoccurring issue in my head. Funny how the tornados occurred just as this person was leaving me in my dream. Relevant to the fact that now that I am more settled in my life having emotional (subtle) outbursts and spurts of depression as a result from this person no longer being in my life and my residual feelings about it all. Also myself image in itself is extremly destructive not just to myself either but to those around me who I am close to because they are indeed affected by my moods (even if I don't really lash out often, i distance myself, which I am now learning hurts also).
To dream that you are in a tornado means that you are feeling overwhelmed and out of control. Your plans will be filled with much complications and you will be met with a series of disappointments.
Yes, Yes, and Yes! This I think related to the work aspect of my feelings of depression and being out of control. Although the first tornado hit after said relationship had influenced my life i wasn't actually in it until i was with the people from my work. I think this symbolizes that I feel overwhelmed at work and also that these fits of depression didn't recently start until shit at work wasn't going as well as I would have liked. Something very simple but served as a trigger to release emotions that had been leveed because work and the positive things in my life did serve as the proverbial levee.
To see several tornadoes in your dream represent people around you who are prone to violent outbursts and shifting mood swings. It may also symbolize a volatile situation or relationship.
Again the tornados are a result of negative relationship that resulted in negative thoughts and subconscious feelings about myself which continue to be destrictuve and result in mood swings and violent outbursts of depression etc.
So when the tornado hit memorial park while I was with people i worked with I eventually ran away and no one else rean away. Running means you are not confronting your fears. I ageree. instead of realizing that this is going to be a void in my life for a while or finding true means of healing I keep desperately searching for a way to fill the void which is virtually impossible. Probably explains recent events of the thoughts I've had about a certain someone because I'm kind of looking to them to fill a void which isn't fair, but he would know nothing of these personal feeligns. It's something I struggle with, largely, alone. the only thing that seems to effect people is my cold distance and mood swings which appear to be out of no where.
This dream explained so much and helpped me see things in a way that is easy to confront. That's the other part of it, I don't know how to stop running. Maybe this new idea of my 30 day ruhcus project to be vulnerable will help me.
Also I woke up extremely grateful that these traumatizing events were just dreams. I am extremely greatful to have the family i have. I need to control my emotions and show the people in my life that I really appreciate them because you never know when tragedy will strike and because I love them and they should know that.
on a side note tehre was some pretty awesome musical appearances by mastodon that went along with the balck and white imagry of people begging to be saved and being left by the richer more privledged individuals who had access to cars to escape the tornados. Mastodon the theme track for the end of civilization as we know it. yet, Siouxsie and the banshees seems also resonate with this dream when I hear it. Thank the universe for my life and for this message. Everything is going to be alright <3
I've already written in full detail the events of my dream so I guess here I just want to talk about how I feel about it. In the less eloquent description of what went down in my personal universe while I slept: Winding Roads, Old friend, submitted to curiosities about getting in touch with someone. Called and realized had nothing to say, he texted me.I texted back like nothing hey. We met up, he was at first glad to see me. We got on a bus to go hang out somewhere. While on the bus moods shift, i was ashamed of my body and my weight certain that he would never be attracted to me as it were. People get on the bus, friend gets on and starts enjoying his attention. I started punching her, then pretended like I didn't know it was her. She goes to the back of the bus he, disgusted with me, wants to go to the back of the bus also, I get up and beg him not to go away that i knew I was shit, I called him for a reason to apologize for being shit (jesus, talk about a fucked up subconscious view of yourself!) He listens almost sympathetically more just like listened unsympathetically, no interest in me what so ever in any form in anyway. The bus leaves us at memorial park. I have to stay behind for SDC stuff he gets back on and goes away just as we learn there are tornado warnings for el paso. All of the following are relevant:
Tornados
To see a tornado in your dream suggests that you are experiencing some extreme emotional outbursts and temper tantrums. Is there a situation or relationship in your life that may be potentially destructive?
Interesting, because I have been experiencing 'unexplained' depression as of late. I think resulting from these terrible self images that i have of myself resulting from said destructive relationship, but realizing that it wasn't only destructive because of the other person involved and not being able to claim responsibility for lack of being able to apologize and say my piece because that would be irrelevant to this persons life. Also, damaged friendship that I am not fully acknowledging my own wrongs in because i felt so wronged by this person; a reoccurring issue in my head. Funny how the tornados occurred just as this person was leaving me in my dream. Relevant to the fact that now that I am more settled in my life having emotional (subtle) outbursts and spurts of depression as a result from this person no longer being in my life and my residual feelings about it all. Also myself image in itself is extremly destructive not just to myself either but to those around me who I am close to because they are indeed affected by my moods (even if I don't really lash out often, i distance myself, which I am now learning hurts also).
To dream that you are in a tornado means that you are feeling overwhelmed and out of control. Your plans will be filled with much complications and you will be met with a series of disappointments.
Yes, Yes, and Yes! This I think related to the work aspect of my feelings of depression and being out of control. Although the first tornado hit after said relationship had influenced my life i wasn't actually in it until i was with the people from my work. I think this symbolizes that I feel overwhelmed at work and also that these fits of depression didn't recently start until shit at work wasn't going as well as I would have liked. Something very simple but served as a trigger to release emotions that had been leveed because work and the positive things in my life did serve as the proverbial levee.
To see several tornadoes in your dream represent people around you who are prone to violent outbursts and shifting mood swings. It may also symbolize a volatile situation or relationship.
Again the tornados are a result of negative relationship that resulted in negative thoughts and subconscious feelings about myself which continue to be destrictuve and result in mood swings and violent outbursts of depression etc.
So when the tornado hit memorial park while I was with people i worked with I eventually ran away and no one else rean away. Running means you are not confronting your fears. I ageree. instead of realizing that this is going to be a void in my life for a while or finding true means of healing I keep desperately searching for a way to fill the void which is virtually impossible. Probably explains recent events of the thoughts I've had about a certain someone because I'm kind of looking to them to fill a void which isn't fair, but he would know nothing of these personal feeligns. It's something I struggle with, largely, alone. the only thing that seems to effect people is my cold distance and mood swings which appear to be out of no where.
This dream explained so much and helpped me see things in a way that is easy to confront. That's the other part of it, I don't know how to stop running. Maybe this new idea of my 30 day ruhcus project to be vulnerable will help me.
Also I woke up extremely grateful that these traumatizing events were just dreams. I am extremely greatful to have the family i have. I need to control my emotions and show the people in my life that I really appreciate them because you never know when tragedy will strike and because I love them and they should know that.
on a side note tehre was some pretty awesome musical appearances by mastodon that went along with the balck and white imagry of people begging to be saved and being left by the richer more privledged individuals who had access to cars to escape the tornados. Mastodon the theme track for the end of civilization as we know it. yet, Siouxsie and the banshees seems also resonate with this dream when I hear it. Thank the universe for my life and for this message. Everything is going to be alright <3