The Sparks Legacy 1.1
Hello hello! I've finally returned from an unintentional hiatus of school and general stupidity to bring you a new update to the Sparks legacy! I had to write everything over again because I couldn't remember any of the commentary I was going to use before! 8D Ahurpdurp. If you need a refresher or it's your first time here, click here for the first chapter. :)
I was originally going to be taking a bit of a break from LiveJournal for a couple of days but then I got excited and ended up writing a whole update's worth of commentary. And I mean hey, I might as well get an update out if I'm just going to be sitting around all day playing the legacy house during my absence anyways. But enough blibberblabber! Away we go:
We start our update with Allie straddling a computer. Surely there is an easier way to surf the internet.
You know, I was contemplating letting you keep that outfit for a while, Cameron, but that shorts and sandals combination just isn't doing it for me. TO THE SHOPS WE GO!
There I stumble across the single greatest sim ever to grace my game. His name is Prester La Raso. I think I'm in love.
Kristen: "DAY-um. DAT. ASS."
I couldn't agree more, Kristen. I couldn't agree more. But Cameron's not here for the ladies.
He's here for some sweet new duds! And sweet they are. Looking good, my elvish friend. Not looking much like a wood elf, but looking good regardless.
Cameron: "What do you want me to do, wear nothing but leaves over my groin?"
...That could be arranged. 8D
And now: A Typical Day in the Life of Cameron
Playing videogames in an apparently satisfactory manner.
Toiling for hours over a batch of hamburgers.
Cooking said hamburgers.
Catching fire to said hamburgers.
And you call yourself a cook.
Cameron: "I regret nothing."
But it's not long before reality sets in.
Cameron: "OH GOD, WHO HAS DONE THIS?"
Don't look at me, you brought this upon yourself. This is what happens when you work in the Culinary career and I consequently overestimate your ability to not blow things up.
SIR YOU ARE GOING THE WRONG WAY.
It's hard to see here, but I enjoy how the reflection on the fire extinguisher is of some trees in the daylight. Oh Maxis, you lazy bastards.
Cameron: "Oh thank goodness, the fireman's here! I'm so relieved."
Fireman: "Hey what up."
SIR YOU HAVE A JOB TO DO. That buoy cannot save itself. It's just an innocent buoy. D:
But eventually the fire was put out, and as punishment for starting it I made Cameron eat all of the burgers he burned.
Cameron: "Aw, what."
Meanwhile, what was our founder doing?
Allie: "Ooh, SSX3 came pre-packaged with the computer? How exciting. :D "
Allie: *evil leer*
Cameron: "You know, I smell pretty bad from that fire-"
YOU ARE NOT SHOWERING UNTIL YOU HAVE EATEN ALL OF THEM.
Cameron: "But-"
ALL OF THEM.
In other news, that same night the legacy house recieved its first substantial snowfall and I shed a single tear.
The morning after, Cameron was sufficiently old mannish and I chortled.
Sensing the impending doom that was her boyfriend cooking, Allie brought a pizza home from work.
But Cameron would not be outdone.
Cameron: "See, I can cook! I can cook so well that I made this! I MADE THIS FOR YOU."
And then they made up their differences and snogged. But right before Allie grabbed him, she yelled out, "Geddan!" and all I could think of was their bodies twisting freakishly in midair with Promise by Hirose Kohmi playing in the background. (°⊿°)
A creeper this way comes... again. Do you think this will turn into a once-an-update thing?
Poor Cameron was just napping defenslessly on the couch.
Robber: "Egads! I've been hoodwinked!"
Cameron: "Huzabuwaugh."
Cameron: *fusses*
Cameron: "Excuse me, sir. I believe you have something of mine."
Robber: "HAVE AT YOU!"
Allie & Cameron: "Eh, I'm over it."
BLIND DEATH MATCH. I really need to detownify those eyes. o.o
Cameron: "Waahh, we were robbed and we didn't even get compensatiuhhuhhuhhhhnn."
Allie: *husky voice* "Suck it up, you baby."
D'aww, Allie's all adorable and teacher-ish.
The ultimate happy working couple shot. Needs MOAR FLOWERS.
Allie: "Stop scrolling, I'm trying to read my horoscope."
Cameron: "But this is a recipe website and I was here first. :c "
Clearly these two do not understand the concept of sharing.
The legacy family friend Siobhan stopped by and was generally adorable. If her face wasn't so squished and both first generation adults' faces so long, I would totally vouch for her as generation 2 spouse. But I think we need to slowly work our way to shorter faces first. xD Don't want long chins and high noses. Or at least I don't, because it bugs me. >.>
Since all of that snow from the first legacy snowfall accumulated, I sent Allie outside to make the first snow angel ever in my game. Sad, huh? I've had Seasons for more than half a year now. :P
Unfortunately, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get her to change into something even slightly insulated.
She seemed unperturbed.
Granted, Siobhan was also stupid about not wearing a coat, despite the fact that she came over with one. Thus, what ensued was THE FREEZIEST SNOWBALL FIGHT.
Allie: "OH GOD I AM HIT THE ICY PAIN" +1
And then they jumped around a lot and complained about being chilly. You people.
After Siobhan left, I was overcome by the couple's cuteness. Thus:
Allie: "The preciousss... 8D "
If that joke hasn't already been done at least once before, for shame, Sims community!
Cameron: "I feel like there's something missing here."
Cameron: "Oh! There it is."
Behold, my glorious architectural powers! They have been given a new upstairs bedroom.
They were more than happy to christen it.
How could you do such an act in front of me?! My delicate virgin sensibilities! ;__;
Yeah, you two look all nice and snug. It only took you SEVEN TRIES AND FIVE HOURS TO CONCIEVE. (╬ ಠ益ಠ)
Allie: "Unfortunate things were gotten in my eye this night."
(ﾟдﾟ)
Thankfully, they make up for that episode of ultimate creepiness by breaking out into some elegant bathroom dancing.
Cameron: "I am so getting laid again tonight."
Not with unsanitary habits like that. You nasty. D:
I thought it was high time the greenhouse actually got some use, so I sent Cameron out to be useful.
Cameron: "Looks like it's time for a..." *sunglasses* "hoedown."
YEEAAAHHHHHHHHHH
And so the tilling was complete.
Cameron: "WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ME NOW, SMALL PLOT OF LAND."
Such cheerful seeding for such an angry gardener.
Apparently two days went by during which I took a grand total of zero pictures. I give you: Allie's second pop! *silent cheers*
At some point the house accumulated roaches and the townies stepped in to do the job. Lucky for me, as I was too lazy to hire someone.
Townie: "FRANKLY I AM APPALLED AT THE UNHEALTHINESS." *sprays toxic waste*
Allie: "This berber is so goddamn comfortable azabuasdfho;nzxzzzzzz."
I look forward to the complete normalcy of this child, really I do.
Realizing that the threat of children with the wrong last name was imminent, Cameron and Allie performed an impromptu shotgun wedding in the kitchen. Really it's just because neither of them had friends to invite to the wedding party.
Allie & Cameron: "'Til death do us part, blahblahetc-
PANCAAAAAAKES~"
And then Allie trotted off to the floweriest room in the house to give birth CAMOUFLAGE NINJA STYLE.
It was so effective that even her own husband mosied right by.
Cameron: "My, what beautiful stitching on this lace curtain! Exquisite."
Allie: "WHAT! ARE YOU DOING!"
Allie: "Woah!" 8D
I would be surprised too if my baby came out perfectly clean and looking to be four weeks old already.
Allie: "Cameron look look what I made."
Cameron: "WHAT I have to move the cursor in a perfect spiral to learn Flipendo this is stupid."
Cameron: "Oh hey, excellent work on birthing. Why are you giving this to me?"
Oh you know, only TWO MORE REASONS. *facepalms* Triplets on the first try, just my luck. Ten bucks says they'll be on welfare within the next two days.
From right to left to unloved one: Enna, Gabrielle, and India. My naming scheme for this generation is pretty stupid but I enjoy it. It's every other letter in the alphabet. Allie (B) Cameron (D) Enna (F) Gabrielle (H) India. There is no way I am getting past Q, though, max.
India: My god this berber is so comfortable.
The next day the gardener came and, upon noticing that the family had basically no monies, proceeded to steal the ladder to the bunkbed. NOW HOW IS SHE GOING TO SLEEP BESIDES WITH HER HUSBAND geez have you never heard of 1920's privacy you strumpet.
As you can see, absolutely nothing else occurred while the children were babies.
There were a lot of precious autonomous moments, though.
Cameron actually turned out to be an excellent father, taking care of the triplets all day while Allie was off at work. So d'aww-worthy.
Of course he always made time for when his besties stopped by. Stop tempting me with those elf ears woman, I need some diversity in the next generation. Hnnghhh. >.<
And before I knew it, it was time for the kidlets to grow up.
Allie: "Whoo yeah birthday, can I leave the room now? You've been in your robe all day and frankly it is rancid."
India: SO UNCOMFORTABLE.
Somehow this is the only good picture I managed to get of Enna. Le sigh. Turns out her father's template is an eensy bit broken in the toddler stage but it only seems to show itself in the nose and mouth areas. I can live with it.
A lovely upskirt shot of Gabrielle. They start so young.
And India. To be honest she frightens me half the time. There's a definite Michael Jackson vibe there. It's the nose, mostly.
Gabrielle managed to make herself my favourite in about five seconds flat. SHO CUTE! *squishes* She's probably the fussiest of the three, though.
This basically sums up their entire toddlerhood. Allie would come home from work and sleep while Cameron taught them all of their tiny tot skills.
Allie: "What a perfectly delicious piece of char."
Pancakes: Oh god I can feel the skin cancer-
Allie: "PERFECTLY DELICIOUS."
Oh dear, motherhood is getting to her already. *tuts* Also lolforever you do not have that kind of money to spend at will.
Of course Allie has no problem promoting the age-old adage of, "Families who nap together, stay together."
Cameron: *appears in shower in a puff of smoke* "I have come with perky buttocks to spread the joy of love!"
Cameron: *prances*
I have this weird problem where I love watching sims brush their teeth. It's always just so cute!
Cameron: "You know on second thought while I'm in here I might as well use this resource lol just kidding I just wanted a shower"
I mean come on. I can only dream of being this adorable whilst swishing fluids around my mouth. But it was not long before I realized...
She has become... one of them. I knew those ducks were up to no good. Hide the camera, Facebook must never know of this face.
How productive! For Cameron. This update, not so much. GOSH THERE IS NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT WHATSOEVER.
Which is a pity, because I'm ending it here with Cameron looking dapper as hell. What ho, a birthday cliffhanger, how original! 8D
NEXT TIME:
- Troublesome children!
- More pregnancy fun time!
- Risque nannies, ohoho~
Thanks for reading, I'll see you next time! Same bat time, same bat channel.