Beauty of Roses
Lily sat at her usual table in the library, right under the large window. She was hunched over her Transfiguration homework, determined to finish it before dinner. She had plans that night and those involved a certain Slytherin, not homework. For once, she wanted to be able to relax instead of worrying about the N.E.W.T.s and her ever growing study load. And tonight, she thought, was her tenth date with Regulus Black. She felt reckless and giddy thinking of him. Nine dates so far and nobody was the wiser. They had kept it to themselves, not least because there would be disapproval simply due to their different Houses - not to mention the fact that he was a year below her, never mind the fact that he was only a few months younger and unfortunate enough to be born after August 31.
But tonight she was determined to make it official. She was sick of hiding it even from her closest friends. She felt sick of lying to them, even if those lies were little white ones. After all, she was studying when she was with him. Just… not anything on the Hogwarts curriculum. She glanced at her watch. Only one hour until dinner and then another one until she would meet Regulus again. She smiled and then forced herself back to her Transfiguration essay.
~*~
“Lily?” She stiffened at his deep, smooth, hypnotising voice and gripped her fork tighter while curling her other hand into a fist. She would not let him see how much he affected her; how much she loathed him right now; just how much he had hurt her last night. Her eyes trained on the breakfast plate before her, she ground out, “Yes, Black?”
Lily sensed the eyes of the other students on her. Not many were at breakfast this early, but never before had Regulus approached her at their table. Never before had he called her ‘Lily’ in public. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It took all her strength to look at him. But when she looked up, he was no where to be found. Instead, in his place was a rose and attached to it, a key.
She glanced around the Great Hall, wondering where he had gone and regardless of her earlier feelings of nothing short of hate towards him, a small smile tugged on her lips. Maybe this was his way to apologise. Maybe all was not lost between them just yet. With great difficulty, she got a hold of herself and kept a neutral face when she reached for the rose and the little, delicate, golden key. It hung off the rose on a gold chain which was even more delicate.
Lily was glad none of her friends were at breakfast yet. She didn’t feel like explaining why Regulus Black of all people had left her a red rose and a golden key. The only other students at her table this early were a couple of first years and a rather ruffled looking Sirius Black. The latter stared at her with wide eyes, but for once didn’t come up with a smart comment. His friend, James Potter, sat down next to him and joined Sirius in staring at her. She quickly averted her eyes. They could think whatever they wanted. Big-headed, self-absorbed prats that they were. She still didn’t understand why Professor Dumbledore had appointed Potter as Head Boy. Granted, he did his duties, but how could the Headmaster have forgotten all those horrible pranks he had played on other students?
She shook her head slightly to rid herself of thoughts about Potter and focussed instead on that key. Quickly, she took out her wand and cast a reducing charm on the rose, then carefully packed it into the front pocket of her school bag. She wondered what the key would open, if it would open anything at all. She nearly felt nauseous at the cheesy thought that maybe - just maybe - Regulus meant it to be the key to his heart. That maybe, he had changed his mind about them; maybe he would take that step she craved so much. Maybe he’d take those hurtful words from last night back.
But should she really forgive him? How could he make her feel so queasy, make her stomach flip just by leaving her a single rose with a key? Especially after breaking it off with her the night before? He had hurt her, saying that he didn’t want anyone to know and when prompted to give a reason for it, calling her names she never expected him to use for her. She had stood in the empty Charms classroom and listened to him telling her she should’ve known this wasn’t a date. That this, their tenth meeting, would only serve for him to break up with her. What hurt her most was not even calling her a Mudblood. She could deal with that - had done it for years whenever she and Severus had a fight. No, what stung most was that he played on her inexperience.
She had slapped him then and rushed away. She was proud that she hadn’t given herself to him, proud that she had kept her tears at bay until she had reached the confines of her four-poster bed with the curtains and a Silencio firmly in place.
Sitting there, at the breakfast table, she scolded herself for even contemplating the possibility of forgiving him but couldn’t help wondering just where that key would fit.
~*~
Three days she had been wondering in every free minute she could find. She thought of places that might have locks to fit it; of the lock itself. Would it be a dainty little thing, locking a room or a little box? But even if, where would she find it? It like she could just march into the Slytherin common room, Head Girl or not, and demand to see Regulus’s personal items. And even if she could, she’d never lower herself to such behaviour. After all, she respected other people’s privacy as much as she wanted everyone else to respect her own.
No, there had to be another way to find out.
To make matters more difficult, Regulus hadn’t spoken to her in those three days apart from the odd nod in her direction, rarely followed by a verbal greeting on his part. Nothing out of the ordinary, just a quick, “Evans.” And it irked her. She knew it shouldn’t but it did. They’d kept their distance not wanting other students to know about their relationship. So it wasn’t as if anything had changed to the outside world. But since he left her that rose and the key she thought he would at least make an attempt to speak with her.
Her pride didn’t let her go to him. He had hurt her and he would have to make the next move. After his outburst, she wouldn’t let him get under her skin again that easily. The thought made her think she should hex herself. Of course she wanted to run to him, forgive him, thank him for the rose. But the feelings of disappointment and betrayal she had encountered that night had not yet been forgotten and she resisted. Instead, she went back to wondering just what that key would open.
~*~
On the seventh day, just as she left Greenhouse 3, she noticed something glistening behind one of the two flutterby bushes that framed the glass door entrance. At first, she wasn’t sure if she only imagined it, but even after she rubbed her tired eyes, she saw a glimpse of red and gold behind the bush. Lily glanced around to make sure nobody was watching before crouching down to retrieve the objects.
Another red rose with yet another golden key.
Quickly, she scanned the grounds surrounding the greenhouse. She was the last, the rest of her classmates had already left. Regulus’s class had been in this greenhouse the period before them. She thought she should be smiling, yet she frowned. How was she supposed to find two locks for two keys? She began to feel stupid about it all but shrunk the items anyway and carefully placed them into the front pocket of her bag. She would get to the bottom of this, even if it was the last thing she ever did.
As she walked back to Gryffindor Tower, glad to finally have reached the weekend, she thought about her week. The previous weekend had been a disaster with Regulus’s behaviour towards her. The rose and key had come out of nowhere and he hadn’t made any attempts to talk to her. Come to think of it, not even Potter had made an attempt to ask her out. And that was a first. Well, at least a first since fourth year when he had started to ask her out to every single Hogsmeade weekend. And this weekend was yet another of those. Maybe he’s finally gotten the message, she thought, wondering why she didn’t feel as elated as she had always imagined she would.
Tiredly, she crawled through the portrait hole into the common room. Not for the first time, she cursed the entrance to their tower. It had to be a silly portrait hole, it couldn’t have been anything more normal like a charmed door. Having got through, she straightened out her skirt and robes and headed to her dormitory to change her clothes and freshen up before diving into her homework. Alice Moore, a fellow seventh year and friend, stopped her before she could get halfway up the stairs.
“Lily, wait!”
“Hi Alice, what’s going on?” She stopped and turned to look at her friend.
“I’d like to ask you the same. You’ve been very distant all week.”
“I know, I’m sorry Alice, I just… I’ve got a lot on my mind right now.” Lily hated that worried look Alice fixed her with. She was fine, after all. But Alice had a point. She had neglected her friends in favour of brooding over the key. And now she had twice the thinking to do.
“Well, maybe this will cheer you up.” She handed a wrapped present to Lily. “I was asked to give it to you by some third year. I think you tutored him. You know, small boy with blond hair and glasses? Has a scar on his left cheek.”
“Yeah, Christopher. Wonder why he’s giving me a present. I haven’t tutored him since last year. Not that I ever got a present from him before… weird.” Lily turned the brightly wrapped package over in her hands. “Feels like a book.”
“Well, the little guy did his homework so, eh? Maybe he developed a crush on you.” Alice chuckled and Lily joined in. She really didn’t fancy a third year to have a crush on her.
“Right. Well, I’ll go up and freshen up a little. Back in a short while.” She waved at her friend and continued upstairs while Alice went back to what she was doing.
Lily threw her bag onto her bed and, with a sigh, took off her school robes. She was curious about the present but decided to change her clothes first. She needed to feel more comfortable and quickly changed into a soft, green cotton track suit, brushed her hair, and tied it back in a simple pony tail. Satisfied, she took the present and unceremoniously tore the paper off it. One of her hands flew to her mouth as she stared at the book in her hand.
It had a simple, black leather cover without any title or inscription on it. It also had a small, golden lock. Her heart beat wildly as she rummaged for the two keys in her bag. The first key she found was slightly too big for the lock, so she reached for the second, silently cursing the fact that her hands were trembling as the tiny lock clicked open. She held her breath and opened the book.
“Dear Lily,
There are so many things I want to say to you.
So many things I need to say to you.
But above all, I want to apologise. I know I have
acted like a right prat and I want to make it up to
you.
I’ve kept my distance recently but to be honest, I want to
get to know you. Maybe we can start over again? If you
agree please leave the second key behind the statue of
Gregory the Smarmy tonight.
I will then be able to write into my own version of
this journal. They’re an enchanted pair. I’ll be able to
see in mine what you write into yours and vice versa.
X
Lily read the entry over and over again. Regulus wanted to get to know her again. Why wouldn’t he just speak to her? They could talk face to face, maybe even go on a proper date. But, after her fifth read, she supposed that this way it might be easier. After all, it was easier to write thoughts down. You’d think things through more thoroughly before answering. And most likely, words that would be regretted later would never be shared in the first place.
Her mind made up, she took her homework for the weekend, the diary, and the second key and made her way out of the dormitory. She quickly located Alice and asked her to keep an eye on her books while she was gone. Without any further explanation, she fairly skipped out of the common room and towards that ghastly statue, where she carefully hid the rose and the key. She was giddy again, thinking how romantic it was to have a little secret, to leave secret messages for each other, and she looked forward to really getting to know Regulus Black.
When she returned to the common room, her smile had reached her eyes but no amount of prodding from Alice or any of her other friends made her give up her little secret. Not yet, anyway. They would all find out when the time was right.
End of Chapter 1 - Chapter 2