Another Milk
I'm going to sound like a lot of these depressed youths on these weblogs/online journals here so bare with me. I'm just disappointed in others right now. At least I'm keeping it off of myself. I'm upset with the people around here. I feel as though nobody around here can match me in any sort of romantic state. Just as in the past they cant see my true intentions and thoughts that make me who i am. Their personality may be too strong or just the opposite. Eitether way it keeps me at a distance. Some are blind to their own thoughts they preach. Others just change. No one around here can make me feel like i belong in their heart. No one can see the invitation to mine. Those of the past still fumble around changing yet still remaining the same way, in a sort of tragic sense. I guess I'm finally lonely. It took 3 seasons for me to get to this point. Now that I'm here, i feel sort of thankful. It doesnt take away my disappointment. I still am upset that i cant carelessly call that someone up and talk to about anything in any sort of manner i desire to. There isnt that someone to share the feeling of just being near one another. No one can see my will to love with no reserve. Onward to something new, at least i tried. I'm still thankful...not bitter.
I apologize to a few near to me who will see distance grow between us. No offense should be taken. People change and i dont try to hold on till the tear-soaked, bitter end. Its not that you're not worth it, these are just changes. We've grown together and are perfectly capable of growing apart from each other.
Dont get me wrong, life isnt just a giant poopfest these days. Music stuff is going very well. My drumming has been very kick ass lately. I've been focused and creative. The Parish boys and I have been hitting on most, if not all, cylinders. I guess its sort of ironic timing. I'm still in love with music and each day brings a new set of realizations.
I went to the range yesterday...wow. :sigh: And tonight i went to the cemetary of my 15 year old passion...ironic to me.
I'm signing up for classes tomorrow! Yay for learning! I'm excited, seriously.
...Love.
I apologize to a few near to me who will see distance grow between us. No offense should be taken. People change and i dont try to hold on till the tear-soaked, bitter end. Its not that you're not worth it, these are just changes. We've grown together and are perfectly capable of growing apart from each other.
Dont get me wrong, life isnt just a giant poopfest these days. Music stuff is going very well. My drumming has been very kick ass lately. I've been focused and creative. The Parish boys and I have been hitting on most, if not all, cylinders. I guess its sort of ironic timing. I'm still in love with music and each day brings a new set of realizations.
I went to the range yesterday...wow. :sigh: And tonight i went to the cemetary of my 15 year old passion...ironic to me.
I'm signing up for classes tomorrow! Yay for learning! I'm excited, seriously.
...Love.