ramblings of a cynical shipper
I don't really know what got me thinking about this today, but I've found myself contemplating fandom and shipping and my place in it all. I feel I'm still relatively new to the world of Fandom...I guess it was official a couple years ago when I posted my first CI story, but I've always lurked without even realizing what I was doing. I still learn new fannish words and phrases and find myself perplexed at times because I see something like "WIP" and have to go look it up so I actually have some clue as to what a person is talking about.
"Shipper" is the first word I figured out -- it's kind of inevitable to learn that one early because fandom is very much about shipping, not the only thing, but definitly a front runner, whether they be with OCs, established pairings, or what you wish were established pairings. When I first started exploring fan fic, I wasn't completely sold on the idea of shipping, but somewhere along the line, someone (I honestly am not sure who) sold me on the G/E ship. I guess it was a combination of what I read in the good fic I found and how I processed the information I saw on screen. Either way, I've obviously never looked back
As much as I openly admit that I am a G/E shipper, I'm not really comfortable with the label. I'm fearful of lables in general because they always lead to generalizations and stereotypes, which leads me to feeling like I have to hyper defend my motivations -- to prove that I'm not just some naive kid grasping at straws. Granted stereotypes do generally come about because of some truth, but that doesn't make it accurate or fair.
I'm really not even sure if I'm a shipper in the truest sense, since G/E are the only pairing I write (or would write) that isn't already in canon. In fact there's probably more popular or just as popular ships that you'd have to hold a gun to my head to get me to write like Logan/Barek or Benson/Stabler (sorry, I know there's some of you out there on my f-list). I will admit a part of this is because I just don't care for the character Olivia Benson, though I will say some posts by surreallis where she analyzes Benson have made re-think how I precieve her. I can't say I've been won over, but she makes clear and valid points, which I very much respect. Plus, I've also noticed that I do get hung up on canon details and Stabler is very much married in canon. The detailed oriented, OCD part of my brain can't see past that.
Or with the "Buffy" verse I'm not really a fan of the Buffy/Angel pairing and that's like THE love story of the "Buffy" verse. In fact I didn't even like Angel all that much until after he went evil, though I think he is all around more likable on "Angel" than on "Buffy." I guess I'm just not much for the "star cross lovers" love stories because I don't get them. I don't really believe in love at first sight -- lust, sure, but not love. Now, that's not to say I don't think lust can evolve into love...just like friendship can evolve into a romantice love. I am very much on board, however, for the Cordy/Angel and Buffy/Spike pairings because those relationships are concievable to me.
I guess one reason why I do gravitate to G/E because somewhere in my mind it makes sense when I look at how a relationship could evolve (like the way we see Angel & Cordy's relationship change). If they had incorparated outside romantic relationships early on, with interesting (this is key -- b/c that Holly girl for Logan was a let down to me) background characters, then I don't know how inclined I would be to ship them, but as it is, that's how I see it.
CI really drew me into fandom so completely, because it has always (well was at least) been open ended when it came to the characters lives. The writers always gave us just enough to spark our interest, but left us plently of room to hypothosize the rest, to assume what we weren't shown by the clues/cues we were are given. The thing that makes this so awesome to me is this really leaves room for geniune debate, but few concrete answers. Some one can make just as solid an arguement to ship G/E as to why not. I'm not sure you can really say that about many other fanon pairings because most shows have much more in canon to fill in the blanks.
One thing I have found as I've entered this fandom world that both bothers me and fascinates me is the fact there are cliques that form, just as they do in RL -- many based on who you ship. This is really rather ridiculous when you think about -- I mean characters you think should be having sex with each other on a TV show should not dictate the people you become friends with, but it does. And I am guilty of this to extent because it is easier. We get very up in arms about our ships and are non-ships, but I have friends that are not G/E shippers and that's fine -- we just know we will not agree on that and move on because at the end of the day it's just not as important as getting to know a really interesting person. I know several people, myself included, who have felt excluded because of their shipping preferences. I'm not saying I expect people who don't ship the same as me to read my stories or anything like that, but over all no one should feel like they can't participate in a community or be told hurtful things.
I can't say I really know what the point of the is...it is called rambling for a reason, right? :) But I guess since I am still learning my way through this fandom world that I'm interested in other peoples opinions on fandom and all that comes with it if anyone is inclined to share. Oh well, I'll stop now.