eh
i am SO fustraited with people right now. one of my friends is so focused on herself and its driving me insane. i know i should talk to her about how i feel but i just cant right now. it would be better to tell her before i write my feelings down, but i cant find the words to describe how i feel about her right now. its NOT good though. i love her ( Read more... )
We'll support you in anything that you do Laura no matter how mad or angry you are at us. It's just kind of sudden, and sad, that this summer that we had planned to spend, all together, for the last time (most likely), probably isn't going to be as good as we thought it was going to be. In my mind, I keep thinking, "well why wouldn't she want to have a memorable summer hanging out with us, versus memories that have a 50-50 chance of becoming good or bad if she spent most of it with her boyfriend?" But then again, I'm not in your position, so it's not really my place to say.
And just in regards to how we act, and how you joke and criticize us... I feel like I get enough critcism from my family, as well as myself- the last people I need criticism from is my friends. And if I want it, I'll ask for it. Frankly, I think it's taken me long enough to get to the point that I'm at right now: the point where I don't care about what anyone thinks anymore. I know your hearts in the right place, and your only doing what you think is right.
I hope that you don't end up taking that wrong and spending a few days mad at me, but, at least I said what I thought I had to say. And once again, I will always love you, no matter what.
Reply
Okay, so like you've only hung out with me and Rob ONCE. And that was one of the first times he was hanging out with you and the girls, so i wanted to make sure that he was going to get along with you guys, and not uncomfortable and angry cuz he was my guest, and i was sopossed to make sure he was entertained. I'm sorry that i thought that you guys would understand for this one night if i didn't hang out with you every second, cuz i wanted to make sure my boyfriend was having a good time. I thought that you guys would want to do the same thing in my position, instead of thinking that i was putting you guys as second best. Which is definately not the case. I know you guys are my lifelong friends, and i dont know about Rob yet, but i'm sure you could have done without my constant company for one evening so that i could make a boyfriend less-uncomfortable, seeing as you spent the rest of the night that way sleeping over trinea's house.
And saying that you had no plans to include Rob in our summer, is just crap. Cuz i heard you say to trinea "oh trinea, bobby is so awesome, and so good for our group of friends." So if you don't include my boyfriend, how are you going to include Trinea's love interest? I can't help it if Rob is a bit shy and doesn't make friends as quickly as bobby, and may not be as hott as bobby by your standards, but i like rob a whole lot. And He is a big part of my life right now, and when you say "we just wanna hear about YOU." you ARE hearing about me. Rob is me. I actually have a steady boyfriend that i seriously connect with and enjoy, and seems to be the only one making me happy right now.
And about how you feel like i'm ruining your summer, but i hate to break it to you, when i heard you talking about how great this summer was going to be, i knew it wasn't going to work out, but i didn't have the heart to tell you that i'd be working 3 days a week, and playing softball those three days, and katie would have the car to go to work, and my parents might not let me go on a day trip to Cedar Point, which it looks like i'd have to drive there too since nobody else has their licenses. So i guess by me not being available this summer, i ruined your transportation. "Most memorable" is stupid. I gave up on that a while ago when i realized i would be constantly playing softball and earning money. You guys aren't anywhere in there, so i let it down easy to myself, and i didn't get around to spelling it out to you guys.
Ah ha, and last the critisism. Okay, right now i'm reading what you're saying to me, and i'm absorbing it and understanding what you're saying, but i'm also defending myself. That's all a part of critisim. But I too, get critisism from my family, myself, my softball team, my "employers", etc. But i'm not giving any excuses to why i can't get any from my friends. I expect it from my friends, and i would feel like i could take it best from my friends, because they're trying to help me realize how my peers percieve me. And they're there to support me, or help me realize my mistakes. My friends are not just there to jump around on the trampoline with and laugh, and eat food with, and go shopping with, and cruise around with in a car listening to a sweet band with. Thats all amazingly fun, but i want friends who will help me shape who i am to be a better person, and who will accept other people that i bring into my life who make me happy and are good for me.
And you know how you didn't want me to take it the wrong way? So you just wanted me to sit and read that, and not be offended about how you're saying that i would put a boyfriend before my friends? And how i disappointed you? And how you don't respect my opinions? Well if you don't care what anyone thinks anymore, then i guess that is what you were hoping i would take that crap from you. But here's what i think for anyone who was nosy enough to read this online-livejournal-fight: I think that the only way we could all be happy is to not care about anyone but ourselves. And if that's what you're accusing me of, and even though i'm not happy, then i guess thats what you think. And that's all you care about.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment