(no subject)
so, the one thing i've noticed in my life is that I seem to be drawn to people I feel NEED me in their life. I don't do it on purpose, I don't think, but it's like I need someone i can take care of in order to feel important. Don and I had a long talk when I dropped him off at the house he's living in last night; he's really frustrated with the fact he doesn't have more to offer me. he was all, i should be driving YOU home, I wish you could stay here (he's currently in a YMCA-sponsored low-rent public housing kind of a deal), i wish i could do that kind of thing for you. It bothers me a little bit, that he can't, but at the same time I like him enough to cater to his situation a little more if that's what it takes. I told him that... if I didn't like him as much as I do, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't put forth the effort into whatever this is we're doing. there's a deeper level of comfort with Don that I haven't felt in a long time, and I love it.
man, if i were a gold digger and didn't care, i'd have it made. easy. I'm also seeing Mark, you know, the one with the house AND the condo that's almost paid off, the brand new truck, the jet skis. but that shit doesn't matter anything to me, sure it's nice, but a guy like that can buy any girl he wants. Am I flattered he wants me? sure I am.
the difference is, i want to feel like someone's partner, not their playtoy like i've felt so many times before. that's what it comes down to.
go self analyzation!
man, if i were a gold digger and didn't care, i'd have it made. easy. I'm also seeing Mark, you know, the one with the house AND the condo that's almost paid off, the brand new truck, the jet skis. but that shit doesn't matter anything to me, sure it's nice, but a guy like that can buy any girl he wants. Am I flattered he wants me? sure I am.
the difference is, i want to feel like someone's partner, not their playtoy like i've felt so many times before. that's what it comes down to.
go self analyzation!