Fic: A Dash of Innocence (Aki-centric) [PG-13]
Title: A Dash of Innocence
Chapters: One-shot
Author: lylark
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Language, masturbation
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Aki-centric (Sadie)
Synopsis: It felt weird and nonsensical and stupid and dirty.
Comments: I haven't seen that many Sadie fanfics, so this is my first attempt to write one. Comments are forever treasured. ♥
Aki frowned as he continued to wash his hands, reaching for more unscented hand soap after a few seconds passed. There was only the quiet shaaaa of the ice cold water landing on his skin followed by the insistent scrubbing, though his numerous thoughts were probably bouncing off the bathroom walls; this made the process all that unnerving. He made sure to keep his head down, thin hair brushing over his gloomy eyes that said something more.
It's better this way, he concluded. He didn't want to be faced with the desperation that was surely apparent on his face.
It was slowly becoming a habit. It happened occassionally, then one or twice a week, then gradually progressed to almost every other day; any location was fine to him as long as he had some time to himself. He didn't want to admit it (I hate it so much I--). Sure, sure, it was a healthy thing to do, but he didn't know how wrong it would feel afterwards, being sexually frustrated and having to touch one's self to solve the problem. It felt weird and nonsensical and stupid and dirty.
Dirty. Like he was throwing a dash of innocence in exchance for a handful of self-satisfaction. Like he was losing his sanity, getting trapped in some fantasies that just weren't good enough.
This isn't right. Something like this isn't right.
It was like eating a certain type of food that you can't eat because of allergic reactions, but you eat it anyways because fuck, looking at it didn't compare to know good it felt to make your taste buds content. Then, the consequences showed themselves, damaging your health for a little while as hives form and shame (the fucking shame) sets in.
Shit.
His pale skin was raw and throbbing.
He needed to stop scrubbing his hands so much. He needed to stop.
With a relieved sigh, he found himself drying them off. Then washing them again. The drying them. Then washing them. Then--
Why can't I stop?
Chapters: One-shot
Author: lylark
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Language, masturbation
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Aki-centric (Sadie)
Synopsis: It felt weird and nonsensical and stupid and dirty.
Comments: I haven't seen that many Sadie fanfics, so this is my first attempt to write one. Comments are forever treasured. ♥
Aki frowned as he continued to wash his hands, reaching for more unscented hand soap after a few seconds passed. There was only the quiet shaaaa of the ice cold water landing on his skin followed by the insistent scrubbing, though his numerous thoughts were probably bouncing off the bathroom walls; this made the process all that unnerving. He made sure to keep his head down, thin hair brushing over his gloomy eyes that said something more.
It's better this way, he concluded. He didn't want to be faced with the desperation that was surely apparent on his face.
It was slowly becoming a habit. It happened occassionally, then one or twice a week, then gradually progressed to almost every other day; any location was fine to him as long as he had some time to himself. He didn't want to admit it (I hate it so much I--). Sure, sure, it was a healthy thing to do, but he didn't know how wrong it would feel afterwards, being sexually frustrated and having to touch one's self to solve the problem. It felt weird and nonsensical and stupid and dirty.
Dirty. Like he was throwing a dash of innocence in exchance for a handful of self-satisfaction. Like he was losing his sanity, getting trapped in some fantasies that just weren't good enough.
This isn't right. Something like this isn't right.
It was like eating a certain type of food that you can't eat because of allergic reactions, but you eat it anyways because fuck, looking at it didn't compare to know good it felt to make your taste buds content. Then, the consequences showed themselves, damaging your health for a little while as hives form and shame (the fucking shame) sets in.
Shit.
His pale skin was raw and throbbing.
He needed to stop scrubbing his hands so much. He needed to stop.
With a relieved sigh, he found himself drying them off. Then washing them again. The drying them. Then washing them. Then--
Why can't I stop?