Title: If You Ever Have Need
Fandom: Merlin
Rating: T
Warnings: Slight violence and mild language. No beta. All mistakes are my own
Pairings: Mostly Merlin/Arthur friendship. Some mentions of Arthur/Gwen romance. No Slash
Spoilers: Through the end of season 2
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the world of Camelot. They belong to BBC.
Summary: When yet another creature attacks Camelot, Merlin is forced to reveal his powers. Unable to kill his closest friend, Arthur sends him away. What does that mean for their destiny?
Chapter 14: Destiny
Crashing filled the hall. The ground shook and trembled. It bucked beneath their feet like a living being. Gwen nearly lost her footing. Morgana screamed and threw herself backward against the wall, dragging Gwen with her. She felt her magic burst out of her. A word appeared in her mind, whispered in Merlin’s voice.
“Gescildan!” she cried and a glimmering shield appeared around them. She stared up at it in surprise. She’d never intentionally done magic before.
For what seemed like an eternity, the rubble rained down from the ceiling. Morgana’s arms, which she’d thrown up instinctively when she cast the spell, began to tremble under the strain of maintaining the shield under the onslaught of rock.
Why hasn’t Merlin done something? she wondered desperately, risking a glance at the pile of rubble that covered the ground where Merlin, Arthur, and Leon had been standing. There was no sign of them.
Morgana fought to reassure herself. They’re all right. Merlin has survived far worse. He can protect himself and Arthur and Leon. They will all be fine. They have to be.
Another stone struck the shield. The tremors that rippled through her magic at the impact nearly sent Morgana to her knees. She knew in her heart that her untrained magic wouldn’t last much longer and when it failed, she and Gwen would have no protection.
Morgause’s voice rose piercingly above the cacophony. “Áblinnaþ!” she commanded.
The hall rumbled one last time before stilling completely. Slowly, the dust cleared, dissipating in the echoing silence. Sunlight streamed through the gaping hole in the roof. Morguase stood unmoving before the throne, Uther laying at her feet, both of them completely unharmed. She was gazing at the pile of debris filling the middle of the room with manic triumph glinting in her red gold eyes.
“And so the mighty Emrys has fallen,” she sneered. “It seems the legend was greater than the man. Such is the way of things. Pity. He had so much potential.”
Morgana staggered forward to the edge of the rubble, trying to ignore Gwen’s quiet sobs. “No,” she whispered. “Merlin...Arthur...no, it can’t be!”
“Now you see the futility of resisting me, sister,” Morgause said coldly. “All those who stand against me, against magic, even the great Emrys himself, will fall before me, no matter their power. I will not be deterred. Join with me before it is too late. This is your last chance, sister.”
Tears streaming down her face, Morgana glared at the witch. “Nothing you say and nothing you do will ever convince me to join with your cruelty,” she spat, her voice trembling slightly with the weight of her tears. “Merlin was right. You and all those like you have done nothing but bring suffering to our people. I will never aid you in that!”
Morgause’s face hardened. Her eyes became stormy and red gold bled into her irises. “So be it. You have left me no other course of action. I wish that it did not have to be this way. We are kin, bound by blood after all. Good bye, sister.”
The witch raised her hand almost lazily. There was nothing Morgana could do. She had spent all her strength and even if she hadn’t, she did not possess the knowledge necessary to thwart Morgause. Morgana saw the witch’s lips move, but did not hear the spell she uttered. The sound of Gwen’s horrified cries filled her mind, drowning out all else. Refusing to show any fear, Morgana stared calmly at the woman before her and waited for death to whisk her into darkness.
It never did.
Before she could complete her deadly casting, something happened that drove all thoughts of killing Morgana from Mogause’s mind entirely. The debris from the ceiling began to glow. Bluish white light raced along the edges of the fallen stone. Every nook and cranny was slowly being illuminated.
Something touched Morgana’s mind and a familiar voice whispered, Stand back.
Even years of practice couldn’t keep the startled expression or the slowly growing smile that followed it off her face. Her heart was leaping for joy in her chest. Merlin was alive and if the magic before her was any indication, he was perfectly fine. Which meant that Arthur and Leon had to be as well. Merlin would never let harm come to them if he could help it. Everything was going to be all right.
Morgana slowly rose to her feet and stepped backward until she was once more level with Gwen. She wrapped an arm around her friend’s shaking shoulders and smiled reassuringly. The click that came as everything fell into place for Gwen was nearly audible. Her eyes widened and she looked to the glowing rubble, hardly daring to hope, hardly daring to even breathe.
So intent was Morgause on the now brightly glowing stones before her, that she noticed none of this.
A fine, dim glow spread across almost everything in the room, including the three women and Uther, as even the dust began to glow with the same blue white light. Morgause stepped back in barely concealed panic.
“Ic biddee þisne bealucræft áligean!” she incanted wildly. Her eyes gleamed and magic rippled out of her in a great, consuming wave. It did nothing. The glow that surrounded the stones only brightened marginally, as if it had absorbed her energy.
“What is this magic?” she whispered.
As though in answer, the rubble shifted ever so slightly before lifting gracefully into the air. The stones soared upward, twisting and spinning delicately, never once colliding, to fit themselves back into the ceiling. The great cracks that had extended down the walls like veins knit themselves back together, disappearing as though they’d never been there in the first place. Within seconds, every tine piece of stone, even the dust, had returned to its original place in the masonry, leaving three men standing in the center of the room as though nothing had happened to them. Arthur and Leon were still bound in chains -- Still hiding their true intentions, realized Morgana -- and Merlin’s eyes were blazing so brightly it almost hurt to look at him. Anger rolled off him in great bursts. Even though that fury wasn’t directed at her, Morgana shivered and gripped Gwen more tightly.
“That was not very kind,” Merlin said softly. The gold in his eyes dimmed and faded as he leveled an icy glare at Morgause. “Though I am curious as to why you thought that could kill me when Nimueh couldn’t manage that feat with a fireball straight to my chest.”
Morgause and Arthur both blanched, one in mild all-consuming terror at just what that revelation implied about Merlin’s power as a warlock, and the other in growing horror at what that revelation implied about what Merlin had endured in the past. If the situation hadn’t been so dire, Morgana might have laughed at the when-this-is-over-I-am-locking-you-in-the-dungeons-until-you-tell-me-everything glare that Arthur was leveling at Merlin’s back. She’d have to ensure she didn’t miss that. Not only did she want answers, but getting them would be quite a show.
Unaware of the reactions he was garnering -- or just blatantly ignoring them -- Merlin rambled on. “Of course that might have had something to do with the fact that we were in the middle of the Isle of the Blest and that minutes later I harnessed the Power of Life and Death to kill her in exchange for Gaius. I’m not entirely sure. What do you think?
Morgause gaped ungracefully at him before forcing a semi-confident smirk across her face that served only to make her look sick.
“You are more powerful that I guessed. Perhaps you are worthy of your legend after all. I admit that I may have been hasty in my judgement. You do not speak as one who is meant to usher in an age of magic. Prove me wholly wrong. Kill the Pendragon scion so that your destiny may be once step closer and so that Uther’s tyranny might not spread.”
A beat passed while the two mages regarded one another. Then Merlin snapped his fingers. The chains fell away from Arthur’s and Leon’s wrists and swords appeared at their sides. They drew them instantly.
“What are you doing?” Morgause demanded.
“Allowing my destiny one step closer,” he replied.
The witch’s jaw dropped. She snorted derisively. “You can’t possible think that Uther’s spawn is the once and future king! That’s ridiculous. It’s impossible!”
Merlin laughed hollowly. “You know, that was almost exactly my reaction when the Great Dragon first told me of my destiny. I thought Kilgarrah was mad. Mind you after twenty years of being locked in a cave with nothing but himself for company he might be, but he was right in this and in time I came to see that. Arthur’s a prat, don’t get me wrong, but he’s a kind, noble, and courageous prat who has the best interests of his people at hea--”
“You are deluding yourself,” she snapped. “He has killed dozens for possessing magic.”
“He had no one here to teach him otherwise! From the day he was born, Uther taught him the evils of magic and the only magic he ever saw was that of some desperate individual who tried to kill him or his father or completely destroy Camelot. Even I wouldn’t have a very favorable view of those with magic after that.”
“It is no excuse!”
“Is it not? Then what of his loyalty to his king, if not his father? Even as the crown prince, Arthur is first and foremost a knight. He is bound to obey the king. Disobeying blatantly only gets him into trouble and makes it more difficult to help others. It’s not as though Arthur’s personally ended the life of every sorcerer you would blame him for. Many of those whose blood you wish see on his hands tried to kill him! Only once did he go after innocent Druids and that was when he thought they had captured Morgana. And he had saved innocents before, such as the Druid boy, Mordered.
“He’s not perfect, I don’t pretend to say that. I don’t pretend to say that he has always accepted magic, but he does now. Now he can do something. Now we can fulfill our destiny! Already he had done what no noble should do by befriending and willingly sacrificing his life for a serva--”
“That does not mean he accepts magic,” Morgause shrieked hysterically. “Or that he ever will. Saving one boy in a moment of weakness proves nothing. He is no different than his father. You’ll see. When this is over and his precious kingdom is safe, he will turn on you. He will use you and then he will throw you aside like a piece of garbage.”
Arthur couldn’t contain himself any longer. “I will not! I’ve known about his magic for months and I don’t care!”
“Impossible. I know that he has been gone for--” she stopped abruptly. A malicious smirk blossomed into being on her face. “He sent you away. Rather than admit to himself and to Uther that a sorcerer had been so close to him for so long, he sent you away! What say you to that display of acceptance?”
“I’ll admit that I was angry, but it was because Merlin had been lying to me.” Arthur looked to Merlin as he spoke, not to Morgause. He seemed almost to be begging Merlin to understand. “It hurt knowing that you didn’t trust me and, even if I didn’t trust you the way I should have, you knew more of me than anyone else. I hated that it wasn’t the same for you. The magic was just an excuse. It didn’t even hit me until you left if the bloody whirlwind that your secret had been magic. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do after that. I hid behind my father’s teachings. I told myself that was why I sent you away, but I never once considered telling father. I wouldn’t do that.”
Merlin smiled slightly, a look of understanding on his face, as though he knew that that had been weighing Arthur down for months and that only the danger threatening Camelot has prevented him from saying so sooner.
“If you believe that you are a fool,” Morgause hissed, breaking the moment. The tension in the hall skyrocketed once more.
“If you do not, then you are an even greater one,” sighed Merlin. “I tell you that he is the once and future king. The only way magic will return to Camelot as you wish it to is if you allow destiny to take it’s place. Arthur will bring peace back to Camelot. It will flourish under his reign. There will be no injustice that he can prevent. Magic will work alongside those without. You cannot stop this, Morgause.”
She smirked. “We’ll see about that.”
The doors to the hall flew open and two dozen sorcerer’s poured in. The circled the room, surrounded Merlin, Arthur, and Leon. Merlin gazed at them dispassionately.
“So this is what it comes to?” he asked. “Magic against magic. It doesn’t have to be this way, Morgause. I wish you could see that.”
“This is the only way,” she said. Without warning, she darted forward and seized Uther from where he lay at the foot of the throne. She heaved him into her arms, producing a dagger from nowhere.
“It ends here! We shall fear no more. Magic shall retu--”
She never finished. With a minute twitch of his fingers, Merlin sent the dagger flying from her hand and blasted her across the room. She hit one of the columns that supported the roof and slumped to the ground, unconscious. With another twitch of his fingers, Merlin slowed the king’s fall and lowered him gently onto the ground. The other sorcerer’s stared at him in horror.
Merlin gazed at them. “I’m giving you one chance to do the wise thing and walk away. This is not the way to gain peace. You are doing nothing but harming your cause. Do not listen to the poison Morgause has been feeding you. Walk away. Bide your time. One day soon, when destiny is ready, magic will return.”
“We have waited too long,” snarled one. His answer seemed to embolden the others. They began jeering and yelling. Bolts of magic sped across the room. Merlin deflected them easily, absorbing them into his own magic. Eventually the sorcerers noticed that their spells were have no effect. They gathered together and chanted together. A sphere of roiling black energy materialized over their joined hands. It hovered there for a moment before speeding toward Merlin.
He did not speak a word. A massive golden dragon burst into life out of nowhere and swallowed the dark energy. It soared out the window and high into the sky where it imploded in on itself. A hollow BOOM echoed through the air.
“Onswebban.”
At that single word, all of the sorcerers keeled over and fell to the ground. Morgause struggled to her feet.
“You killed your own kin,” she whispered icily.
“They’re only asleep.”
“You have proven yourself to be our enemy. I will not forget this, Merlin Emrys. You will pay for this treachery. I swear it on my magic!”
And then she was gone. Whisked away by the same spell she had used when her last attempt to take Camelot had failed. Merlin sighed and his shoulders fell, leaving him looking far more like Merlin than he had since he’d walked into the throne room dragging Arthur and Leon behind him.
“Well, that went better than I hoped.”
Arthur raised an eyebrow. “That was good?”
“She didn’t fight back,” said Merlin. “At least not much. I expected much more of a fight.”
“So did I,” admitted Leon. “Why do you think she didn’t?”
“Who knows. It may be that she recognized how strong I am, or maybe she does know what destiny is and is simply refusing to admit it. Whatever the reason, I’m glad she gave us no more trouble than she did.”
“If you call having massive amounts of stone fall on your head no trouble, then it was wonderful,” Arthur grumbled.
Letting out a strangled sob, Gwen suddenly pelted across the room and threw her arms around Arthur’s neck. He wrapped her in a strong embrace even as she sobbed onto his shoulder. After everything that had happened the past few days, Arthur found he really couldn’t care less that she was just a servant and that others might not approve of their feelings for one another. Merlin was just a servant and he was the most powerful warlock ever born. What did it matter what station they were?
“I thought you were dead,” she gasped.
Arthur held her tighter. “It’s all right. See? I’m right here. I’m perfectly all right.”
“The ceiling fell on you! It should have crushed you!” cried Gwen a bit hysterically.
“How did you survive that?” asked Morgana, who’d walked over to them a bit more sedately, if only because she didn’t think her knees would support her if she tried to run as Gwen had.
As one, Leon and Arthur pointed to Merlin, who blushed slightly. “I’m not entirely sure what I did,” he admitted. “I meant to just move us somewhere else. Maintaining a shield for that long under that sort of weight would have been difficult and it would have encouraged Morgause to start throwing curses at us. Anyway, I think I ended up turning us into spirits or something. We just sort of ended up floating until she stopped the debris and...well, you saw the rest.”
“That’s amazing,” Gwen whispered. “I had no idea you were so powerful.”
Merlin smiled wryly. “Even I don’t know how powerful I am, Gwen. It seems that my power grows every day. I’m constantly surprising myself.”
“It’s still amazing,” said Morgana.
“It most certainly is,” Leon agreed.
Arthur rolled his eyes. “Yes, yes. Merlin is a wonderful warlock. I think we all get the point. What are we going to do about this lot?” He gestured to the men sleeping peacefully on the floor. “We can’t just leave them here and we can’t let them go.”
“We can’t imprison them either,” said Merlin. He got no further before Arthur puffed up indignantly.
“What do you mean? They attacked Camelot! They were working for Morgause!”
“She gave them hope, Arthur. If I was as desperate as they are, I might listen to her. I’m sure some of them are genuine threats, but some of them probably have families they just want to keep safe. You know how manipulative Morgause is. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s completely messed with their heads!”
Morgana’s eyes widened. “Can you use magic for that?”
“I’m not sure. I suppose it’s possible, but you would have to be very skilled. The mind is a delicate thing.” He rubbed his temples tiredly. “I’ll ask Gaius. Knowing Morgause, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was doing something like that to convince people to listen to her.”
“As enlightening as this all is, this doesn’t tell me what to do with them,” Arthur sighed, trying not to show how much the idea that some of those lying before him might not wish him ill after all gave him hope for his kingdom.
They all turned to Merlin. He glared good-naturedly. “Right, of course. Now that I’m the might warlock, you actually listen to me. Thanks ever so.”
“Just answer the question, Merlin. I’m sure that sleeping draught Morgana slipped father won’t last much longer.”
“How did you know about that?” Morgana demanded, looking put out that her plan had been discovered.
Arthur shrugged. “What else were you going to do to make sure father didn’t find out about Merlin? You can pout later. What are we going to do, Merlin?”
He rubbed his temples again and answered slowly. “Get Uther out of here. If he wakes up, stall him. I’m going to see if I can find any evidence of spell work on them. But I think that’s probably unlikely. Once I’m sure, I’ll remove any memory they have of Morgause and send them to a nearby village. It’s the best I can do.”
“You’re just going to let them go?” asked Leon.
“Do you have a better answer? Some of them could be innocent in all of this, just caught up by Morgause’s fanaticism. She does craft a convincing picture of peace and magic, doesn’t she? Even though she’d be a crueler queen than Uther ever was.”
“I don’t like it,” said Arthur, “but you’re right. We can’t condemn them to death because of her and if they stay here that is exactly what father will do when he wakes.”
“Hopefully they’ll remember this the next time they want to attack Camelot,” said Leon grimly.
Arthur nodded. Then he sighed and started toward the king. “Help me get father up to his room and then you and Gwen can go free the others from the dungeons while Morgana and I keep father in bed,” he said to Leon.
The two knights gently hoisted the king into their arms and carried him out of the hall. Gwen and Morgana followed after them, but Morgana paused in the doorway to look back at Merlin. He was already bent over one of the sorcerers, his eyes closed in concentration. Something stirred in her chest at the sight of him. A blush rose to her cheeks and she hurried after the others.
***
After what seemed like hours, but was in reality only a few minutes, Merlin had finished. He’d found no magic on the sorcerers beyond what they themselves had cast, so Morgause wasn’t controlling them, at least, not by magic. He was sure her sweet words of revenge had poisoned them.
Reluctantly, he whispered the spell that would wipe all memory of her from their minds. He worried that they would forget something important that was only marginally connected with Morgause. The book that he’d found this spell in had warned that it was not a subtle spell. But it was the only plan he had.
Once he was done, he summoned the last of this strength and sent them away to a town four days ride from Camelot where he knew they would found and tended to.
Merlin checked the room for any other signs of magic. On second thought, he added a few scorch marks. It would have to look authentic if Arthur was going to convince his father that they’d managed to defeat Morgause. That done, he slipped through the castle to the king’s chambers and knocked on the door.
“Enter,” called Arthur.
“I’d best not. Can you spare a moment?”
The door opened almost immediately and both Arthur and Morgana slipped out.
“What is it?” Arthur asked worriedly.
“Nothing,” Merlin rushed to assure him. “I just need to leave.”
Morgana looked taken aback. “Why?”
“Because we’ve no way to explain why I’m suddenly back.”
“That’s easy. You tired of Ealdor and confronted your issues with the dragon’s attack and decided to come back.”
“Won’t it look suspicious that I returned right after you managed to defeat Morgause after being dragged into a room, bound by a sorcerer? The last thing I need is Uther suspicious of me.”
Arthur did not seem happy, but he couldn’t deny Merlin’s logic either. “I suppose you’re right. How long would be gone?”
“A few weeks. I need to arrange things at Bardwell for my departure and give all of this time to blow over. But I will be back. You can’t keep me away now.” He grinned broadly. “This is my home.”
“Good,” said Arthur, clapping a hand on Merlin’s shoulder. “I expect to see you back here by the end of the month, with an excellent excuse for why you were gone so long. I’m sure you’ve had plenty of practice coming up with stories like that.”
“Use the mirror if anything happens before I return. I won’t hesitate.”
“I will,” Arthur promised, which surprised Merlin, who’d expected the prince to insist that he could handle everything on his own. He smiled quickly.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” he warned playfully. “I’m not here to protect you.”
“I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” Arthur huffed, but his eyes were twinkling.
Morgana watched the entire exchange in amusement. It was hard to believe, sometimes, just how close Arthur and Merlin had become. They had broken every taboo between them. Arthur was a prince and Merlin was a servant, yet they were friends of the closest kind. Merlin insulted and talked back to Arthur, who actually listened to him. Arthur was a soldier and Merlin was decidedly not, yet they were both fiercely protective of those they cared about and fought side by side. Arthur was the son of Uther and Merlin was a warlock, yet that seemed to have brought them even closer together. It was truly remarkable.
She drew herself out of her thoughts to see Merlin rummaging in a bag he’d produced from somewhere. After a moment, he produced an old, leather bound book which he handed to Morgana.
“This is the magic book Gaius gave me,” he said. “It’s pretty simple, but if you work through it, the spells will help you learn to control your magic. Just use the first few pages. I’ll help you after that, if you want me to.”
Clutching the book to her chest with one hand, Morgana impulsively leaned forward to kiss Merlin’s cheek. “I would most certainly like that. Thank you.”
He blushed crimson and babbled incoherently. Arthur looked between them, a speculating expression on his face. A bellow sounded from in the king’s chambers. Arthur sighed.
“Father’s awake. We’d best go to him and you’d best get out of here.”
Merlin nodded. “I’ll see you soon,” he promised. He inclined his head to them both in a sign of respect he rarely gave without sarcasm and which meant all the more when he was sincere, before turning down the corridor and striding out of sight.
Arthur gazed after him. “I never believed in all of that destiny stuff,” he said quietly. “I’d heard it all of my life. It was my destiny to be king, to succeed my father, to be a great ruler, to carry on his legacy. They always said that my path was all laid out, but I always thought it was my hard work that would make me all of those things. After listening to Merlin talk to Morgause, I think I might believe in destiny after all.”
“I think it’s a bit of both,” said Morgana. “The path may lie before you, but you have to chose to take it and you have to work for every step. Once you get to the end, destiny is all the sweeter because you earned it.”
For a moment, they stood in silence, contemplating destiny and what it meant for them. Another shout from the king drew them from their thoughts. Arthur sighed and opened the door for Morgana. She paused in the threshold to smile at him and they both knew in that instant that the destiny Merlin spoke of would be every bit as glorious as he said.