UKWELYLKJT
Goodness gracious, let me see.
At about 5:00 yesterday, the Uconnians arrived at home. The evening was set to begin. We had created a mental checklist (somebody may have had an actual checklist, but I don't remember whether or not it was about something else). This list was prepared before Kyle arrived, and contains the tasks we had organized/activities we planned on doing so we could have a game plan for the rest of the evening (the tasks we carried out are marked with a "*"):
1. Buy Kyle a present. *
2. Buy cake mix and frosting to bake Kyle a cake. *
3. Buy necessary ingredients to make nachos. *
4. Bake cake.
5. Make nachos.
6. Set up Gamecube for SSBM session. *
7. Have a SSBM session.
8. Watch a movie. *
9. Make sure Kyle is coming to Brookfield. *
10. Make sure Kyle will actually be able to do something this time. *
11: Make sure Kyle gets to my house. *
12: Hug Kyle. *
Andrea came first, then Kyle (we had him to ourselves for about ten minutes!), then Kevin, then Jenabay (whose car we saw slow down in front of my house for a second before moving on, then pulling into my driveway from the other direction a few minutes later. Gawd. Cute). Everybody saw my pets, and we decided to go out to eat. We let Kyle decide. Kyle picked Friendly's. We piled into his car and rode into the night.
I'd like to interrupt myself here by quickly adding that Kyle's "cover" (a stupid way of saying "hat") is surprisingly heavy. He can't wear it inside, or even in a car! Can you believe that!?
It was when we were walking through the parking lot to go in the restaurant where I realized how odd it felt, and how odd it must have looked, to see Kyle there in uniform with us. People looked at him differently. In a good way, but he still appeared to be uncomfortable with it somehow. We were seated and our waiter seemed to get slightly flirtatious with him. What clinched it for me was when Kyle and I both ordered root beers and Kyle's was slightly more filled than mine. Asshole. The waiter, I mean. We all got ice cream and stuff, and Kevin's spoon was far too long for his traditional banana split-style ice cream dish. Kevin and Andrea's ice cream clown things both had normal spoons. Asshole. The waiter, I mean. At one point, Jenabay talked about funny ways to grip her spoon, and I tried gripping mine all funny with my pinky and using my thumb as a lever. She laughed really hard for a minute. Then she said, "Simple machines!" and we all started laughing again. That was fun!
Here's a cool thing I did. On the way back, I told Kyle to pull into Shop Rite, and had him wait in the car while we all went in. He called us from outside and requested a ginger ale. I bought him one, but that wasn't what I went in there for. Sticking to the plan, I bought him a six-pack of IBC root beer (the best kind. We love that shit) and surprised him with it in the parking lot. We ran to him. Ann leaped into his arms and hugged him. Kyle dropped her. It didn't look like it hurt too bad. He liked the root beer.
We got back to my house and put on A Mighty Wind, which everyone but Kyle had seen. Nobody but Kyle and I (and Castelino, who wasn't there) liked root beer, so we got it to ourselves. We opened ours both at once and said "cheers" and clinked the bottles together. That was awesome. I don't know if I can explain why, but it was just SO AWESOME. It made me wish Brandon were there. I can call Kyle my best friend, but not without adding that Brandon is, too. It's a three-part thing. It doesn't work completely without all three of us. Still, just being there and doing that bottle thing with Kyle was bliss in its own charming way. He liked A Mighty Wind.
We showed him the Tom Hanks music video, the awful Zelda WoG and FoE videos, and some flipbooks Ann and Kevin had made. He liked them, too.
There was one point during the night where we were in my room, and I just lay there on my bed and stopped talking for a few minutes. I couldn't move or say anything. It wasn't anything to worry about, but I must have looked stupid or sad or both. Really, I was just in shock of how good everything was all of a sudden. It all clicked at that moment. It's amazing how somebody can be gone for a quarter of a year (wow, it's really been that long!) and make it seem as though he'd never left within seconds of seeing him again. It was back to old times before I could process it. I can't describe how great that felt; to be able to let go of every anxiety and fear I have, and just escape, without any consequence (so you don't think I'm going to become a heroin addict somewhere down the road), into what I forgot I had.
Did I really forget? Did I really think this went away? How the hell could I let myself do that? It's hard sometimes to remember that distance doesn't change things when a connection is strong enough. I've felt it. Distance is nothing. But God, so much love in that room! It was so natural and normal. It makes me doubly appreciative of the good people in my life, because I don't have to consciously try to keep them with me. It's automatic. They're there. There's something else keeping us together, and whatever it is, it's astoundingly beautiful.
I'll see Kyle again next week, along with Brandon. The Jellyphonics will finally be united. Plus, I'm probably going to Uconn tomorrow.
Are things getting better? Holy Mother of God, they just may.
At about 5:00 yesterday, the Uconnians arrived at home. The evening was set to begin. We had created a mental checklist (somebody may have had an actual checklist, but I don't remember whether or not it was about something else). This list was prepared before Kyle arrived, and contains the tasks we had organized/activities we planned on doing so we could have a game plan for the rest of the evening (the tasks we carried out are marked with a "*"):
1. Buy Kyle a present. *
2. Buy cake mix and frosting to bake Kyle a cake. *
3. Buy necessary ingredients to make nachos. *
4. Bake cake.
5. Make nachos.
6. Set up Gamecube for SSBM session. *
7. Have a SSBM session.
8. Watch a movie. *
9. Make sure Kyle is coming to Brookfield. *
10. Make sure Kyle will actually be able to do something this time. *
11: Make sure Kyle gets to my house. *
12: Hug Kyle. *
Andrea came first, then Kyle (we had him to ourselves for about ten minutes!), then Kevin, then Jenabay (whose car we saw slow down in front of my house for a second before moving on, then pulling into my driveway from the other direction a few minutes later. Gawd. Cute). Everybody saw my pets, and we decided to go out to eat. We let Kyle decide. Kyle picked Friendly's. We piled into his car and rode into the night.
I'd like to interrupt myself here by quickly adding that Kyle's "cover" (a stupid way of saying "hat") is surprisingly heavy. He can't wear it inside, or even in a car! Can you believe that!?
It was when we were walking through the parking lot to go in the restaurant where I realized how odd it felt, and how odd it must have looked, to see Kyle there in uniform with us. People looked at him differently. In a good way, but he still appeared to be uncomfortable with it somehow. We were seated and our waiter seemed to get slightly flirtatious with him. What clinched it for me was when Kyle and I both ordered root beers and Kyle's was slightly more filled than mine. Asshole. The waiter, I mean. We all got ice cream and stuff, and Kevin's spoon was far too long for his traditional banana split-style ice cream dish. Kevin and Andrea's ice cream clown things both had normal spoons. Asshole. The waiter, I mean. At one point, Jenabay talked about funny ways to grip her spoon, and I tried gripping mine all funny with my pinky and using my thumb as a lever. She laughed really hard for a minute. Then she said, "Simple machines!" and we all started laughing again. That was fun!
Here's a cool thing I did. On the way back, I told Kyle to pull into Shop Rite, and had him wait in the car while we all went in. He called us from outside and requested a ginger ale. I bought him one, but that wasn't what I went in there for. Sticking to the plan, I bought him a six-pack of IBC root beer (the best kind. We love that shit) and surprised him with it in the parking lot. We ran to him. Ann leaped into his arms and hugged him. Kyle dropped her. It didn't look like it hurt too bad. He liked the root beer.
We got back to my house and put on A Mighty Wind, which everyone but Kyle had seen. Nobody but Kyle and I (and Castelino, who wasn't there) liked root beer, so we got it to ourselves. We opened ours both at once and said "cheers" and clinked the bottles together. That was awesome. I don't know if I can explain why, but it was just SO AWESOME. It made me wish Brandon were there. I can call Kyle my best friend, but not without adding that Brandon is, too. It's a three-part thing. It doesn't work completely without all three of us. Still, just being there and doing that bottle thing with Kyle was bliss in its own charming way. He liked A Mighty Wind.
We showed him the Tom Hanks music video, the awful Zelda WoG and FoE videos, and some flipbooks Ann and Kevin had made. He liked them, too.
There was one point during the night where we were in my room, and I just lay there on my bed and stopped talking for a few minutes. I couldn't move or say anything. It wasn't anything to worry about, but I must have looked stupid or sad or both. Really, I was just in shock of how good everything was all of a sudden. It all clicked at that moment. It's amazing how somebody can be gone for a quarter of a year (wow, it's really been that long!) and make it seem as though he'd never left within seconds of seeing him again. It was back to old times before I could process it. I can't describe how great that felt; to be able to let go of every anxiety and fear I have, and just escape, without any consequence (so you don't think I'm going to become a heroin addict somewhere down the road), into what I forgot I had.
Did I really forget? Did I really think this went away? How the hell could I let myself do that? It's hard sometimes to remember that distance doesn't change things when a connection is strong enough. I've felt it. Distance is nothing. But God, so much love in that room! It was so natural and normal. It makes me doubly appreciative of the good people in my life, because I don't have to consciously try to keep them with me. It's automatic. They're there. There's something else keeping us together, and whatever it is, it's astoundingly beautiful.
I'll see Kyle again next week, along with Brandon. The Jellyphonics will finally be united. Plus, I'm probably going to Uconn tomorrow.
Are things getting better? Holy Mother of God, they just may.