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What I discover on the internet. More Interviews (Yeah, I am slow on those, STFU). I fucking love you, Skwisgaar.
Dethklok's Skwisgaar Skwigelf
He's the English-torturing Swedish death metaller from Metalocalypse and the fastest guitarist alive. Plus, his fingers are insured for $1 billion - apiece! But what Guitar World readers really want to know is...
Your lead tone is amazing, especially your riffs in the "Dethklok Detheme." What's the key to your tone?
-Leah Morgan
Yeah, Leah, goods to knows you gots goods taste and a great ear. For de guitars I use a Gibson Explorers with a Kranks Revolutions, EMG-81s and 85s, And sometimes I simplys "directs line" with a Line 6 PODxt for de leads and sweeps gargeggios. I also use de MXR pedals and de Dunlops wah pedal and stuffs. Oh, and dere is a Whammys Pedal on dats, too! I guess you could say dats I'm a bits of a gear whore.
You're the "fastest guitarist alive." How did you get that title, and are you worried about all the young shredders who are trying to take it from you?
-John Clapper
Yeah, dat was a title givens to me by Noble Prize-winning super-scientists. Ands hey, whatever, it's don'ts means much to me. Though it really gets under Toki's [Wartooth, Dethklok rhythm guitarist] skin - who ams a, let's face it, sloppys player. But dats makes me giggles to sees him so mad.
And hey, I'm sure dere ams little goofball dildos out dere who ams fasters players dan me, but deeps down underneath they are really bad people. And they hates demsselves, and I just feel sorrys for dems. But good for dems for tryings so hard to play fast. If dat's whats dey needs to gets through the day...
You always have your Gibson Explorer in your hands. What is your typical practice regimen?
-Brent Thompson
If you wants to know hows to practice and be as greats as me, do exactly whats I do: First gives your guitar a names and a hat and some pants and a credit cards and a bank account. Den go online and checks your MySpace account about a billions times. Dens makes a sandwhich and eats it and throws it up. Dens puts Tobasco sauce in your eyes. Dens set your face on fire. Den go watch de Pauls Gilbert's Intense Rock video. And dens practice yours pickings, because it's easy to lets de pickings get sloppy. So do dat exactly. Or you will not improve. Sorry.
What inspired you to first pick up a guitar? And how old were you?
-Conrad Oystein
I was 10 years olds in the Swedens winter. I was beings chased by wolves, and I fell into a cave. In dat cave I founds an old guitar caked in mud near de bones of an ancients warrior. I slammeds it down and de mud fell off. De pickups was still goods, but it needed somes new strings. At dats moments I knew dat dis relashonips would last forevers.
What is your most important piece of gear, and why?
-Dennis Swayze
My most unportants piece of gear is a goods breakfast and a greats attitude. And a string. De low one. De E. In metals, dats gets de most use, 'cause it's lows and heavys. Dethklok tunes down to C usually, buts not alsways. And de Dunlop Jazz III picks.
Dethklok fans are an infamously devoted bunch. What's the craziest thing a fan has done to show support?
-Trish McAleer
Ones time, dese ladies makes for me some pants made of ****. Dat's pretty crazy!
I heard you guys were releasing a CD and DVD this fall. Any truth to that?
-Eric Donnely
Dat's very true. Yeah The Dethalbum is comings out Dethtember 25 - dat's whats hows we calls Septembers 25. Full-length songs and nevers-before-heard new tracks, toos! It's got a whole bunch of cools stuff. We managed to recover some of de songs dats [Dethklok singer] Nathans Explosion deleted, including "Thunderhorse" dats you may know from Guitar Hero II. And we has some stuff from de Underwater Albums, too! But it's turneds outs nice and heavys, I gots to say.
I hear a lot of Death and Morbid Angel influence in your work. What artists inspire you?
-Terrance Eichelberger
Oh, so many. Yes, so much metal out dere is great. And dere ams so many great styles of metal out dere dat ams great, too - like Pantera, Dimmu Borgir, Arch Enemy, Nevermore, Strapping Young Lad, Exodus, Steely Dan, Emperor, King Diamond, Slayer, Metallica, Megadeth, Behemoth, Blue Oyster Cult, Amon Amarth, Cannibal Corpse, Chicago, Nile, Rogers and Hammerstein, Gorgoroth - sooo many dats my brains can't remembers alls of dems at once.
Dethklok is definitely a brutal band, but so were the Norwegian black metal bands like Burzum, Emperor and Mayhem. Do you think it's too extreme to make necklaces out of pieces of human skulls?
-Jon Weber
I happens to thinks that most jewelry is a bits extreme. Somestimes it just a littles too much. Makes you looks overdone, likes you're tryings too hard.
I likes a lady who ams naturaly beautiful, not flaunting chunks of skulls on a string like a stupid show-off...whos I would still haves sex with anyway. Does dats answers your question?
If you could play with any three guitarists - living or dead - who would you pick, and why?
-Anthony Grimes
I picks three living guitarists. Who wants to play with dead guys? Dey woulds just lay theres anysway.
Does dey all have to be guitarists? Just sounds likes a lots of egos to deals with. Cans one of dems just be a hots naked lady who has gones insane from horniness? Buts havings said dat, how's about Brian May, Bill Cosby and Osama Bin Ladens - sos we cans traps him...with an old-fashioned mousetrap.
You have an amazing guitar collection, which includes the Swiss Army-tar, ant farm-itar, Gibson Excalliburtar, the Christ's cross guitar... What new axes do you have your eye on acquiring?
-Martin Aleph
I'm having a guitar builts of living whales blubber and a bald eagle, with jumbo frets and a Sixties-style taper neck with a P90 singles-coil in the neck and a Fudgsicle in the bridge.
And dere's de Arm-tar. I'm talks to Gibson abouts puttings frets into my right forearms, with EMGs under my actuals skin, so dats I can always play my Arm-tar whenevers I want! I'm alsos gonna tries to gets an amp installed into my stomach so dat I cans plugs my Arm-tar into my stomach and rocks out! But I don't know how we woulds mass-produce dat. I haves another invention called Fingers-Helmets to protects your fingers tips if your hands falls down the stairs.
Oh, but I also wants one of dems new Les Paul Classic Customs. Dems is pretty sweet! Also, Dethklok and Epiphone are working on the Dethklok Guitar, to be out soon!
Your Advanced Hand Finger Wizard Master Class pay-per-view event got kinda messed up by your allergy to cilantro. [Skwisgaar's face and hands swelled after he poured barbecue souce that contained cilantro on his hands.] What else are you allergic to? And do you think you'll ever give a lesson again?
-Carl Hodgkin
Actuallys, dere is a lessions on de Guitar World's CD-ROM this month where dat yous can leans it de solo form de "Dethklok Duncan Hills Coffee Jingle." So checks dat out! It will also be on de Metalocalpse DVD.
Buts I'm also alergics to dats wasabi stuff. It gives me fat-fingers disease, too, and burns my snostrals.
Your current home in Mordhaus is amazing and must have cost a lot of money. I'm wondering what you did to make ends meets before Dethklok got huge, and where did you live when you were a struggling musician?
-Terrell Moore
Yeah, times was tough. I hads a lot of crappy jobs. I was a receptionist fors a while at a law firm, but I got fired for accidentally smoking a large stacks of subpoenas when I rans out of rolling papers. De laws firm was so mad that theys forced me to sue myself.
You guys are living the good life. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage, and what is your craziest on-the-road story?
-Michael Thomson
My favorite drink is called de "Odin's Horse Tits on the Beach in Valhalla." It's fermented lingons berries, vermouth and rum, served from a petrified horse tit. I alsos must confess dat dems wine coolers is pretty awesomes, toos.
Craziest on-de-road story is when we was in Japan and fought a gigantic radiosactive lizard-moster whos could breath fires. Dats wasn't de crazy part; de crazy part was dat I lost my wallets and a really goods Samaritans founds it and gaves it back to me. Dat's kinda crazys, don't you thinks?
Dethklok's Skwisgaar Skwigelf
He's the English-torturing Swedish death metaller from Metalocalypse and the fastest guitarist alive. Plus, his fingers are insured for $1 billion - apiece! But what Guitar World readers really want to know is...
Your lead tone is amazing, especially your riffs in the "Dethklok Detheme." What's the key to your tone?
-Leah Morgan
Yeah, Leah, goods to knows you gots goods taste and a great ear. For de guitars I use a Gibson Explorers with a Kranks Revolutions, EMG-81s and 85s, And sometimes I simplys "directs line" with a Line 6 PODxt for de leads and sweeps gargeggios. I also use de MXR pedals and de Dunlops wah pedal and stuffs. Oh, and dere is a Whammys Pedal on dats, too! I guess you could say dats I'm a bits of a gear whore.
You're the "fastest guitarist alive." How did you get that title, and are you worried about all the young shredders who are trying to take it from you?
-John Clapper
Yeah, dat was a title givens to me by Noble Prize-winning super-scientists. Ands hey, whatever, it's don'ts means much to me. Though it really gets under Toki's [Wartooth, Dethklok rhythm guitarist] skin - who ams a, let's face it, sloppys player. But dats makes me giggles to sees him so mad.
And hey, I'm sure dere ams little goofball dildos out dere who ams fasters players dan me, but deeps down underneath they are really bad people. And they hates demsselves, and I just feel sorrys for dems. But good for dems for tryings so hard to play fast. If dat's whats dey needs to gets through the day...
You always have your Gibson Explorer in your hands. What is your typical practice regimen?
-Brent Thompson
If you wants to know hows to practice and be as greats as me, do exactly whats I do: First gives your guitar a names and a hat and some pants and a credit cards and a bank account. Den go online and checks your MySpace account about a billions times. Dens makes a sandwhich and eats it and throws it up. Dens puts Tobasco sauce in your eyes. Dens set your face on fire. Den go watch de Pauls Gilbert's Intense Rock video. And dens practice yours pickings, because it's easy to lets de pickings get sloppy. So do dat exactly. Or you will not improve. Sorry.
What inspired you to first pick up a guitar? And how old were you?
-Conrad Oystein
I was 10 years olds in the Swedens winter. I was beings chased by wolves, and I fell into a cave. In dat cave I founds an old guitar caked in mud near de bones of an ancients warrior. I slammeds it down and de mud fell off. De pickups was still goods, but it needed somes new strings. At dats moments I knew dat dis relashonips would last forevers.
What is your most important piece of gear, and why?
-Dennis Swayze
My most unportants piece of gear is a goods breakfast and a greats attitude. And a string. De low one. De E. In metals, dats gets de most use, 'cause it's lows and heavys. Dethklok tunes down to C usually, buts not alsways. And de Dunlop Jazz III picks.
Dethklok fans are an infamously devoted bunch. What's the craziest thing a fan has done to show support?
-Trish McAleer
Ones time, dese ladies makes for me some pants made of ****. Dat's pretty crazy!
I heard you guys were releasing a CD and DVD this fall. Any truth to that?
-Eric Donnely
Dat's very true. Yeah The Dethalbum is comings out Dethtember 25 - dat's whats hows we calls Septembers 25. Full-length songs and nevers-before-heard new tracks, toos! It's got a whole bunch of cools stuff. We managed to recover some of de songs dats [Dethklok singer] Nathans Explosion deleted, including "Thunderhorse" dats you may know from Guitar Hero II. And we has some stuff from de Underwater Albums, too! But it's turneds outs nice and heavys, I gots to say.
I hear a lot of Death and Morbid Angel influence in your work. What artists inspire you?
-Terrance Eichelberger
Oh, so many. Yes, so much metal out dere is great. And dere ams so many great styles of metal out dere dat ams great, too - like Pantera, Dimmu Borgir, Arch Enemy, Nevermore, Strapping Young Lad, Exodus, Steely Dan, Emperor, King Diamond, Slayer, Metallica, Megadeth, Behemoth, Blue Oyster Cult, Amon Amarth, Cannibal Corpse, Chicago, Nile, Rogers and Hammerstein, Gorgoroth - sooo many dats my brains can't remembers alls of dems at once.
Dethklok is definitely a brutal band, but so were the Norwegian black metal bands like Burzum, Emperor and Mayhem. Do you think it's too extreme to make necklaces out of pieces of human skulls?
-Jon Weber
I happens to thinks that most jewelry is a bits extreme. Somestimes it just a littles too much. Makes you looks overdone, likes you're tryings too hard.
I likes a lady who ams naturaly beautiful, not flaunting chunks of skulls on a string like a stupid show-off...whos I would still haves sex with anyway. Does dats answers your question?
If you could play with any three guitarists - living or dead - who would you pick, and why?
-Anthony Grimes
I picks three living guitarists. Who wants to play with dead guys? Dey woulds just lay theres anysway.
Does dey all have to be guitarists? Just sounds likes a lots of egos to deals with. Cans one of dems just be a hots naked lady who has gones insane from horniness? Buts havings said dat, how's about Brian May, Bill Cosby and Osama Bin Ladens - sos we cans traps him...with an old-fashioned mousetrap.
You have an amazing guitar collection, which includes the Swiss Army-tar, ant farm-itar, Gibson Excalliburtar, the Christ's cross guitar... What new axes do you have your eye on acquiring?
-Martin Aleph
I'm having a guitar builts of living whales blubber and a bald eagle, with jumbo frets and a Sixties-style taper neck with a P90 singles-coil in the neck and a Fudgsicle in the bridge.
And dere's de Arm-tar. I'm talks to Gibson abouts puttings frets into my right forearms, with EMGs under my actuals skin, so dats I can always play my Arm-tar whenevers I want! I'm alsos gonna tries to gets an amp installed into my stomach so dat I cans plugs my Arm-tar into my stomach and rocks out! But I don't know how we woulds mass-produce dat. I haves another invention called Fingers-Helmets to protects your fingers tips if your hands falls down the stairs.
Oh, but I also wants one of dems new Les Paul Classic Customs. Dems is pretty sweet! Also, Dethklok and Epiphone are working on the Dethklok Guitar, to be out soon!
Your Advanced Hand Finger Wizard Master Class pay-per-view event got kinda messed up by your allergy to cilantro. [Skwisgaar's face and hands swelled after he poured barbecue souce that contained cilantro on his hands.] What else are you allergic to? And do you think you'll ever give a lesson again?
-Carl Hodgkin
Actuallys, dere is a lessions on de Guitar World's CD-ROM this month where dat yous can leans it de solo form de "Dethklok Duncan Hills Coffee Jingle." So checks dat out! It will also be on de Metalocalpse DVD.
Buts I'm also alergics to dats wasabi stuff. It gives me fat-fingers disease, too, and burns my snostrals.
Your current home in Mordhaus is amazing and must have cost a lot of money. I'm wondering what you did to make ends meets before Dethklok got huge, and where did you live when you were a struggling musician?
-Terrell Moore
Yeah, times was tough. I hads a lot of crappy jobs. I was a receptionist fors a while at a law firm, but I got fired for accidentally smoking a large stacks of subpoenas when I rans out of rolling papers. De laws firm was so mad that theys forced me to sue myself.
You guys are living the good life. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage, and what is your craziest on-the-road story?
-Michael Thomson
My favorite drink is called de "Odin's Horse Tits on the Beach in Valhalla." It's fermented lingons berries, vermouth and rum, served from a petrified horse tit. I alsos must confess dat dems wine coolers is pretty awesomes, toos.
Craziest on-de-road story is when we was in Japan and fought a gigantic radiosactive lizard-moster whos could breath fires. Dats wasn't de crazy part; de crazy part was dat I lost my wallets and a really goods Samaritans founds it and gaves it back to me. Dat's kinda crazys, don't you thinks?