Care-Provider Irritations
Ah! Life goes on! Hiding in darkness does not make the world go away, but it does mean that when I pop up again I have a slew of issues to contend with that were just piling up.
For instance, one of my sister's service providers, "Amy," is starting to irritate the hell out of me. She keeps giving my sister unsolicited (and often wrong) medical advice (like don't take Vitamin C if you have diabetes, when actually-- government studies say the OPPOSITE!!!)
She also keeps having Erica call me over our mother's hysterics, which is not helpful. I'm getting tired of having phone calls of this nature. I'm finally to the point of needing to make an official complaint. I did that and hopefully at least the health advice is over with.
The other thing is that I don't like having my phone calls with my sister to include Amy on speaker phone! They don't always tell me it's a group thing, and so I feel so frustrated to not have privacy when talking about difficult issues with my sister.
Once, my sister called to tell me she was upset that our mother said, "My daughter is mentally retarded." My mother is in her 90s and doesn't know that "retarded" is now a bad word. Erica's right to be upset. And I explained that mom is behind the times, she wasn't trying to be hurtful (though that may not be entirely true-- hard to tell with my mother.) At one point, I said, "You know what would be funny? If when Mom said, "My daughter's retarded" if you (Erica) said, "... and my mother's a bitch!" I laughed to think of it-- and, surprise! Amy was on the line! And people who don't get the personal issues between my family might think I was being a bitch (and, okay, yeah-- but... Erica saying that would be hella funny to me.)
Point is-- Amy is trampling on "my territory" a little and I'm starting to resent it! I'm grateful that she steps in, but not when she steps OVER, if you gather my meaning. It's hard for my sister to keep "Care Providers" for long, because she is difficult to work with (and, believe me, I know-- why do you think I want my sister to have her own place next to me, not with me?) However, I'm still protective of the older sister I helped raise, and when Amy starts up shit that threatens her health or our relationship, my hackles go up FAST!
For instance, one of my sister's service providers, "Amy," is starting to irritate the hell out of me. She keeps giving my sister unsolicited (and often wrong) medical advice (like don't take Vitamin C if you have diabetes, when actually-- government studies say the OPPOSITE!!!)
She also keeps having Erica call me over our mother's hysterics, which is not helpful. I'm getting tired of having phone calls of this nature. I'm finally to the point of needing to make an official complaint. I did that and hopefully at least the health advice is over with.
The other thing is that I don't like having my phone calls with my sister to include Amy on speaker phone! They don't always tell me it's a group thing, and so I feel so frustrated to not have privacy when talking about difficult issues with my sister.
Once, my sister called to tell me she was upset that our mother said, "My daughter is mentally retarded." My mother is in her 90s and doesn't know that "retarded" is now a bad word. Erica's right to be upset. And I explained that mom is behind the times, she wasn't trying to be hurtful (though that may not be entirely true-- hard to tell with my mother.) At one point, I said, "You know what would be funny? If when Mom said, "My daughter's retarded" if you (Erica) said, "... and my mother's a bitch!" I laughed to think of it-- and, surprise! Amy was on the line! And people who don't get the personal issues between my family might think I was being a bitch (and, okay, yeah-- but... Erica saying that would be hella funny to me.)
Point is-- Amy is trampling on "my territory" a little and I'm starting to resent it! I'm grateful that she steps in, but not when she steps OVER, if you gather my meaning. It's hard for my sister to keep "Care Providers" for long, because she is difficult to work with (and, believe me, I know-- why do you think I want my sister to have her own place next to me, not with me?) However, I'm still protective of the older sister I helped raise, and when Amy starts up shit that threatens her health or our relationship, my hackles go up FAST!