High EQ vs. Creativity & Needed Risk-taking
Things settled down with Cat after a couple of days. Le sigh!
SO glad she'll be getting regular therapy at last soon!
Meanwhile, I came across this article that made me look at myself:
getpocket.com/explore/item/the-downsides-of-being-very-emotionally-intelligent
E.Q. is one's Emotional Quotient, and measures the traits of:
"... intrapersonal and interpersonal skills - in particular high adjustment, sociability, sensitivity, ethics, and prudence. Thousands of scientific studies have tested the importance of EQ in various domains of life, providing compelling evidence for the benefits of higher EQ with regards to work, health, and relationships. For example, EQ is positively correlated with leadership, job performance, job satisfaction, happiness, and well-being (both physical and emotional). Moreover, EQ is negatively correlated with counterproductive work behaviors, psychopathy, and stress proclivity."
(Whereas I.Q. measures logic and language to get one's "Intelligence Quotient".)
But having a high E.Q. doesn't make you perfect socially or psychologically.
"Lower levels of creativity and innovation potential."
Creative people tend to be moody, nonconformist, slightly hostile or impulsive, and excitable, which are LOW E.Q. traits.
Despite those things, our world wouldn't be as wonderful without creative people constantly making content for the rest of us!
I've taken E.Q. tests before, and I score high on most measures except for the "calm/peaceful/not easily upset" measure.
And... I'm highly creative. Just privately I am constantly finding ways to banish reality and create my own inhabited worlds.
"Difficulty giving and receiving negative feedback."
High E.Q. people don't want to upset others, and they're so unflappable they don't pay much mind to negative reviews of them. Obviously, sometimes we need to be upfront about others' issues and able to hear others' issues with us and give a damn.
And... I pass that test!! I DO speak up when I find a problem with others (if it affects me, otherwise I'm "live and let live") and you readers know I get upset by criticism. I'll deal with the fair stuff, but the unfair judgments tweak me out because of how my parents gaslit me.
Making unpopular but necessary decisions.
High E.Q. types don't want to ruffle feathers and will avoid taking difficult steps in order to improve a situation that needs intervention. Which means they don't always make the best leaders, being better suited to assisting a more demanding leadership structure.
Once more, I realize that this is not my issue. When I am dissatisfied, I want to make things better, even if it hurts!
Again, many of you have borne witness to my many attempts to push or pull other people into feeling better and behaving better.
"An aversion to risk."
Once more, being super careful to always be ethical and care a great deal about others means most high E.Q. types take the safest roads and prefer to demur to consensus rather than shake things up. Usually this is fine, but in some circumstances it is very limiting.
I'm not sure where I place here... I am willing to take measured risks, especially if it's about creating a better TOMORROW at the possible expense of TODAY. But I am very nervous taking such steps and often anguished about it. And it's very easy for me to give up too soon.
Just some thoughts. I'm a weird combination of traits, and some I'm very proud of, but the driving force of FEAR in my approach to things is something I've been working to heal for a long time.
SO glad she'll be getting regular therapy at last soon!
Meanwhile, I came across this article that made me look at myself:
getpocket.com/explore/item/the-downsides-of-being-very-emotionally-intelligent
E.Q. is one's Emotional Quotient, and measures the traits of:
"... intrapersonal and interpersonal skills - in particular high adjustment, sociability, sensitivity, ethics, and prudence. Thousands of scientific studies have tested the importance of EQ in various domains of life, providing compelling evidence for the benefits of higher EQ with regards to work, health, and relationships. For example, EQ is positively correlated with leadership, job performance, job satisfaction, happiness, and well-being (both physical and emotional). Moreover, EQ is negatively correlated with counterproductive work behaviors, psychopathy, and stress proclivity."
(Whereas I.Q. measures logic and language to get one's "Intelligence Quotient".)
But having a high E.Q. doesn't make you perfect socially or psychologically.
"Lower levels of creativity and innovation potential."
Creative people tend to be moody, nonconformist, slightly hostile or impulsive, and excitable, which are LOW E.Q. traits.
Despite those things, our world wouldn't be as wonderful without creative people constantly making content for the rest of us!
I've taken E.Q. tests before, and I score high on most measures except for the "calm/peaceful/not easily upset" measure.
And... I'm highly creative. Just privately I am constantly finding ways to banish reality and create my own inhabited worlds.
"Difficulty giving and receiving negative feedback."
High E.Q. people don't want to upset others, and they're so unflappable they don't pay much mind to negative reviews of them. Obviously, sometimes we need to be upfront about others' issues and able to hear others' issues with us and give a damn.
And... I pass that test!! I DO speak up when I find a problem with others (if it affects me, otherwise I'm "live and let live") and you readers know I get upset by criticism. I'll deal with the fair stuff, but the unfair judgments tweak me out because of how my parents gaslit me.
Making unpopular but necessary decisions.
High E.Q. types don't want to ruffle feathers and will avoid taking difficult steps in order to improve a situation that needs intervention. Which means they don't always make the best leaders, being better suited to assisting a more demanding leadership structure.
Once more, I realize that this is not my issue. When I am dissatisfied, I want to make things better, even if it hurts!
Again, many of you have borne witness to my many attempts to push or pull other people into feeling better and behaving better.
"An aversion to risk."
Once more, being super careful to always be ethical and care a great deal about others means most high E.Q. types take the safest roads and prefer to demur to consensus rather than shake things up. Usually this is fine, but in some circumstances it is very limiting.
I'm not sure where I place here... I am willing to take measured risks, especially if it's about creating a better TOMORROW at the possible expense of TODAY. But I am very nervous taking such steps and often anguished about it. And it's very easy for me to give up too soon.
Just some thoughts. I'm a weird combination of traits, and some I'm very proud of, but the driving force of FEAR in my approach to things is something I've been working to heal for a long time.