(no subject)
the baby was my fathers. he didnt want to get it checked out when i found it with dozens of bumps on it's eyelid. i made him let me take the baby to the hospital. i told him how i live 5 minutes from the best childrens emergency room in the state. i wrapped the baby up, but he was so limp it was hard. once i dropped him on the couch (he was so small and dead-like.) the hospital didnt want to deal with him, at this time the rash was gone and he had started oozing blood then clear liquid from his temple, from a dark spot. i kept wiping it off, and it would disapear only to return again. the poor baby didnt sleep. they asked when he had last been fed and my dad went "oops, i forgot to give it dinner". but the baby didnt cry, it just slept. finally after hours, in which they made me take what seemed to be an iq test, i was told what was wrong. the baby had severe spikes in certain chromosomal levels in his blood. they didnt tell me anything else, just gave me the baby who i held in my arms (so small) who looked like he was dying already.
i want to cry. it was the most beautiful child. it was so perfect at three months old in my arms.
i want to cry. it was the most beautiful child. it was so perfect at three months old in my arms.