: : don't come the raw pr0n wih me : :
♦ Honey: Get rid of it.
Me: Oh noeZ! Not the pr0n!
Honey: Yes & I mean all of it. No hiding any of it on the sly.
me: But why?
Honey: I will not be explaining to American immigration, a lorry full of gay pornography.
me: Hey, it ain't all gay... some of it's lesbian!
Honey: It is not worth imagining what is in your collection Luc. Your appetite is vast.
me: How can you be suddenly so prudish, Honey? You're Dutch - you invented it!
Honey: And we are moving to America. You cannot chance their import officials to be as broadminded as us.
me: Yeah, I see where you're comin' from. So, can I at least keep one then?
Honey: Very well. If you select something... average.
me: Ip-dip, my spaceship, on a course so tru.
Honey: What are you doing?
me: Can't decide - Darn it! Now I gotta start agen...
Ip dip - my spaceship, on a course so tru.
Past Neptune & Pluto's moon, the - one - I - choose - is...
Honey: What's wrong?
me: Don't want that one.
Honey::twitches::
me::dawdles::
Honey::snaps:: For fuck's sake, pick one or I will do it for you.
me: Gottapickaporno or 2!
Honey: LUCA!
me: Okay, Okay... ah... this one!
Honey::crosses fingers:: Please let it be boring.
me: It's Prince Caspian
Honey: Why am I thinking this is not a chronicle of Narnia?
me: It's the story of a 19yr old boy's wild maritime adventures on an oilrig in the Caspian Sea!
Honey::grabs case:: But you hate East European porn, Luca. They yell Eww instead of Ohh & you roll on the floor roaring with laughter.
me: I want this one.
Honey::examines case carefully:: And you are certain there's nothing objectionable inside?
me: Nah, it's the hottest thing I own but they're all completely straighty-180!
Honey: It's a gay porn film isn't it? How do you figure that out?
me: Are you serious? Everyone knows you can't have gay guys on an oilrig!
Honey::frowns:: Why not?
me: They'd throw bread out to the helicopters!
Honey: ...
me: What?
Honey::incredulous:: It scares me that behind those twinkling eyes, you may actually believe that.
So anyone want a boatload of free pr0n? I've a veritable smorgasbord of smut - with treasures to satiate desires both subtle & gross. Hey, wait a sec... why give it away when I could make some dirty cashy money! I'll hold an X-rated garage sale! Hmm, but what to paint on the posters... ::launches Playwolf::