(no subject)
Wow! I haven't posted in ages! I got back from Canada mid-November and it's taken a while to settle back in to Shire living. It's been lovely to see everyone but I'm longing for the end of January when I go back and pick up my life again. So, what have I been up to? I got back home, saw the family then my friend Kinga (whose Australian but who I met in Canada) came to stay on the 28th November. She leaves tomorrow which is sad but part of me is quite looking forward to having my room back to myself. I'm going to miss her loads though.
I've had a pretty shitty few days. I got a job on my return in a new hotel/restaurant in town as floor manager for the restaurant. I have no training whatsoever for this job other than my own waitressing experience so I was a little nervous and anxious to do a good job. The chef in charge was a friend of my parents so I new him that way but not as a chef and how he likes to run his restaurant. He didn't give me a contract, job spec or any kind of training or talk about how he wanted things done before we opened. However, the waitstaff were really helpful in helping me find my feet and letting me know how he likes certain things done. We have been so busy doing Christmas dinners that I was training my new staff on the job and some of them are so young and it's their first job that I wished I could have made time for a training session for them but there just hasn't been the time. Anyway, I have been working 50 hours plus a week while still managing 2 days off so I got a little run down. Come New Year's Eve I had caught the flu thing that was circulating ans I was feeling pretty shit. I went in in the morning to set things up for the evening and to make sure things would run smoothly. I was confident in my servers that they would be able to run the show themselves as long as I set them all up and ready to go. At this point my boss decides to freak out and start shouting at me telling me that I lacked motivation, was morose and that I wasn't motivating my staff. This came out of no where I would like to say. I had frequently asked him whether I was running everything ok or if he had any problems and every time he would say no, I was doing a good job. He even told one of the other staff members that he was impressed with me and was grateful that I was there as I was the only one giving the staff any kind of training. So to suddenly decide to shout at me for the reasons I said was a little out of the blue. Already feeling unwell I got emotional and walked out to sit outside and try and compose myself. I've not been happy in the job but I am a compulsive perfectionist so I have been working hard to try and make sure that everything was done to a high standard. I went back in to talk to him rationally but he just went off on one again. I asked why he hadn't said anything in the previous 3 weeks or any time I asked if he felt things were going wrong and he didn't have any answer for that. I was intending to sit down with him after New Year's and hand in my 2 week notice anyway as I am heading back to Canada but instead I just quit then and there.
It's kind of knocked my confidence a bit and I can't stop going through my head and trying to work out what I did wrong. I don't understand any of the criticism. I am a workaholic, as many will attest to, and I am also, I admit this, a sickeningly cheerful person. I feel a bit beaten down which is not how I wanted to start the new year.
Anyhoo, sorry about the rambling. I did have a lovely Christmas and a fun time at New Year's (once I didn't have to work) with family and friends. Wishing everyone a Happy 2008!