Healing From the Grave
Title: Healing From the Grave
Author:
demon_rays
Fandom:Hyde, Gacktjob
Character/Pairing:Gackt, Hyde, You, Chachamaru
Prompt #:7 Rain by
demon_rays
Genre:Angst
Rating:PG-13 for Character death
Wordcount:1339
Synopsis: Three years after Gackt's passing, Hyde's guilt is resolved in the strangest way.
Hyde rested his head on his desk, as the storm reached its worst. It’s been raining for hours on end and it felt as if it would never stop. Rain was soothing at times…but when it’s raining as if a flood would be destined to form…it’s distressing. A day night like this, does nothing but bring memories you wouldn’t think of much.
One in particular wormed its way into the musician’s mind and refuses to leave him. It filled him with guilt, pain, and fury…it made Hyde seriously want to hate himself more then anything that walked the earth. So the thought of being reminded of the greatest sin he could ever commit, made him rather cranky and full of unneeded angst.
- - - - - - -
Three years earlier
“Haido,” Gackt called quietly, staring at the smaller man in the doorway to his house. Now that Hyde thinks about it, Gackt’s face was unusually gaunt, his breathing was off, and his skin was very pale and clammy…something was seriously off…why was he so stupid to not notice it? How could he not tell that the younger man’s voice was rattling, as if he swallowed a rock or two and they got stuck in.
“What is it?” he demanded, glaring at him. “Why is that after all this time, you decide to show up and speak to me?” The younger man stared at the floor, then stared dead into his eyes.
“I didn’t know how to tell you-I-“
“If you never wanted to speak to me again, why couldn’t you just say that?” Hyde asked, wanting to punch him.
“Please, you have to listen to me-“ Hyde slammed his door on his face. The taller man’s sobbing flowed through the door, slightly getting to the older man…but he made the very wrong choice to ignore him.
“I’m sorry Haido!” Gackt sobbed harshly…sounding worse then usual.
- - - - - -
Two months went by…and Hyde got a call that made his life worse then what it was.
“Haido, you need to listen to what I have to tell you.” You begged on Hyde’s cell.
“I have nothing to say to him.” Hyde snarled.
“It doesn’t matter now…you couldn’t say anything to him if you wanted!” You snapped. “Gakku’s no longer alive.”
“….What?” Hyde asked, losing his voice slowly. His body began to shake harshly…as the words sunk in.
“Gakku’s been trying to tell you all of this time…and you just wouldn’t listen.” The younger man continued, his voice shaking violently. “He wanted you to know more then anyone else. The last time you saw him…didn’t you notice how pale and unhealthy he looked?” Hyde leaned against the wall, unable to speak…the words he heard…they couldn’t be real…it was impossible. “Gackt was about to die…and with the last of his strength, he went to see you…and what did you do? You slammed the door on him and ignored you!” You shouted. “He called your name in his death bed…he begged for your forgiveness…why the fuck didn’t you just let him tell you that he was dying?!”
“I…I didn’t know…” Hyde barely managed to say in a choked whisper. “I was too angry….too upset to listen to him. He stopped talking to me and-“
“Gakku was in the hospital…and they wouldn’t let him speak to anyone…if you would have just let him tell you-just forget it!” You snarled, slamming his phone shut.
Hyde didn’t even realize that he was crying…until he felt something hot and wet slide down his neck.
- - - - -
Not liking the memory much anymore, the vocalist made the decision to go for a walk. Pulling his thin raincoat about him, Hyde strolled through the graveyard in silence. All the names and dates, caught his eye. Every now and then, the man would wonder…if they died in the same amount of pain Gackt did…if they suffered for someone’s ignorance.
When he found the grave he was searching for, Hyde knelt before it, reading the name over and over. In fancy English calligraphy…Gackt’s name was spelled largely across the marble headstone.
Hyde smiled sadly, tracing the smoothly cut letters with a finger. “Gacchan, I know what I did to you…was horrible…I’m sorry.” He whispered, resting his head on the stone. “It was so stupid of me. Why did I do that to you? If you never forgive me…well…I’ll understand. I just wish you went in a better manner. Why wasn’t I there for you when you needed it?”
“Stop beating yourself up.” A soft voice ordered from behind. The small man stood up, turning his head towards the source, with wide eyes.
“Gacchan?” he asked, his voice caught into a whisper. The younger man gave him a warm smile, the thick, heavy rain falling around him, leaving him completely dry.
“It’s alright, I’m not alone anymore….and I have nothing to suffer about.” He said gently, tilting his head. A nice suit clothed the healthy looking spirit, who stood before him so casually. “I forgave you…and I knew that you’d blame yourself…it’s not your fault Haido. You didn’t know…and I didn’t tell you well enough. It’s nothing to agonize over.”
“How the hell can you say that?!” Hyde demanded, choking down a sob the best way he could. “I cursed you, told you terrible things….You told me that you died crying for me…asking me for your forgiveness. I was supposed to be there!” The younger man’s eyes went to the ground as he sighed deeply.
“No you weren’t.” he corrected softly, stepping towards him. “Besides, it doesn’t matter anymore.”
“What?” Hyde asked, as pain shot through his left arm. Gackt watched, as the older man fell on his knees, gasping for air weakly.
“I didn’t just come here to comfort you.” He explained, over the smaller man’s weak gasps. Hyde sobbed in pain, clinging to his chest. His lungs felt as if they were being crushed by a car, his heart struggled to keep beating as he balled up in the muddy earth below him. “Gacchan!” He cried, reaching for him. Gackt continued to watch this, with slight pain his eyes.
“I wish I could make it easier to deal with…but I can’t do anything about that.” He said quietly.
“Gacchan…” Hyde tried again, before he fell lifelessly.
“Are you ready Haido?” Gackt asked quietly. Hyde sat up, and stared up at his visitor.
“For what?” he asked, before lightning flashed in their line of vision. His wide eyes, went to the body lying on his dear friend’s grave. His gaze met the empty ones that used to be his very own, before a piercing scream filled the grave yard.
“You’re surprised?” Gackt queried, tilting his head. “Did you not feel your heart stop?”
“It’s not funny Gackt!” The newly dead man snapped, standing up. “I can’t believe I just died like that!”
“You were supposed to…and matter of fact you’re a little past due.” The younger man snorted. “Your death was supposed to happen a year ago…what took you so long to pay me a visit?” Gackt asked, taking his hand. As they started walking, Hyde stared at the ground below them.
“I felt ashamed…I couldn’t forgive myself…and I felt that I had no right to see you.”
“Woow…that’s stupid.” Gackt mused, staring off into space.
“Shut up!” Hyde snapped, as they walked off into the next world.
- - - - - -
The next morning, You and Chachamaru were stunned at the sight that met them. Hyde’s body rested balled up under Gackt’s gravestone, his eyes staring blankly into space. “Oh my god…” You gasped, kneeling before him.
“He’s gone isn’t he?” The guitarist asked, feeling terrible to see such a thing.
“This is my fault…if I…if only I didn’t-“ You gasped, dropping the roses he held for his friend.
“You didn’t kill Haido.” The older man said, resting a hand on You’s shoulder. “Call the ambulance if you feel this badly.” You nodded, taking out his phone with shaking hands.
I still feel like something's missing. *Sighs in annoyance*
This is for the list 'o doom challenge
Author:
demon_rays
Fandom:Hyde, Gacktjob
Character/Pairing:Gackt, Hyde, You, Chachamaru
Prompt #:7 Rain by
demon_rays
Genre:Angst
Rating:PG-13 for Character death
Wordcount:1339
Synopsis: Three years after Gackt's passing, Hyde's guilt is resolved in the strangest way.
Hyde rested his head on his desk, as the storm reached its worst. It’s been raining for hours on end and it felt as if it would never stop. Rain was soothing at times…but when it’s raining as if a flood would be destined to form…it’s distressing. A day night like this, does nothing but bring memories you wouldn’t think of much.
One in particular wormed its way into the musician’s mind and refuses to leave him. It filled him with guilt, pain, and fury…it made Hyde seriously want to hate himself more then anything that walked the earth. So the thought of being reminded of the greatest sin he could ever commit, made him rather cranky and full of unneeded angst.
- - - - - - -
Three years earlier
“Haido,” Gackt called quietly, staring at the smaller man in the doorway to his house. Now that Hyde thinks about it, Gackt’s face was unusually gaunt, his breathing was off, and his skin was very pale and clammy…something was seriously off…why was he so stupid to not notice it? How could he not tell that the younger man’s voice was rattling, as if he swallowed a rock or two and they got stuck in.
“What is it?” he demanded, glaring at him. “Why is that after all this time, you decide to show up and speak to me?” The younger man stared at the floor, then stared dead into his eyes.
“I didn’t know how to tell you-I-“
“If you never wanted to speak to me again, why couldn’t you just say that?” Hyde asked, wanting to punch him.
“Please, you have to listen to me-“ Hyde slammed his door on his face. The taller man’s sobbing flowed through the door, slightly getting to the older man…but he made the very wrong choice to ignore him.
“I’m sorry Haido!” Gackt sobbed harshly…sounding worse then usual.
- - - - - -
Two months went by…and Hyde got a call that made his life worse then what it was.
“Haido, you need to listen to what I have to tell you.” You begged on Hyde’s cell.
“I have nothing to say to him.” Hyde snarled.
“It doesn’t matter now…you couldn’t say anything to him if you wanted!” You snapped. “Gakku’s no longer alive.”
“….What?” Hyde asked, losing his voice slowly. His body began to shake harshly…as the words sunk in.
“Gakku’s been trying to tell you all of this time…and you just wouldn’t listen.” The younger man continued, his voice shaking violently. “He wanted you to know more then anyone else. The last time you saw him…didn’t you notice how pale and unhealthy he looked?” Hyde leaned against the wall, unable to speak…the words he heard…they couldn’t be real…it was impossible. “Gackt was about to die…and with the last of his strength, he went to see you…and what did you do? You slammed the door on him and ignored you!” You shouted. “He called your name in his death bed…he begged for your forgiveness…why the fuck didn’t you just let him tell you that he was dying?!”
“I…I didn’t know…” Hyde barely managed to say in a choked whisper. “I was too angry….too upset to listen to him. He stopped talking to me and-“
“Gakku was in the hospital…and they wouldn’t let him speak to anyone…if you would have just let him tell you-just forget it!” You snarled, slamming his phone shut.
Hyde didn’t even realize that he was crying…until he felt something hot and wet slide down his neck.
- - - - -
Not liking the memory much anymore, the vocalist made the decision to go for a walk. Pulling his thin raincoat about him, Hyde strolled through the graveyard in silence. All the names and dates, caught his eye. Every now and then, the man would wonder…if they died in the same amount of pain Gackt did…if they suffered for someone’s ignorance.
When he found the grave he was searching for, Hyde knelt before it, reading the name over and over. In fancy English calligraphy…Gackt’s name was spelled largely across the marble headstone.
Hyde smiled sadly, tracing the smoothly cut letters with a finger. “Gacchan, I know what I did to you…was horrible…I’m sorry.” He whispered, resting his head on the stone. “It was so stupid of me. Why did I do that to you? If you never forgive me…well…I’ll understand. I just wish you went in a better manner. Why wasn’t I there for you when you needed it?”
“Stop beating yourself up.” A soft voice ordered from behind. The small man stood up, turning his head towards the source, with wide eyes.
“Gacchan?” he asked, his voice caught into a whisper. The younger man gave him a warm smile, the thick, heavy rain falling around him, leaving him completely dry.
“It’s alright, I’m not alone anymore….and I have nothing to suffer about.” He said gently, tilting his head. A nice suit clothed the healthy looking spirit, who stood before him so casually. “I forgave you…and I knew that you’d blame yourself…it’s not your fault Haido. You didn’t know…and I didn’t tell you well enough. It’s nothing to agonize over.”
“How the hell can you say that?!” Hyde demanded, choking down a sob the best way he could. “I cursed you, told you terrible things….You told me that you died crying for me…asking me for your forgiveness. I was supposed to be there!” The younger man’s eyes went to the ground as he sighed deeply.
“No you weren’t.” he corrected softly, stepping towards him. “Besides, it doesn’t matter anymore.”
“What?” Hyde asked, as pain shot through his left arm. Gackt watched, as the older man fell on his knees, gasping for air weakly.
“I didn’t just come here to comfort you.” He explained, over the smaller man’s weak gasps. Hyde sobbed in pain, clinging to his chest. His lungs felt as if they were being crushed by a car, his heart struggled to keep beating as he balled up in the muddy earth below him. “Gacchan!” He cried, reaching for him. Gackt continued to watch this, with slight pain his eyes.
“I wish I could make it easier to deal with…but I can’t do anything about that.” He said quietly.
“Gacchan…” Hyde tried again, before he fell lifelessly.
“Are you ready Haido?” Gackt asked quietly. Hyde sat up, and stared up at his visitor.
“For what?” he asked, before lightning flashed in their line of vision. His wide eyes, went to the body lying on his dear friend’s grave. His gaze met the empty ones that used to be his very own, before a piercing scream filled the grave yard.
“You’re surprised?” Gackt queried, tilting his head. “Did you not feel your heart stop?”
“It’s not funny Gackt!” The newly dead man snapped, standing up. “I can’t believe I just died like that!”
“You were supposed to…and matter of fact you’re a little past due.” The younger man snorted. “Your death was supposed to happen a year ago…what took you so long to pay me a visit?” Gackt asked, taking his hand. As they started walking, Hyde stared at the ground below them.
“I felt ashamed…I couldn’t forgive myself…and I felt that I had no right to see you.”
“Woow…that’s stupid.” Gackt mused, staring off into space.
“Shut up!” Hyde snapped, as they walked off into the next world.
- - - - - -
The next morning, You and Chachamaru were stunned at the sight that met them. Hyde’s body rested balled up under Gackt’s gravestone, his eyes staring blankly into space. “Oh my god…” You gasped, kneeling before him.
“He’s gone isn’t he?” The guitarist asked, feeling terrible to see such a thing.
“This is my fault…if I…if only I didn’t-“ You gasped, dropping the roses he held for his friend.
“You didn’t kill Haido.” The older man said, resting a hand on You’s shoulder. “Call the ambulance if you feel this badly.” You nodded, taking out his phone with shaking hands.
I still feel like something's missing. *Sighs in annoyance*
This is for the list 'o doom challenge