(no subject)
I am sick to death of everyone butting into my life and trying to tell me how to live! You're not God. And stop questioning me about what God tells me, or questioning my relationship with Him. Leave me the frick alone. Things were FINE. Devin and I are amazing, I love him so much. I thank God every chance I get. Maybe this is God testing me, or maybe this is people just interfering. I can't really tell yet. I know that I can make it through, whatever happens, because I do put God first, but that doesn't make this hurt any less, because for once, I didn't screw something up, and my boyfriend didn't screw up. It's other people telling me what to do.
Devin has been fighting with his parents, but it's not my fault. It's been going on since before I met him, and I know that's a fact because Travis and I talked about it when I first started hanging out with them. I've been telling Devin to not argue or get an attitude with them, and just go along with what they say, but it just seems to be a lose-lose situation because no matter what he does he gets in trouble. Whether it's for his attitude or when he agrees with them they say he's being "sarcastic" [which my step mom did to me too]. I just don't know what to do anymore, nothing seems to be working. I think we've both prayed about it, but no clear answer has arisen.
And today Devin stayed after school to see if he was making up his detention today or not, and he wanted to spend a little time with me since I wasn't allowed to come over because his counsler Mindy was coming over later. He told his mom he'd call her in a bit, and me and him were just talking and stuff, and she calls him, geeking out, demanding to know where he is and what he's doing and where I am--since Craig and Frankie were over at Devin's without me. He ends up hanging up on her, and his dad calls and he also hangs up on him, throwing his cell phone and slamming his fists against the wall... I tried to calm him down, but I really don't know how to. I called Scooter, asking him to come pick me up since Frankie and Craig left me, and my cell phone had died so I used Devin's.
We got outside and we're talking about how unfair his mom is being, freaking out about nothing, just cuz he's spending time with me where she can't closely watch us. And he said if it was Ashley, she wouldn't have cared, but since it's me, it's a huge deal. She probably still thinks God told her that Devin and Ashley belong together, and my youth pastor Sean said that God probably wouldn't tell HER that, but the people involved, so whatever. It's obvious how happy me and Devin are....
And so I get home and I text Ausha, asking her for help about Devin & Angie situation and she tells me I need to break up with Devin, "for her sake". Yeah, okay, not. Like it's not even her business anyway, she has no say in that. She can just stay out of it, I wasn't asking her about me and Devin, I was asking about Devin and their mom. Jeeze. So I text Troy and tell him I need someone to talk to, so I go up to the school and him and Emily pick me up and we talk as we drive to Warrenton, and we have a blast. We took Emily home and left around 7, then Troy took me to Subway and we talked and repaired our friendship, and through-out the day I'm texting Ausha, to which she mostly doesn't reply. The only thing she did say was to ask me if I really truly deeply prayed about me and Devin being together. Which I have. When Angie guilt tripped me the last time to break up with Devin, that's what I did, prayed about it, and I got the same freaking answer. The same freaking pull towards Devin, I couldn't stop thinking about him and that he needed me. That was the week of the winter retreat, and Devin said the whole weekend he prayed about us too and he couldn't stop thinking about me either. And it's not even someone else's place to question that. Not even. That's between me and God. And Devin and God.
And now Angie is telling me I have to break up with Devin. To "focus on God and put him first". Whatever, my life is on track. I can always improve in my relationship with God, I'm not saying that, but at the same time Devin isn't getting in the way of that. And it's not her place to say that it is. Why can't she just back off? She's the one not listening to God, I know I have been cuz things with Devin are so amazing.
I'm just so fed up. I'm not breaking up with him, dangit.
He's the second best thing that's happened to me.
The first, finding God.
Please someone help me.
Devin has been fighting with his parents, but it's not my fault. It's been going on since before I met him, and I know that's a fact because Travis and I talked about it when I first started hanging out with them. I've been telling Devin to not argue or get an attitude with them, and just go along with what they say, but it just seems to be a lose-lose situation because no matter what he does he gets in trouble. Whether it's for his attitude or when he agrees with them they say he's being "sarcastic" [which my step mom did to me too]. I just don't know what to do anymore, nothing seems to be working. I think we've both prayed about it, but no clear answer has arisen.
And today Devin stayed after school to see if he was making up his detention today or not, and he wanted to spend a little time with me since I wasn't allowed to come over because his counsler Mindy was coming over later. He told his mom he'd call her in a bit, and me and him were just talking and stuff, and she calls him, geeking out, demanding to know where he is and what he's doing and where I am--since Craig and Frankie were over at Devin's without me. He ends up hanging up on her, and his dad calls and he also hangs up on him, throwing his cell phone and slamming his fists against the wall... I tried to calm him down, but I really don't know how to. I called Scooter, asking him to come pick me up since Frankie and Craig left me, and my cell phone had died so I used Devin's.
We got outside and we're talking about how unfair his mom is being, freaking out about nothing, just cuz he's spending time with me where she can't closely watch us. And he said if it was Ashley, she wouldn't have cared, but since it's me, it's a huge deal. She probably still thinks God told her that Devin and Ashley belong together, and my youth pastor Sean said that God probably wouldn't tell HER that, but the people involved, so whatever. It's obvious how happy me and Devin are....
And so I get home and I text Ausha, asking her for help about Devin & Angie situation and she tells me I need to break up with Devin, "for her sake". Yeah, okay, not. Like it's not even her business anyway, she has no say in that. She can just stay out of it, I wasn't asking her about me and Devin, I was asking about Devin and their mom. Jeeze. So I text Troy and tell him I need someone to talk to, so I go up to the school and him and Emily pick me up and we talk as we drive to Warrenton, and we have a blast. We took Emily home and left around 7, then Troy took me to Subway and we talked and repaired our friendship, and through-out the day I'm texting Ausha, to which she mostly doesn't reply. The only thing she did say was to ask me if I really truly deeply prayed about me and Devin being together. Which I have. When Angie guilt tripped me the last time to break up with Devin, that's what I did, prayed about it, and I got the same freaking answer. The same freaking pull towards Devin, I couldn't stop thinking about him and that he needed me. That was the week of the winter retreat, and Devin said the whole weekend he prayed about us too and he couldn't stop thinking about me either. And it's not even someone else's place to question that. Not even. That's between me and God. And Devin and God.
And now Angie is telling me I have to break up with Devin. To "focus on God and put him first". Whatever, my life is on track. I can always improve in my relationship with God, I'm not saying that, but at the same time Devin isn't getting in the way of that. And it's not her place to say that it is. Why can't she just back off? She's the one not listening to God, I know I have been cuz things with Devin are so amazing.
I'm just so fed up. I'm not breaking up with him, dangit.
He's the second best thing that's happened to me.
The first, finding God.
Please someone help me.