(no subject)
Life is a boat.
There are dingy's and there are yachts.
I am definitely captain of a dingy. A dingy with a hole. And as I sit here waiting for sea monsters to choke on my bones, I ponder the actual reason that I'm at this point. I could fix that hole if I wanted to, but that takes time, effort, and care. I've never been one to follow through on fixing serious problems. It's so much easier to bitch, and expect it to solve itself.
Not today.
This was all sparked by my receptionist not showing up for work today. I had to do her job, and my job, and my office manager's job. Any raise comin' my way? No, no. Not for this go-getter. After being screamed at for a reason that was not my fault, and trying to resolve the issue with my boss who, in turn, yells at me for asking, I gave up. I'm sitting in front of a computer while phones ring off the hook, invoices pile up, deposits go undeposited, and bank reconciliations go unreconciliationified, and it brings me back to how I got here. I didn't try. I didn't try hard enough at school, so I didn't get great marks. I didn't spend enough time writing music, so it didn't go anywhere. So where does this land you? In business college. Most of you won't understand how embarrassing it is to answer the question, "...and what education do you have?"
"Uh, I went to the 'Gonk."
For those of you not in the know, the "gonk" is short for Algonquin College. It's basically Party-U without the university part. Now that we're caught up, I'll get to the end of this rant.
When you decide that you really aren't anything special and you enroll in business school, you can feel your dignity seeping out the holes in your shoes. Life draining slowly at first, gaining speed with every class you take. If any of you do enroll, bring lube and bus fare, 'cause you're gonna get fucked and left at the side o' the road. The business world is a joke that I don't get, but I've gotta keep up the laughter in order to not draw attention to myself. All similes aside, I want out.
As much as wanting is cool, it still ain't gonna happen. I've understood from the moment that I was born that life was not going to be easy, so I've prepared myself with bitterness and sarcasm. I have to be a provider at some point, and that's what really urks me. I don't even make enough money to scrape by, how am I going to afford what lies in the future? I guess I'll have to wait for one of my singles to reach the top ten.
No breath-holding here, chum...
"The world is a biiiig melting pot. All the shit rises to the top." Not this shit, baby...
For now I'll keep the smile on my face, even though I look damn hot when I frown.
Ha-chachacha...
Oh, I went GT snow-racing the other day. Man, it was even better than I remembered. Sweet...
"My mom bought me a t-shirt. When I wear it, I'm the shit.
I'm really not that legit, my mom bought it.
I played it off legit."
Gotsta love that fuzzy feeling,
Chris
There are dingy's and there are yachts.
I am definitely captain of a dingy. A dingy with a hole. And as I sit here waiting for sea monsters to choke on my bones, I ponder the actual reason that I'm at this point. I could fix that hole if I wanted to, but that takes time, effort, and care. I've never been one to follow through on fixing serious problems. It's so much easier to bitch, and expect it to solve itself.
Not today.
This was all sparked by my receptionist not showing up for work today. I had to do her job, and my job, and my office manager's job. Any raise comin' my way? No, no. Not for this go-getter. After being screamed at for a reason that was not my fault, and trying to resolve the issue with my boss who, in turn, yells at me for asking, I gave up. I'm sitting in front of a computer while phones ring off the hook, invoices pile up, deposits go undeposited, and bank reconciliations go unreconciliationified, and it brings me back to how I got here. I didn't try. I didn't try hard enough at school, so I didn't get great marks. I didn't spend enough time writing music, so it didn't go anywhere. So where does this land you? In business college. Most of you won't understand how embarrassing it is to answer the question, "...and what education do you have?"
"Uh, I went to the 'Gonk."
For those of you not in the know, the "gonk" is short for Algonquin College. It's basically Party-U without the university part. Now that we're caught up, I'll get to the end of this rant.
When you decide that you really aren't anything special and you enroll in business school, you can feel your dignity seeping out the holes in your shoes. Life draining slowly at first, gaining speed with every class you take. If any of you do enroll, bring lube and bus fare, 'cause you're gonna get fucked and left at the side o' the road. The business world is a joke that I don't get, but I've gotta keep up the laughter in order to not draw attention to myself. All similes aside, I want out.
As much as wanting is cool, it still ain't gonna happen. I've understood from the moment that I was born that life was not going to be easy, so I've prepared myself with bitterness and sarcasm. I have to be a provider at some point, and that's what really urks me. I don't even make enough money to scrape by, how am I going to afford what lies in the future? I guess I'll have to wait for one of my singles to reach the top ten.
No breath-holding here, chum...
"The world is a biiiig melting pot. All the shit rises to the top." Not this shit, baby...
For now I'll keep the smile on my face, even though I look damn hot when I frown.
Ha-chachacha...
Oh, I went GT snow-racing the other day. Man, it was even better than I remembered. Sweet...
"My mom bought me a t-shirt. When I wear it, I'm the shit.
I'm really not that legit, my mom bought it.
I played it off legit."
Gotsta love that fuzzy feeling,
Chris