Stop Crumbling the Cookie!
Title: Stop crumbling the cookie!
Characters: DBSK
Pairings: mostly yunjae, yusoo
Genre: humour, highschool, a bit cracky
Length: chaptered
Rating:pg
Summary: Jaejoong just got dumped by his super hot boyfriend and drags his friend to a frat party. But when he gets a little too drunk and ends up getting almost everyone he meets as drunk as he is, things start going bad. After, kind of sort of, accidentaly on purpose, sleeping with his arch-nemesis (or best friend... whatever), Jaejoong's life turns upside down and inside out. Now he must battle determined grandma's and mother's, and a really bitchy chick, (not actually beat them up, cuz... that's mean... especially the grandma) to be free to find his own happiness... whatever the hell that is.
Disclaimer: Ok so a bunch of other fics have this so i thought maybe i should put it up too.. teehee. So i don't own anything or anybody anywhere here.. except maybe the plot... so yeah... no ownage, although owning JJ would be sooo.. but i digress..
( Chapter 1 )
( Chapter 2 (part 1) )
Chapter 2 (suite)
"Oh, you dropped something." He said bending over, he picked up a ring from under my feet. As he straightened up, i felt his hands go up the seem of my pants... uh... his pants, and there was definite ass cuping. He held the ring out to me.
"That's not mine." I glared at him. "And you just grabbed my ass!"
"I did not!" He raised his hands defensively.
"You so did! I felt it!" I raised my voice at him.
"Maybe your going crazy. I did not even go near your ass." He smirked.
"Yes you did!" I shouted angrily. He was going to admit it, so help me God! He reached over, grabbed my right butt-cheek and squeazed. "Ah!" I squeaked. "What the hell?!"
"Now, I grabbed your ass." He smiled evilly. I was about to grab his ass back when the elevator doors swung open revealing a little old lady in a kimono. Her hair was pure white and braided, and it went all the way down to her feet. She was practically sweeping the floor with it. "Halmoni." Yunho bowed, and I imitated him. You had to respect Yunho's grandma, or she'll twist your ear in her amazingly strong fingers and make you regret it forever.
"Ah, Jaejoong-ah." She smiled at me, and I reminded myself to ask her where she got her teeth done, they looked really perfect. "We haven't seen you here in a long time." She said as she walked in. "So, you two have been shacking it up in the C wing, huh?" She smiled coyly and winked at me.
Yunho and I exchanged a glance, and just nodded awkwardly and looked away from his grandma. The elevator finally dinged, and the doors slid open. We walked towards the dining room. Yunho froze at the entrance, staring wide-eyed at the big-ass fit for a feast table. I followed his gaze and saw his first love sitting next to his brother, they were holding hands over the table. Poor boy. I leaned closer to him. "I thought you were gay now... think about that!" I whispered to him. He cocked an eyebrow at me, and I reached over and grabbed his butt. He squeaked like a little hamster. It was sooo funny! Ah... sweet payback.
I think Yunho had probably forgotten all about the girl, because he was grumbling something about revenge, as we walked to the table. Sitting down was very, VERY unpleasant. Yunho snickered when I winced, and I smacked him upside the head.
Yunho's mom came over and gave me a hug. She's a pretty lady, but she looks like she'd snap in half if you blew on her. "So you two," She said as she sat back down. "How was your honeymoon?" Except she was looking at us while she said it and not at the happy couple across the table.
I glanced up at Yunho and he was frozen again. "Do I have to grab your ass again?" I teased.
"I just realized, they had sex last night." He whispered to me.
"Yeah, and probably a lot of times before that." I smirked.
"Yeah, but last night was official! They had official sex!"
"You know I'm starting to think I was your first." I said to distract him.
"WHAT?!" He shrieked. Everyon shut up, and stared at him. He cleared his throat awkwardly, while I snickered.
"Loser." I laughed.
"Haha, very funny. Just eat your food." He grumbled. We satrted eating from the huge spread prepared by and ass-load of maids. I grabbed a cup of coffee and a bagel and just started shoveling down the food.
"Jaejoong Oppa!" Yunho's eight year old little sister squeaked. She flung herself at me for a big hug. "Where were you? I missed you soooo much!"
"How much?" I asked her and she giggled. Yun Ah is totally the most awesomely perfect little girl ever!
She stretched her arms wide apart. "Thiiiiiiiiiiiiis much!" She giggled.
"Well that's hardly enough." I pouted, putting my hands on my hips. She giggled and ran away before I could catch her and tickle her to death. I'd have usually ran after her, and chased her around the table, but I really didn't want to get up and have to sit back down again.
"I will get you!" I vowed, laughing.
"It's so sweet, that you and Yun Ah are so close." Boring goody two-shoes said. I really don't get what Yunho sees in her.
"Yes, our Yun Ah likes her Jaejoong oppa very much." Yunho's mom laughed, and her daughter harmonized with her little giggles.
Breakfast went pretty well, considering that Yunho's mom and grandma kept flinging innuendos at us, and Yunho's brother's wife's conversations were boring as hell! At one point she was like: "You know, yesterday, at the wedding, when we got married, me and Yunho's brother (I can't ever remember his name... it's Yun something...), yeah, well my maid of honor, my best friend, she cried." And that's it. There was no punch line, no joke, nothing. She didn't even change the tone of her voice. I was tempted to go "And?", but Yunho's grandma shook her head at me, like she had read my mind and knew how pointless my attempt would have been.
After breakfast, me and Yunho went down to the indoor parking lot, to get his car and go to school... yaaaaay... (sarcasm)
_____________________________
03
** WOOO! Okay, i'm somewhat pissed right now, because I did something stupid and all i wrote got erased and I had to write it all over again.. well I feel better now that it's done! Okay, so alot of ppl have been asking for smut.. and I would love to do it... but I dont think I would be good.. id feel like I was copying other fics smut scenes.. or ill start feeling awkward and try to make it funny and they'd end up banging their heads on the headboard and ruining the moment.. so I will try VERY hard to make a good smut scene.. but im not promising anything, except well.. the trying... so dont get your hopes up! Thnx for reading :D**
Characters: DBSK
Pairings: mostly yunjae, yusoo
Genre: humour, highschool, a bit cracky
Length: chaptered
Rating:pg
Summary: Jaejoong just got dumped by his super hot boyfriend and drags his friend to a frat party. But when he gets a little too drunk and ends up getting almost everyone he meets as drunk as he is, things start going bad. After, kind of sort of, accidentaly on purpose, sleeping with his arch-nemesis (or best friend... whatever), Jaejoong's life turns upside down and inside out. Now he must battle determined grandma's and mother's, and a really bitchy chick, (not actually beat them up, cuz... that's mean... especially the grandma) to be free to find his own happiness... whatever the hell that is.
Disclaimer: Ok so a bunch of other fics have this so i thought maybe i should put it up too.. teehee. So i don't own anything or anybody anywhere here.. except maybe the plot... so yeah... no ownage, although owning JJ would be sooo.. but i digress..
( Chapter 1 )
( Chapter 2 (part 1) )
Chapter 2 (suite)
"Oh, you dropped something." He said bending over, he picked up a ring from under my feet. As he straightened up, i felt his hands go up the seem of my pants... uh... his pants, and there was definite ass cuping. He held the ring out to me.
"That's not mine." I glared at him. "And you just grabbed my ass!"
"I did not!" He raised his hands defensively.
"You so did! I felt it!" I raised my voice at him.
"Maybe your going crazy. I did not even go near your ass." He smirked.
"Yes you did!" I shouted angrily. He was going to admit it, so help me God! He reached over, grabbed my right butt-cheek and squeazed. "Ah!" I squeaked. "What the hell?!"
"Now, I grabbed your ass." He smiled evilly. I was about to grab his ass back when the elevator doors swung open revealing a little old lady in a kimono. Her hair was pure white and braided, and it went all the way down to her feet. She was practically sweeping the floor with it. "Halmoni." Yunho bowed, and I imitated him. You had to respect Yunho's grandma, or she'll twist your ear in her amazingly strong fingers and make you regret it forever.
"Ah, Jaejoong-ah." She smiled at me, and I reminded myself to ask her where she got her teeth done, they looked really perfect. "We haven't seen you here in a long time." She said as she walked in. "So, you two have been shacking it up in the C wing, huh?" She smiled coyly and winked at me.
Yunho and I exchanged a glance, and just nodded awkwardly and looked away from his grandma. The elevator finally dinged, and the doors slid open. We walked towards the dining room. Yunho froze at the entrance, staring wide-eyed at the big-ass fit for a feast table. I followed his gaze and saw his first love sitting next to his brother, they were holding hands over the table. Poor boy. I leaned closer to him. "I thought you were gay now... think about that!" I whispered to him. He cocked an eyebrow at me, and I reached over and grabbed his butt. He squeaked like a little hamster. It was sooo funny! Ah... sweet payback.
I think Yunho had probably forgotten all about the girl, because he was grumbling something about revenge, as we walked to the table. Sitting down was very, VERY unpleasant. Yunho snickered when I winced, and I smacked him upside the head.
Yunho's mom came over and gave me a hug. She's a pretty lady, but she looks like she'd snap in half if you blew on her. "So you two," She said as she sat back down. "How was your honeymoon?" Except she was looking at us while she said it and not at the happy couple across the table.
I glanced up at Yunho and he was frozen again. "Do I have to grab your ass again?" I teased.
"I just realized, they had sex last night." He whispered to me.
"Yeah, and probably a lot of times before that." I smirked.
"Yeah, but last night was official! They had official sex!"
"You know I'm starting to think I was your first." I said to distract him.
"WHAT?!" He shrieked. Everyon shut up, and stared at him. He cleared his throat awkwardly, while I snickered.
"Loser." I laughed.
"Haha, very funny. Just eat your food." He grumbled. We satrted eating from the huge spread prepared by and ass-load of maids. I grabbed a cup of coffee and a bagel and just started shoveling down the food.
"Jaejoong Oppa!" Yunho's eight year old little sister squeaked. She flung herself at me for a big hug. "Where were you? I missed you soooo much!"
"How much?" I asked her and she giggled. Yun Ah is totally the most awesomely perfect little girl ever!
She stretched her arms wide apart. "Thiiiiiiiiiiiiis much!" She giggled.
"Well that's hardly enough." I pouted, putting my hands on my hips. She giggled and ran away before I could catch her and tickle her to death. I'd have usually ran after her, and chased her around the table, but I really didn't want to get up and have to sit back down again.
"I will get you!" I vowed, laughing.
"It's so sweet, that you and Yun Ah are so close." Boring goody two-shoes said. I really don't get what Yunho sees in her.
"Yes, our Yun Ah likes her Jaejoong oppa very much." Yunho's mom laughed, and her daughter harmonized with her little giggles.
Breakfast went pretty well, considering that Yunho's mom and grandma kept flinging innuendos at us, and Yunho's brother's wife's conversations were boring as hell! At one point she was like: "You know, yesterday, at the wedding, when we got married, me and Yunho's brother (I can't ever remember his name... it's Yun something...), yeah, well my maid of honor, my best friend, she cried." And that's it. There was no punch line, no joke, nothing. She didn't even change the tone of her voice. I was tempted to go "And?", but Yunho's grandma shook her head at me, like she had read my mind and knew how pointless my attempt would have been.
After breakfast, me and Yunho went down to the indoor parking lot, to get his car and go to school... yaaaaay... (sarcasm)
_____________________________
03
** WOOO! Okay, i'm somewhat pissed right now, because I did something stupid and all i wrote got erased and I had to write it all over again.. well I feel better now that it's done! Okay, so alot of ppl have been asking for smut.. and I would love to do it... but I dont think I would be good.. id feel like I was copying other fics smut scenes.. or ill start feeling awkward and try to make it funny and they'd end up banging their heads on the headboard and ruining the moment.. so I will try VERY hard to make a good smut scene.. but im not promising anything, except well.. the trying... so dont get your hopes up! Thnx for reading :D**