Beauty and the Beast | Chapter 20/20 [Part 2] -LAST CHAPTER-: love

love_cassiopeia

Beauty and the Beast | Chapter 20/20 [Part 2] -LAST CHAPTER-

Jun 13, 2009 17:17

[ P a r t T w o ]

Beauty and the Beast
Author: love_cassiopeia
Summary: Jung Yunho - a gifted and successful actor. Kim Jaejoong - Yunho's biggest fan. After receiving the task to interview Yunho for his journalism assignment, Jaejoong realizes that his favourite actor just might transform him from a "fan" into something much more.
Rated: PG-13 ~ NC-17
Disclaimer: I don’t own the five members, I’m simply borrowing them.
Warning(s): NC-17 material, language
Genre: Romance/Comedy
Pairing(s): YunJae
Chapter 20: roue de ferris

[<- Part 1 ]

20.

Part 2:

roue de ferris

I walked by myself in the streets for a few minutes, astonished that passengers were still roaming the busy boulevards. I look the time to admire the tall and masculine French men, reminding myself that their manly looks and suave actions matched to that of Yunho’s. Just like the actor, these men were exceptionally tall and attractive, showcasing beautiful women by their sides that would assist them in their urbane image.

Of course, it was the image that mattered the most. Like any other fan, I was attracted to Yunho by his looks at first, awed by his model-like body and his god-sculpted features. I was enthralled by how the sunshine hit his face in the perfect angle on camera; how wonderful he looked in the unusual costumes he was asked to wear. I was astounded by his strong, commanding eyes in his ad campaigns, and most of all that beauty mark which lingered above his upper lip which emphasized his sexuality.

Oh yes, it was all looks from the beginning. As long as he maintained his flawless countenance, I would continue to be in love with him.

But, as time sailed by, I was drawn to him by the talent and the magic he held within his palms. I would often find myself comparing Yunho to other actors of his time, continuously believing that he would always end up on top of the game. I began to treat Yunho as a godly figure, knowing that every facet he possessed was perfect and refined.

And then, it was the power he had that made me fall even deeper.

Jung Yunho was influential. He had raked in millions of awards over the years and was classified as a ‘professional.’ He had film companies hunting after him, large amounts of money pouring into his bank account, and hell, thousands of everyday females screaming his name like a mantra and desiring him for their own. Perhaps that was another reason why I had become so infatuated with him-because he held absolute power within the foundation of society.

It was automatic that I had begun to unconditionally love him. He had all I wanted, and all that I lacked. My love for him was not a simple secondary-school crush; it was more of an obsession. I had watched him take every single step, film every movie, and sign every endorsement. I had furtively cursed the actresses whom he had filmed with, too envious that they had the opportunity to do what I could not.

Yes, that was me then. I considered it rather embarrassing that I had gone through such a stage of obsession and absurdity. Back then, watching the actor from afar, I claimed him forcefully as mine and mine only. Only recently did I realize that my desires would be far from fulfilled.

I was selfish back then. I declared him for my own without considering if the actor would approve of it or not.

So when he abandoned me a few weeks ago, I was struck by a bold wake-up call that impelled me to escape my fantasies. It was because of my experience with him that brought me to discover that a fan meant absolutely nothing to his idol, not when the two originated from completely different worlds. Our thoughts could never be brought together in agreement, nor would our lifestyles merge into one. After all this time, I had discovered that two puzzle pieces simply did not fit into each other. What could I do about it in the end?

We as soul mates were not born into the correct bodies. Although it felt as if we completed each other on the island, we couldn’t change the course of fate, no matter how hard we tried.

It was all futile in the beginning, trying to fit together two puzzle pieces from two completely different puzzles simply because one was attracted to the other.

Escaping from my ridiculously lengthy path of thoughts, I began to recognize the familiar surroundings which encircled me. A part of me reminded myself that I had been to this division of town before. Although the scenery was no doubt familiar, I couldn’t quite put my finger on why or when I had visited such a part of Paris. My footsteps became completely mechanical as I strolled through the streets. I had no idea where I was going, so I allowed my body to take me wherever it desired.

I knew I had been here before. It wasn’t only pure instinct, it was memory.

My footsteps eventually came to a pause, slowing down my racing heart and allowing my eyes to examine my surroundings. As I looked up, I discerned that I was standing amongst a vivacious carnival, one which I could never dare to forget.

I was in anger yet struck with complete awe. My footsteps had actually remembered this place, leading me back here without asking for my permission. I was a bit disenchanted that my weak mind had still chosen not to relinquish such memories. Although it had been quite a long time, I had chosen to remember every aspect of the day Yunho and I escaped to this carnival.

I let my eyes eat up the lovely image placed before me. Every ride in the carnival was relatively the same as it was before. The lights held their same, never-fading lustre while the roller-coasters still presented me with a pang of fear. Although it was three o’ clock in the morning, French locals were still out and about, enjoying the best of the vibrant amusement park.

My heartbeat synchronized with my footsteps as I was led to the familiar Ferris wheel. The first time I had been upon such a lofty ride, I was with Yunho. He was there to protect me from my trepidation-to laugh at me for my inevitable fear of heights.

Today, however, there would be no form of protection as I stepped on. There would be no one lese but me within the small compartment.

Like an idiot, I observed the Ferris wheel for a good five minutes, watching the passengers’ contended faces as they boarded the ride. I watched the millions of snowflakes lightly kiss the colossal wheel, discovering the pure beauty of the structure and the beautiful view I would have within one of those cubicles.

It was not only the Ferris wheel or the carnival I found familiar. I felt a blatant rush of déjà vu succumb my body as I distinguished something (or in this case, someone)-something so extraordinary that my eyes had nearly been blinded.

Among the large crowds of locals, he stood, waiting in the short line in order to experience the elation of the Ferris wheel.

I felt completely mortified, seeing him here. I had no idea what he was doing in Paris, and it would be more than awkward to have him recognize me, standing here by myself like a complete idiot.

Why the hell was he here in Paris?

In spite of the distance between us, it was impossible not to have him recognize me. Through the gentle snowfall, his eye contact linked with mine, sending a strange electric shock through my body once again.

I took me a moment to gawk at the grandeur of his features, marvelled at how striking the man still was. After his moment of bafflement, his eyes became gentle, revealing a flicker of misery as his vision captured me.

I still couldn’t understand. Was this perhaps a mirage, created by my own hasty mind to deceive the living daylights out of me? Or was it really Jung Yunho standing across the Ferris wheel, meeting his deep chocolate-brown eyes with mine?

If it really was him, what the fuck was he doing here, in the middle of a carnival, trying to replay the moments he and I spent together?

Why not go over to him and ask?

And so I did. It wasn’t easy, trying to impel myself to approach a man who I thought wasn’t really there. When he advanced towards me in the same manner however, I felt that there was nothing dream-like about this arbitrary reunion.

We walked until we were about a meter away from each other, keeping the distance just in case my vision was deceiving me. The attraction I held towards him however, brought me inches closer to him, allowing me to realize that what I was seeing wasn’t a delusion after all.

The two of us stared blankly at each other for a few seconds, reluctant to speak or to make any actions. We were still embarrassed, especially because our last conflict didn’t end very smoothly.

I was dying to yell out to him, and yet I couldn’t. I had so much to say, but my voice was averse to make a single sound. Seeing him once again made my bones quiver and my body paralyzed; I didn’t know if it was the good looks or the memorable moments we spent together which drove me insane.

“Are you going to get on or what?” After minutes of staring blankly into each other’s eyes, the actor finally spoke, lifting the fine hairs of my nape with his deep voice. Instead of saying ‘hello’ or ‘how are you,’ the actor made his greeting simple and candid, displaying his mischievous side to me once again.

I nodded, deciding not to say anything. I would save my questions for later, when we were safe and sound inside the small booth.

A part of me wanted to describe our sudden meeting as ‘awkward.’ Another part of me contradicted the fact that it was a blessing seeing him act so gentle towards me-he hated me, the last time I saw him. Most of me strongly opposed this meeting. Out of all the people I could’ve come across this very night, he was the most undesirable.

But I had no choice. The incoherent, foolish fan-boy inside me chose to follow him into one of the Ferris wheel’s compartments, overjoyed that he was able to see his long-admired idol once again.

As we arrived in the tiny compartment, I sat a few feet away from him, unwilling to close the space that stretched between us. I let my eyes focus on the downward scenery, completely humiliated to turn the other direction to meet my eyes with his.

But there were so many questions to ask…so much to tell. What was I to do?

Almost automatically, my voice let loose and let out a few notes. I had no idea whether that was the smart thing to do or not.

“I hate you.”

Although my muttering was quite silent, there was no doubt that the actor had perceived it. He turned towards me with his eyebrow raised, astonished that I had used such a choice of words to greet him.

He held a wry face. “So this is how you choose to greet me, huh?” He asked, a sour tone in his voice. “Usually, fans would say ‘I love you’ or ‘it’s so great to see you’ when they first meet me.”

I grimaced at him with fury in my eyes. “W-wait… what the hell are you even doing here?”

He gave me an incredulous glare. “Remember Jaejoong, I still have a damn movie to finish up here.” He clarified. “Just moments ago, I was forced to kiss some random actress at the Eiffel tower. Luckily, I was able to escape from all that.”

“What?” So you’re out here shooting at three in the morning?”

“So?” He asked, shrugging his shoulders “I mean, what are you doing out here at three in the morning? Shouldn’t you be in Japan?”

I was a bit dumbfounded by his casual words. After all the trouble I had brought along, he had still not hesitated to speak with me in the same tone he had a month ago. Due to our argument, I expected him to leave immediately as he recognized my face at the carnival. But strangely, I was far from correct.

I shook my head in dismay. “Japan was quite boring, actually.” I admitted. “I was impressed with Paris the last time I was here. I figured that it would be amusing to splurge a bit and revisit the spirit of this city.” A smile lit up on my lips as I spoke-what a surprise! “I didn’t make much progress in Japan... or to be honest, any. But you’re pretty busy, aren’t you? Getting to kiss stunning actresses and climbing your way to the top of the entertainment world.”

He smirked, amused at my comment. “Jealous of that actress, aren’t you?”

I tried to keep a straight face as I half-heartedly replied him. “No, in fact, I’m not the least bit jealous.” I lied, knowing that envy would forever dominate me. “The old Jaejoong would’ve been, though.”

He made a sympathetic face. “Aww… poor him…” He teased, making my blood boil. “Lucky for him, I wasn’t able to kiss that actress.”

That certainly captured my full awareness. I manoeuvred myself inches closer to him, ravenous for answers.

“Why?” I questioned. “Why not kiss the gorgeous woman?”

He sighed, pausing for a few moments. I could see doubt in his eyes, mixed into an elixir with fear and apprehension.

“You kept popping up in my mind.” He declared powerfully, not a single tone of remorse in his voice. “No matter how hard I tried to stimulate myself to kiss her, I just wasn’t able to with your image in my consciousness.”

I was speechless, paralyzed from head to toe by his intriguing words. The mellifluous thoughts in my mind ran in a rivulet of confusion, allowing my voice to halt within my throat. After all the mayhem, he still had the energy to place me in his memories?

It was quite astonishing, having the man who you thought despised you turn out to be the one that held you preciously within his heart.

I was unable to answer him. For three o’ clock I the morning, this was just too much for me to handle.

“I have to say that I don’t despise you one bit, Jaejoong.” He remarked. “After reading that newspaper article, the only person who I would ever dare to despise is myself.”

I furrowed my eyebrows, drowning within the presence of my confusion. “The newspaper? You actually read the newspaper?”

He nodded. “Of course.” He responded. “It was issued the day after you left for Japan. And I must say, I was quite amazed with your article.”

“Were you amazed with my writing ability or amazed with the ‘Jung Yunho’ portrayed in the article?” I bantered, knowing that my question would certainly poke at his nerves. “Answer me.” I commanded after a period of silence stretched between us.

“I was amazed by neither.” He stated confidently, making sure I would be able to hear the pure honesty in his voice. “I was only amazed by your judgments-at how you viewed me through your article.”

I shook my head. “B-but… you hate me!”

“Not after I realized the truth.” He announced. “There was definitely a period of revulsion during the days when I thought the worst of you. The newspaper was dry proof that you had not been working for VX magazine, but only for a college course.”

I rolled my eyes. “Only now do you figure this out.”

His muscular arms brought me closer to him, almost in a gentle embrace (although, it didn’t quite go all the way). “I’m sorry Jaejoong…” He whispered, deep regret arising in his chest. “I had hurt you unconditionally without even noticing I had.” He shook his head, cursing at himself for the tedious mistake. “All the misery you’ve experienced these past few weeks… it was all because of me.”

I brought my fingers to his lips, enclosing them so that sound would have no way of escaping. “Y-Yunho… just-shut up.” I ordered. “It was my mistake from the very beginning for acting so irresponsibly. If I had never appeared in your life, none of this would’ve bothered to occur.”

He held melancholy in his eyes. “But I’m glad.” He noted. “I’m glad that I was able to meet you in the long run. In the end, I’m the ridiculous one for throwing away what I needed most.” With his one arm still around me, he dug into his front jean pocket and pulled out a wrinkled newspaper cut-out. “I carry this with me everywhere I go.” He commented, indicating to the small newspaper clipping. “I feel as if you’re with me when I carry this, and ironically, this article alone brought me all the way here, back to you.”

I scrutinized the small piece of paper, remembering every word I wrote and the arduous effort I had put into constructing the article. “I didn’t know that my article would make such a big impact…” I spoke between breaths. “I-I… I don’t know what to say…”

He offered me a tender grin. “I snuck out of the house to buy fifty copies of this newspaper, believe it or not.”

I lifted an eyebrow, completely flabbergasted by his absurdity. “Fuck, Yunho!” I cried. “Why the hell did you do that?”

“It was necessary.” He shrugged, taking a quick glance at the downward view.

“You know what I did with the money I earned from this article?” I questioned, receiving a curious grin from him in return. “I spent it on buying your movies. Thirty-three of them, to be exact.”

He was marvelled, all right. “You’re insane, Jaejoong.” He criticized. “And yet… you’ve never changed your fan-boy ways, even after all this time.”

“You make it sound as if it’s a crime, being a fan-boy.”

“It’s not.” He replied nonchalantly. “In fact, I think it’s fairly amusing finding someone whom you admire so much that you’re willing to give up a portion of your life for them. Being an admirer is a wonderful thing. Besides, where would I be if I didn’t have fans?”

I rolled my eyes, refusing to hear any more of his logical explanations. I pulled myself closer to his chest, realizing that it was not the actor who I had fallen in love with, but the incredible person which stood under all of that glamour and stamina.

Together, we watched the pristine crystals of snowflakes fall upon the ethereal metropolis. There was silence within the small compartment; but it was an enrapturing silence. There were no interruptions from the outside world to sidetrack us from the nirvana we had created here. And it was only now that I realized the two of us were capable of creating a finished puzzle.

Letting go of all the pain I had experienced within my entire lifetime, I grasped onto his collar, bringing my desperate lips inches closer to his. He responded my fervent actions with his own, meeting his lips with mine in a suave yet sloppy manner.

I gave up my whole soul as I wrapped my arms desperately around his broad shoulders, claming the man as mine once again. I let my lips travel within his, familiarizing myself once more with the inviting sensation. As eager as we both were, we both slowed down a bit, worried that our rash actions would hurt one another.

Yes, after all this time, this was still what I desired the most. We broke apart-not because we didn’t want anymore, but just because our lungs were yearning for oxygen. I stared into his chocolate-coloured eyes with relief, mirthful that I was able to mingle my lips once more with his.

“Are you still afraid of heights?” He asked right out of the blue, panting from our sensual kiss moments ago.

I exhaled, incredulous that he had brought about the outlandish question during such an inept time.

“I went bungee jumping with you, remember?” I asked. “The Ferris wheel is nothing compared to that.”

“Good.” He answered, a roguish smirk on his lips. “Because I want to stay on this ride for as long as possible.”

I chuckled at his absurdity and embraced him once more, allowing my hungry lips to devour the sweet cherry placed upon the appetizing ice cream sundae.

Our fingers entwined together as our souls rooted deeply within each other’s. After the puzzle was complete, there would be no way to abolish the final picture, not ever.

And even if we did depart, we would peculiarly find ourselves in each other’s arms once more-no matter how far we were or how many rules we broke.

It was something that not eve snow-covered Ferris wheels, enlightening newspaper articles, or the vibrant scenery of Paris could explain. As abstract as it was, the two of us had it all figured out as our lips met that night.

There were, however, some things in our world which logic could perfectly explain. With Yunho in my life, I had felt myself grow tremendously-once from an insignificant admirer, to a now confident and strong companion. He had changed my life drastically, not only with his love, but with the deep pain he had inflicted upon me as well.

So was there going to be a ‘happily ever after’ in the end? I didn’t really appreciate the clichéd phrase, but why not?

“You’re such a beauty, Jaejoong.”

“Well, excuse the joke, but you’re pretty beastly yourself.”

Epilogue

Now that I’m finished, I hope that the ending was not too abrupt for your tastes. D=

I’m really grateful that I have such amazing readers who are able to post long comments with helpful feedback. I couldn’t have finished this story without you guys. I might look like I’m the only writer of the story, but you guys have contributed loads to this as well.

Thank you to all who have left me comments/anticipated for the upcoming chapters. I owe it to you <3

Feel free to hop over to the OST:

beauty and the beast