ITG
I near yet again to another birthday and look back realizing that life hasn't been as bad as I'd like to make it look in this LJ. Bumps and bruises along the way. Lost friends. Gained friends. Fell in love. Fell out of love. Felt hatred. Felt hated. Became threatened. Became a threat. Tried to run. Wanted to stand still for just one moment. Wondered if anyone would miss me. Realized that they would. Hated myself for losing the best people in the world. Liked myself for landing a killer job...
And still I wonder if I'm happy. I supposed I am but isn't it just life to want to be somewhere else?
I hope to finally start Post Secondary. I'm finally moving forward again. I'm back to where I was at the end of Grade 11 and it feels great. No love, no relationships beyond friendship. I'm able to focus on dreams and being happy again. Love and Pride really do hurt people, especially when mixed. I haven't forgotten the pain I caused myself and probably other people. I still feel it at night when I sleep and sometimes during the day while I work. The scars are there and I hope they never go away. Scars make people beautiful.
I'm trying to select a road into Comp Sci. Programming seems quite intriguing. If that doesn't work there's always the fact that I will have the credits and could still take up being a Doctor. For now I'll work on Programming and getting further in the job I already have.
I miss you five, whether you know it or not. I hope you all are doing well. *smiles*
PS Only three spelling mistakes. I'm getting better. Alas the grammar won't change.
And still I wonder if I'm happy. I supposed I am but isn't it just life to want to be somewhere else?
I hope to finally start Post Secondary. I'm finally moving forward again. I'm back to where I was at the end of Grade 11 and it feels great. No love, no relationships beyond friendship. I'm able to focus on dreams and being happy again. Love and Pride really do hurt people, especially when mixed. I haven't forgotten the pain I caused myself and probably other people. I still feel it at night when I sleep and sometimes during the day while I work. The scars are there and I hope they never go away. Scars make people beautiful.
I'm trying to select a road into Comp Sci. Programming seems quite intriguing. If that doesn't work there's always the fact that I will have the credits and could still take up being a Doctor. For now I'll work on Programming and getting further in the job I already have.
I miss you five, whether you know it or not. I hope you all are doing well. *smiles*
PS Only three spelling mistakes. I'm getting better. Alas the grammar won't change.