So, it's all sorted out.
Well, since arriving back from Waterloo, a lot has happened. Sort of.
Everything with Luther is straightened out. So I'm really happy. But anyway, I'll start from the beginning of when I got home... actually no, I'll start with when I left waterloo, before I got home.
I figured since the bus station is on the way, I'd go and see my best friend Lindsay before I went back to London.... and it was a good idea, and I'm glad I saw her, but on the way I nearly froze to death. It was like minus 17 degrees outside (don't you just love winter?). So I had to cuddle with Luther in the bus shelter to keep warm. But it was really cold. I couldn't stop shaking until I got on the bus. So yeah, we took 2 busses, and finally got to Lindsay's house. It was really nice to see her, and a couple hours later I got to see her mom as well, and that was also nice. I used to live with her and her mom and her 2 sisters after things got bad with my own mom, so yeah, her family is like family to me. So her mom is like a mom to me.. and I haven't seen them in ages. So really it was a nice visit. So yeah, then Lindsay walked me and Luther to the mall, and we hung out there for a bit. Me and Luther had a putine (which is french fries and gravy and cheese, in case you don't know), and we all talked for about 30 minutes at most. And then they both walked me to my bus and I kissed and hugged Luther goodbye and I hugged lindsay too. And then I was off to the bus station in the cold on a bus.. at night... yeah.. fun. At least I had music to keep me company. But I almost cried all the way home. I held it in though.
And then I was back in london. As soon as I got there I felt depressed. London just depresses me so much. It's so dirty and the people are weird. And then I got to my house, and it was completely messy. The dishes weren't done, and there was junk everywhere. And that depressed me even more. And I missed Luther so much already that even though I had to go to work at 8 in the morning, I stayed up until 1 am just to talk to him. But even then I only got to talk to him for about 20-30 minutes. So yeah, for the next three days I had to work, and hardly got to talk to him. And when I commented him on myspace he didn't comment back, and when I talked to him on msn (which wasn't much), it was probably all in my head, but it seemed like he didn't even care that I was gone. Well except for the fact that I remember him telling me how he's able to sleep beside me, when usually when he is sleeping beside someone he always wakes up or can't fall asleep or gets up to go to the bathroom a bunch of times. But he said he sleeps really well beside me. but yeah on msn he said he wasn't sleeping too well, so that was the only think that showed he cared about the fact that I was gone. But because of me not thinking he cared anymore, I got even more depressed...
But today, finally, we got to talk. And it was a good talk. I found out that he does still care, and I told him that I do still care, and we had this big discussion about me moving in with him and we just sorted everything all out.
So it turns out I will be moving in with him (it's like 90% for sure) in about a month and 3 weeks... maybe 2 months. And I'll start school there at an adult school, so I can finally finish my diploma, and I'll get a job there as well. But since I have about 2 months, I'm going to ask my boss if I can start working full time until I move, so that I can save up lots of money to help with the move and food for a month or so, and any other expenses I might have when I move. So if my boss says yes about me working full time, then it'll be really good. If not, I'll just save up whatever money I can. And I've emailed Christine, my big sister, to ask her if she'll be able to help me move my stuff there, and I'm just waiting for a response. I really hope she can, otherwise I don't know how I'll get my stuff there. I'll find a way though.
So that means, school is figured out, and work is figured out, and money is figured out. And as soon as I see him again, I'm going to ask him to be my boyfriend. I didn't ask him already because I was too afraid he'd say no, and now that I'm in a different city I can't ask him, because I have to ask him in person... it's not good to ask someone out online.
All I know is that I'm so happy I'm moving out. And I'm so happy he still cares. And I'm happy that eventually, I'll be able to call him my boyfriend.
Everything just seems to be falling into place.
And my dad also said that if I stayed until april he'd give me some money to help me get started with luther. So yes, everything is falling into place. I'm so excited. Finally, I'll be able to live my life!
Everything with Luther is straightened out. So I'm really happy. But anyway, I'll start from the beginning of when I got home... actually no, I'll start with when I left waterloo, before I got home.
I figured since the bus station is on the way, I'd go and see my best friend Lindsay before I went back to London.... and it was a good idea, and I'm glad I saw her, but on the way I nearly froze to death. It was like minus 17 degrees outside (don't you just love winter?). So I had to cuddle with Luther in the bus shelter to keep warm. But it was really cold. I couldn't stop shaking until I got on the bus. So yeah, we took 2 busses, and finally got to Lindsay's house. It was really nice to see her, and a couple hours later I got to see her mom as well, and that was also nice. I used to live with her and her mom and her 2 sisters after things got bad with my own mom, so yeah, her family is like family to me. So her mom is like a mom to me.. and I haven't seen them in ages. So really it was a nice visit. So yeah, then Lindsay walked me and Luther to the mall, and we hung out there for a bit. Me and Luther had a putine (which is french fries and gravy and cheese, in case you don't know), and we all talked for about 30 minutes at most. And then they both walked me to my bus and I kissed and hugged Luther goodbye and I hugged lindsay too. And then I was off to the bus station in the cold on a bus.. at night... yeah.. fun. At least I had music to keep me company. But I almost cried all the way home. I held it in though.
And then I was back in london. As soon as I got there I felt depressed. London just depresses me so much. It's so dirty and the people are weird. And then I got to my house, and it was completely messy. The dishes weren't done, and there was junk everywhere. And that depressed me even more. And I missed Luther so much already that even though I had to go to work at 8 in the morning, I stayed up until 1 am just to talk to him. But even then I only got to talk to him for about 20-30 minutes. So yeah, for the next three days I had to work, and hardly got to talk to him. And when I commented him on myspace he didn't comment back, and when I talked to him on msn (which wasn't much), it was probably all in my head, but it seemed like he didn't even care that I was gone. Well except for the fact that I remember him telling me how he's able to sleep beside me, when usually when he is sleeping beside someone he always wakes up or can't fall asleep or gets up to go to the bathroom a bunch of times. But he said he sleeps really well beside me. but yeah on msn he said he wasn't sleeping too well, so that was the only think that showed he cared about the fact that I was gone. But because of me not thinking he cared anymore, I got even more depressed...
But today, finally, we got to talk. And it was a good talk. I found out that he does still care, and I told him that I do still care, and we had this big discussion about me moving in with him and we just sorted everything all out.
So it turns out I will be moving in with him (it's like 90% for sure) in about a month and 3 weeks... maybe 2 months. And I'll start school there at an adult school, so I can finally finish my diploma, and I'll get a job there as well. But since I have about 2 months, I'm going to ask my boss if I can start working full time until I move, so that I can save up lots of money to help with the move and food for a month or so, and any other expenses I might have when I move. So if my boss says yes about me working full time, then it'll be really good. If not, I'll just save up whatever money I can. And I've emailed Christine, my big sister, to ask her if she'll be able to help me move my stuff there, and I'm just waiting for a response. I really hope she can, otherwise I don't know how I'll get my stuff there. I'll find a way though.
So that means, school is figured out, and work is figured out, and money is figured out. And as soon as I see him again, I'm going to ask him to be my boyfriend. I didn't ask him already because I was too afraid he'd say no, and now that I'm in a different city I can't ask him, because I have to ask him in person... it's not good to ask someone out online.
All I know is that I'm so happy I'm moving out. And I'm so happy he still cares. And I'm happy that eventually, I'll be able to call him my boyfriend.
Everything just seems to be falling into place.
And my dad also said that if I stayed until april he'd give me some money to help me get started with luther. So yes, everything is falling into place. I'm so excited. Finally, I'll be able to live my life!