Hello everyone.
Wow, it's been a while since I've last updated. I've been in Kitchener for the past week and few days. I've been visiting my guy friend Luther. I absolutely love it here... He makes the greatest food ever. I've probably gained some weight since I've come here, which is good because I'm way way too skinny. I'm not going to go into detail about the food though, simply because I'm too lazy. But I'll just say, it's really really good food.
While I was here I got to see 2 of my friends that I haven't seen in a while... Chris and Lisa. So that was pretty nice... although Chris is really weird now. And I also got to meet 2 people.. Kayla and Kara. They're both really awesome and nice. But also, 2 of my friends have cancelled plans with me. My best friend Lindsay made up some excuses not to come over, which was dumb. And Pat just couldn't hang out because of random reasons. So it's too bad I didn't see them yet. I'll probably be seeing lindsay some time this week. But I probably won't be seeing Pat for a really long time, because he'll be busy all this week and then he's moving out of his parents house. I'm so happy he is too. Everyone keeps telling him it's a bad idea, but he's *really* unhappy there. So I think he should just ignore everyone and do it. It will be a good experience for him.
So yeah, I really like being here with Luther. He's a great guy. He's just getting over his ex gf though, so I haven't asked him to be my boyfriend yet. I could any time, and he'd most likely say yes.. but he needs more time, so I'm going to wait. I don't even know if I should ask him out. I mean I'm going back to london in about a week.... so who knows what will happen. I mean, he asked me to move in with him, and I'm more than willing to do that... but it's more complicated than me just packing my stuff and moving. Because I'm worried about my schooling. I still need gr 10, 11, and 12. And I don't want to go back to a regular highschool. I could just go to his school... but won't it be hard? Because I'll need to have a job too, to pay for my food. Or I could just forget about school and just work. Or try doing homeschooling while I'm here. He's a teacher after all, so he could help me. But I'd really have to try hard to finish it all and to get up and follow through with the work on a regular basis. Which I could do.. it would just take a lot of effort. I'm also afraid that if I move here I won't be able to find a job. I suck at finding jobs. And if I can't find one, then I dunno... I mean he probably would pay for my food at first, but after a while I don't know if he still could.
So yes, I guess I just have to sort those three things out... food, school, and work.... and then everything will be fine.
But then there's the fact that I'm a complete commitment phobe. It seems like such a big thing to become his girlfriend and move in.. (oh and in case you don't know me in person which most of you don't, I live in london, and he lives in waterloo.. and those 2 cities are like an hour and a half away from each other... so if I want to be his gf (which I do) I can't just not move in). But I guess I could get over that. okay so there's 4 things I have to work through.... food, school, work, and my commitment phobia. I'm really not good at doing things long term, and this is something I would want to be long term... I don't want to mess everything up like I usually do.
Oh yeah, and then there's the fact that I would have to go home, quit my job, tell my dad I'm moving, pack my stuff and find a way to get it to Luther's. I'm sure my big sister could help me move my stuff though... since she has a car, and I don't have much stuff.
Oh yeah, and then there's the thing that because of the fact that him and his gf just broke up and he's not completely over her yet, I might just be a rebound.. so if that's the case, then moving in with him is not a good idea.
Arrg... so much stuff to sort out. food, school, work, commitment phobia, quitting job, packing stuff, finding away to move stuff, worrying about being a rebound.... It's becoming rather overwhelming.... but I like him so much. I think I love him... I mean, I can't even stand to be away from him for more than 5 minutes... and sometimes when he's like not even a meter away from me it feels like he's too far away.. which is really weird. Gah.. I guess I'll just have to work through all that stuff. Every realationship needs sacrifices right? Every relationship has things that need to be worked through right?
I guess the only thing I can do is give it a try.
Oh yeah... and I haven't gotten a chance to read anyone's Live journals lately... since I've been busy with Luther.. so I'll have to read them some other time.
PeAcE oUt DaWg! lol.
While I was here I got to see 2 of my friends that I haven't seen in a while... Chris and Lisa. So that was pretty nice... although Chris is really weird now. And I also got to meet 2 people.. Kayla and Kara. They're both really awesome and nice. But also, 2 of my friends have cancelled plans with me. My best friend Lindsay made up some excuses not to come over, which was dumb. And Pat just couldn't hang out because of random reasons. So it's too bad I didn't see them yet. I'll probably be seeing lindsay some time this week. But I probably won't be seeing Pat for a really long time, because he'll be busy all this week and then he's moving out of his parents house. I'm so happy he is too. Everyone keeps telling him it's a bad idea, but he's *really* unhappy there. So I think he should just ignore everyone and do it. It will be a good experience for him.
So yeah, I really like being here with Luther. He's a great guy. He's just getting over his ex gf though, so I haven't asked him to be my boyfriend yet. I could any time, and he'd most likely say yes.. but he needs more time, so I'm going to wait. I don't even know if I should ask him out. I mean I'm going back to london in about a week.... so who knows what will happen. I mean, he asked me to move in with him, and I'm more than willing to do that... but it's more complicated than me just packing my stuff and moving. Because I'm worried about my schooling. I still need gr 10, 11, and 12. And I don't want to go back to a regular highschool. I could just go to his school... but won't it be hard? Because I'll need to have a job too, to pay for my food. Or I could just forget about school and just work. Or try doing homeschooling while I'm here. He's a teacher after all, so he could help me. But I'd really have to try hard to finish it all and to get up and follow through with the work on a regular basis. Which I could do.. it would just take a lot of effort. I'm also afraid that if I move here I won't be able to find a job. I suck at finding jobs. And if I can't find one, then I dunno... I mean he probably would pay for my food at first, but after a while I don't know if he still could.
So yes, I guess I just have to sort those three things out... food, school, and work.... and then everything will be fine.
But then there's the fact that I'm a complete commitment phobe. It seems like such a big thing to become his girlfriend and move in.. (oh and in case you don't know me in person which most of you don't, I live in london, and he lives in waterloo.. and those 2 cities are like an hour and a half away from each other... so if I want to be his gf (which I do) I can't just not move in). But I guess I could get over that. okay so there's 4 things I have to work through.... food, school, work, and my commitment phobia. I'm really not good at doing things long term, and this is something I would want to be long term... I don't want to mess everything up like I usually do.
Oh yeah, and then there's the fact that I would have to go home, quit my job, tell my dad I'm moving, pack my stuff and find a way to get it to Luther's. I'm sure my big sister could help me move my stuff though... since she has a car, and I don't have much stuff.
Oh yeah, and then there's the thing that because of the fact that him and his gf just broke up and he's not completely over her yet, I might just be a rebound.. so if that's the case, then moving in with him is not a good idea.
Arrg... so much stuff to sort out. food, school, work, commitment phobia, quitting job, packing stuff, finding away to move stuff, worrying about being a rebound.... It's becoming rather overwhelming.... but I like him so much. I think I love him... I mean, I can't even stand to be away from him for more than 5 minutes... and sometimes when he's like not even a meter away from me it feels like he's too far away.. which is really weird. Gah.. I guess I'll just have to work through all that stuff. Every realationship needs sacrifices right? Every relationship has things that need to be worked through right?
I guess the only thing I can do is give it a try.
Oh yeah... and I haven't gotten a chance to read anyone's Live journals lately... since I've been busy with Luther.. so I'll have to read them some other time.
PeAcE oUt DaWg! lol.