It starts
I've known for a while that my oldest son was going to give me trouble when it came to my sexuality. I know there are going to be heated discussions.
But what worries me more with him is his outlook on anyone who HE thinks is "in sin". He has said several times that this or that type of person shouldn't be allowed to live.
I forget how we got on the topic of genetics, but it was something to do with his asperger's syndrome. I was trying to make a distinction between what the asperger's causes that you can't control, and using asperger's as an excuse for doing certain things. This was all related to his brother's asperger's related behaviours.
I happen to know the bible quite well. I've studied it fairly regularly over a 17 year period. I even when to a school for biblical studies for 6 months with the intention to become a minister. Now, I wouldn't say I learned a lot from that 6 months, but there were some very important lessons in biblical interpretation and application that I remember to this day.
One of the most important is about "proof texting", how we shouldn't use this method in proving a point. This method involves using one scripture passage to prove a point. The use of one scripture reference, often taken out of context, is the leading method of intolerant people to put others down, or cast guilt, etc.
Another is to take one issue or concept and base a judgement of someone's standing with God as definitive of that's person's salvation. This requires forgetting so many other scriptures, and the examples of how Jesus treated others.
My oldest son lives with me. I like to think I'm rather easy going. But I have to admit when he gets like this I am tempted to tell him to go find somewhere else to live. I sometimes wonder if I tolerate too much from him. However, my understanding of Jesus' compassion and love for others compels me to put up with it. Plus, on some level I know it's partly because of his disability. I can't help wondering if his mother has something to do with the rest. She happens to have very black and white views on what is right and wrong. Although this could, for both of them, be a product of their psychological issues. FYI, she has clinical depression.
This afternoon I had to stop talking to him to calm myself down. It's been 45 minutes and I have yet to say anything to him about anything. I'm calm this time, but I have to wonder how long it is before I give in to my sinful side and retaliate? I'm tempted to become intolerant of his asperger's. I'm tempted to make things harder for him, like taking away the computer, or other things that he takes pleasure in. I don't want to come down to his level.
My job as a father is to teach him. I try. I feel inadequate. I keep hearing all the scriptures about not judging others (Matt 7, John 12). Unfortuately, he is going to be judged someday by others in a similar way to which he judges them. It's not going to be pretty. How to I help him survive in society?
This is a task God has given me. It is only by his grace I will accomplish something, this I know. Please pray for me.
But what worries me more with him is his outlook on anyone who HE thinks is "in sin". He has said several times that this or that type of person shouldn't be allowed to live.
I forget how we got on the topic of genetics, but it was something to do with his asperger's syndrome. I was trying to make a distinction between what the asperger's causes that you can't control, and using asperger's as an excuse for doing certain things. This was all related to his brother's asperger's related behaviours.
I happen to know the bible quite well. I've studied it fairly regularly over a 17 year period. I even when to a school for biblical studies for 6 months with the intention to become a minister. Now, I wouldn't say I learned a lot from that 6 months, but there were some very important lessons in biblical interpretation and application that I remember to this day.
One of the most important is about "proof texting", how we shouldn't use this method in proving a point. This method involves using one scripture passage to prove a point. The use of one scripture reference, often taken out of context, is the leading method of intolerant people to put others down, or cast guilt, etc.
Another is to take one issue or concept and base a judgement of someone's standing with God as definitive of that's person's salvation. This requires forgetting so many other scriptures, and the examples of how Jesus treated others.
My oldest son lives with me. I like to think I'm rather easy going. But I have to admit when he gets like this I am tempted to tell him to go find somewhere else to live. I sometimes wonder if I tolerate too much from him. However, my understanding of Jesus' compassion and love for others compels me to put up with it. Plus, on some level I know it's partly because of his disability. I can't help wondering if his mother has something to do with the rest. She happens to have very black and white views on what is right and wrong. Although this could, for both of them, be a product of their psychological issues. FYI, she has clinical depression.
This afternoon I had to stop talking to him to calm myself down. It's been 45 minutes and I have yet to say anything to him about anything. I'm calm this time, but I have to wonder how long it is before I give in to my sinful side and retaliate? I'm tempted to become intolerant of his asperger's. I'm tempted to make things harder for him, like taking away the computer, or other things that he takes pleasure in. I don't want to come down to his level.
My job as a father is to teach him. I try. I feel inadequate. I keep hearing all the scriptures about not judging others (Matt 7, John 12). Unfortuately, he is going to be judged someday by others in a similar way to which he judges them. It's not going to be pretty. How to I help him survive in society?
This is a task God has given me. It is only by his grace I will accomplish something, this I know. Please pray for me.