J2 Fic: To the Beat of Our Noisy Hearts (2/4)
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Art & Music
By midnight the party was already in full swing. Jensen sighed and pushed his way through the crowd, attempting to get closer to the keg in the kitchen. He didn't know half of the people here and large crowds always made him uncomfortable. Unfortunately, he couldn't go home to escape. This was his home.
"Do you even know all of these people?" Jensen yelled at Mike, struggling to be heard over the noise.
"Nah, but that's the beauty of it all," Mike shouted. "Here, have more beer! Drink! Mingle! Get to know someone new!"
Jensen accepted the beer from Mike with a silent glare. Mingle? Yeah, right. Jensen was starting to feel claustrophobic in the small apartment. The air was stuffy, scented with a heady combination of perfume, aftershave, and sweat. It was time to make an escape. "Get me the case from the fridge."
Mike's grin widened as he opened the fridge and pulled out the beer, handing the case over to Jensen. "Now that's what I'm talking about!"
Jensen rolled his eyes and headed for the door. The party had spilled outdoors already but Jensen saw that his favorite spot by the old Oak tree was blissfully unoccupied. He slumped down on the ground and leaned back against the rough bark.
Jensen let his head fall back and closed his eyes. He could feel the vibrations from the heavy bass through the ground beneath him. He hoped the cops didn't get called. If they did, he planned to be long gone. This was Mike's party. Jensen wanted nothing to do with it.
"You mind if I join you?"
Jensen opened his eyes and found himself staring at a familiar brunette. He took a drink and motioned to the ground next to him.
The girl took a seat and sighed. "It's a little overwhelming in there right now. Hope I'm not bothering you but this seems to be the only quiet place around here."
"It's fine," Jensen replied with a shrug, taking another drink, his eyes never leaving her face.
The girl blushed. "I'm Sandy, by the way," she said, holding out her hand.
"Jensen," he replied, taking her small hand in his. "So Sandy, what brings you out here?"
"To the party?" Sand asked. At Jensen's nod, she continued, "It's Saturday night, where else would I be?"
Jensen shrugged again, not really having an answer for her.
"Actually, I was planning to meet a friend here but I haven't seen him yet. And he's pretty hard to miss."
Jensen smirked. "Tall guy? Shaggy brown hair?" Big laugh?"
Sandy smiled and looked around. "That would be him. Is he here? Have you seen him?"
"Haven't seen him tonight," Jensen admitted, frowning slightly. He had almost forgotten that Mike had said Jared would be at the party and the butterflies in his stomach struck once again at the reminder. "I just saw you with him yesterday in the cafeteria."
Sandy was quiet for a minute before groaning. "Oh god, you saw him carry me in, didn't you?" Jensen chuckled as a look of pure horror crossed her face. "You did, didn't you?"
Jensen popped the top off a bottle of beer and handed it to her. "That was some entrance you two made."
Sandy flushed and took a long drink. "I'm going to kill him," she muttered. "So what brings you out here?"
Jensen smirked around his bottle at the obvious change in subject. "Me? I live here."
"So you live with Mike? Are you the boyfriend I've heard so much about?" Sandy questioned.
Jensen choked on his beer. "Me and Mike? Are you crazy?" Jensen could feel his face heat up. "No. I don't really swing that way. Why would you think we were together?"
Sandy's eyebrows drew together and her cheeks grew pink. "I'm sorry. Jared is always talking about Mike's boyfriend. Said it was really serious so I just thought-"
"That would be Tom," Jensen replied, cutting her off. "Serious in all the ways except living together."
Sandy laughed. "Tom?" When Jensen nodded, she brought a hand up to cover her mouth. "Oops!"
Jensen shook his head, slightly amused by her assumption.
"So you're straight?" Sandy asked, fingers tearing at the label on her bottle.
"Last I checked," Jensen answered. He wondered for a moment why she seemed so shocked.
"Well, that sucks," Sandy mumbled before taking another drink.
"Come again?" Jensen figured he couldn't have heard her right. The entire conversation was bordering on bizarre. He tossed his empty bottle aside and reached for another one.
"Oh nothing," Sandy replied, her voice quiet. She shifted uncomfortably. "Well, it was nice meeting you, Jensen, but I should probably go check on Jared. He should've been here by now and it's not like him to just not show up."
Jensen nodded as she stood up. He watched as she chewed on her lower lip, obviously wanting to say something more. She just gave a little shrug of her shoulders and headed toward the house with a wave of her hand.
Jensen watched her go and thought about their odd meeting. His chest tightened as he recalled that earlier afternoon at the Kane concert. He had been watching Jared again but this time Sandy had caught him staring.
"Oh god," Jensen moaned. That had to be the reason why she seemed so surprised that he wasn't gay. She had caught him watching her boyfriend and assumed-
Jensen reached for his beer and tilted his head back, letting the cold brew wash his brief moment of panic away. One thing was for sure. He wasn't drunk enough yet.
By the time the party had died down to a dull roar, Jensen had a decent buzz and was feeling pretty good. Until Mike showed up, that is. Jensen was sprawled out on the ground, staring up at the sky through glassy eyes when Mike's bald head popped into his line of sight, disrupting his view.
"Jenny!"
"Don't call me Jenny, fucker," Jensen glared at his friend before snorting back a laugh. He would have smacked him but then he would have to move.
"-get her number at least?" Mike's voice cut through the cottony haze of Jensen's mind.
"What number?" Jensen stared at Mike, utterly confused.
"The hot chick you were out here with," Mike explained, flopping down on the ground next to him. "Did you get her number?"
Jensen stared at the sky as his mind rolled. The only girl he'd really talked to was Sandy. "Jared's girlfriend? No."
Jensen could feel Mike's eyes on him as he turned his head to the side. "Jared's girlfriend?" Mike repeated, turning back to the sky. "As in Padalecki?"
"Do you know another Jared?" Jensen grumbled, his good mood vanishing into the shadows as he thought about laughing hazel eyes and dimples too deep to be real. He didn't want to think about Jared at all. He had managed to forget the kid for awhile but life seemed determined to keep bringing him up.
"Dude, Jared doesn't have a girlfriend," Mike laughed. "Unless he's married to the music. Which, knowing Jared, he just might be."
Jensen glared at his friend and ignored him.
"Bastard was supposed to be here," Mike said after a few minutes of silence. He tilted his head again to look at Jensen, a frown on his face. His eyes narrowed a bit as he stared at his roommate. "Why are you so hung up on Padalecki, man?"
"I'm not," Jensen covered his eyes with his arm. "Just said I was talking to his girl."
"And I said he doesn't have a girl," Mike stated, odd emphasis on the word 'girl.' "I want to know why you went from happy drunk to jealous bitch when his name was mentioned."
"I didn't," Jensen argued. He tried to play back their conversation but his mind was fuzzy with the details. "Whatever," he growled, dragging his body up to a seated position.
"Jen, I know you, man. You haven't sounded this irritated for no apparent reason since Kim and-" Mike sat up next to Jensen and started laughing. "Why Jenny, do you have a crush on Jared Padalecki?"
"Maybe," Jensen muttered. He immediately cursed his alcohol-loosened tongue. He pulled his legs up and let his head drop to his knees, hoping to hide his face, hoping to keep some of his secrets to himself.
Mike swallowed his laugh and sat in silence, his head surveying the ground around them. "You should let me introduce you to him," he finally said, voice calm and even.
Jensen turned his head away from his roommate and picked at a blade of grass. He didn't trust his voice so he shook his head. The entire day had been one humiliating event after another whenever Jared was involved. His name alone made Jensen's stomach twist. "I can't talk to him," Jensen finally said in a rough whisper, hoping his friend wouldn't hear.
No such luck. "Of course you can," Mike encouraged. "You just need the right situation."
Jensen sat up and stared at Mike. "Yeah right," he scoffed.
"I'm serious," Mike held up his hands. He scratched at his chin. "You tutoring on Monday night?"
Jensen shrugged, the alcohol in his system making him feel sluggish. "Supposed to."
"Good," Mike replied with a grin. "Give me a call at the station on your way home. I have an idea. Just need to work out the details."
Jensen stared hard at his roommate. There was an evil twinkle in Mike's eyes and from past experience, Jensen knew he was in trouble. He also knew there was no escaping Mike when he got into planning mode.
"Fine," he sighed, shaking his head at Mike's delighted whoop.
This couldn't be good.
xxxxxx
"How did I let you talk me into this again?" Jared leaned back in his chair and stretched his arms, mindful of the boom mike hanging above him.
Mike looked up from the computer and smirked. "Because you promised to come to my party, decided not to show, didn't call, and made me worry?"
"I fell asleep!" Jared argued. He had gone home on Saturday planning to take a nap. The next thing he remembered was Sandy pounding on his door Sunday morning. He didn't even remember turning his phone off.
"Sure," Mike dismissed his statement with a wave of his hand. "Whatever, man. You owe me."
Jared leaned forward and dropped his head on the desk. Mike had shown up for his shift half an hour ago and immediately laid on the guilt. Jared hadn't stood a chance. He looked up at his co-worker through his bangs, silently pleading for mercy.
Mike chuckled and shook his head. "This will be fun," he promised Jared before pushing a button and pulling the mike closer to his face. "It's 9:30 on Monday night and you all know what that means. It's time for this week's 'Lust Connection' and I have a special treat for those of you listening."
Jared groaned and pulled on his headphones, glaring at Mike as he waited for his cue.
"This week we have our very own celebrity guest, one of campus's most eligible bachelors, my fellow jockey Jared Padalecki."
Mike nodded at Jared and flipped the switch, turning on the second mike. Jared rolled his eyes, "Hey y'all. Go easy on me, ok. If you don't, we'll be looking for yet another DJ after Mike's untimely demise."
'The Lust Connection' was Mike's answer to the cheesy 80's dating show, 'The Love Connection.' Each Monday started things off with one student acting as the bachelor (or bachelorette) and three callers were chosen as that week's suitors. They would be given three questions and three minutes. Based on their answers, the listeners were encouraged to call in and vote for which suitor the bachelor should choose. The winning suitor got to choose where the date would take place. The dates rarely ended up as anything more than one night stands but the student body loved 'The Lust Connection.' Mike had been after Jared to participate for months but he had never given in. Until now.
"We'll be taking the first three callers, so if you want the once-in-a-lifetime chance to worship at the Padalecki altar up close and personal, give us a call. Lines will open up right after this commercial break."
Jared smacked Mike's arm, his mouth twisting in a rare frown. "The Padalecki altar? You're such a dick."
Mike shrugged and hummed to himself. "I just call it like I see it. And everyone wants a piece of you." Jared shook his head but Mike just pointed at the switchboard, lights lit up across the board. "See."
The commercial break was nearly over so Mike picked up the first line. He asked the person to hold and moved to the second. Jared gave Mike a strange look as he hung up on caller three and four. He then picked up the fifth and smiled. "Hey! Can you wait just a second?" he asked the person on the line. "Dude, it'll just be a minute. Relax!"
"And we're back with this week's bachelor, Jared. Now let's find out who might get lucky enough to score with Jay," Mike reached over and punched the button for line one. "Caller number one, who might you be?"
"This is Erica," the familiar feminine voice said. "Jared, I thought you were going to meet me at the concert. But don't worry, you can make it up to me this Saturday."
Mike stifled his laughter behind a closed fist as Jared rolled his eyes and dropped his head onto his arms. "Alright Erica, just hold on the line while we find out who our other contestants are. Caller number two, state your name, rank, and measurements."
"Um, ok," the girl started. "My name is Allison. I'm a junior. And, um-"
Jared jumped up and reached over the board, punching the button to activate his mike. "Allison, ignore Mike," he interrupted her. "Nice to meet you." He shot a glare at his friend as he sat back down.
Mike chuckled and punched line three. "This is Mike."
"Hey Mike," the guy on the line said. "You said to-"
"Jenny! Is that you?" Mike shouted. Jared narrowed his eyes. Mike was up to something.
"Yeah, of course it is. You said-" the guy continued.
"Well, you lucked out, man, because you're caller number three," Mike interrupted.
A heavy sigh sounded across the line. "It's Monday, isn't it?"
Jared shook his head. Sounded like he wasn't the only one conned into being a part of this week's edition of 'Lust Connection.' His mind raced and the name clicked. "Jenny? You're Mike's roommate?"
"It's Jensen, actually," the guy replied. "And sadly yes."
"Oh man, I'm so sorry," Jared said with a laugh. "I just have to work with the guy. And I always thought you were a girl."
"He always calls me Jenny, doesn't he?" Jensen asked. There was a pause. "And are we on the air?"
"Yes on both counts," Jared answered.
Mike jumped in before Jensen could curse his name to hell and back. "You're caller number three, man. And we here pride ourselves on being equal opportunists so you have a shot at a date Saturday with my man Jared."
"I do, do I?" Jared laughed at the obvious sarcasm. "Better than a date with you, man."
"You should be so lucky," Mike said interrupting him. "You all know how this works. I'll ask three questions and you have one minute to answer. After each one of you has answered the question, Jared will give you his answers. Three questions, three minutes. That's all the time you have to convince the listeners to vote for you. Just answer honestly. No one likes a cheat." Jared pretended to fall asleep as Mike rattled through the rules. Mike swatted at him and asked the first question. "Erica, what is your idea of the perfect date?"
"The perfect date for me would be a huge concert at one of the coolest venues," Erica replied. "Loud music, lots of people, and just spending time with that special someone. Then we could dance all night at one of the clubs downtown. Our ears would be ringing for hours."
Jared cringed. Concerts were always a good time, but he really wasn't into the club scene. Mike looked like he was trying not to laugh. Jared just knew he was remembering the last time Jared had 'danced' in public. There had been a lot of alcohol involved. A lot of alcohol. Jared glared at Mike. His coworker coughed into his fist. "Ok Allison, how about you?"
"I like to eat out so my best date would start at a restaurant, preferably one with a decent salad bar," Allison's voice was quiet and breathy. Jared was tempted to ask her to speak up but remained silent as she continued. "After dinner we'd go see whatever was playing at the theater. I love plays, especially musicals."
Jared shrugged a shoulder when Mike glanced his way. Still not really his idea of a good time, but he wasn't completely opposed to the idea. "And Jensen?"
Jensen's voice was a low rumble. "I've never really been one to do anything fancy," Jensen admitted. "My idea of a good time is catching a show at one of the bars downtown. We have a decent music scene that no one seems to know about. Live music, cold beer, and a good friend is all I need."
Jared smiled. He liked this guy. "Guess it's my turn," he said before Mike could prompt him. "I'm a dinner and movie kind of guy. As long as dinner is some hole-in-the-wall diner with great food and the movie is a rental watched at home. I also like parties and hanging with my friends. I just want the person I'm with to be comfortable enough with me to relax. Life has enough stress."
"And now for question two," Mike broke in when Jared had finished. "If you were given $50 to spend on anything right now, what would you buy?"
Jared mind wandered a bit as Erica ran through a million possibilities, all things she just couldn't live without. Finally she settled on shoes. Allison started blabbering on and on about this painting she desperately wanted for her living room. Jared shook his head and dropped forward, resting his forehead on the desk. If he was forced to spend an evening with one of these girls, he had no idea what they'd talk about.
"-and a couple boxes of guitar strings, since my roommate always seems to be losing mine."
"Now Jenny-"
"You play guitar?" Jared asked, focused on the show once more.
"Yeah, I've been playing since I was a teenager," Jensen admitted.
"You any good?"
"I'm not bad, I guess." Jared smiled. He didn't even know this guy but he guessed he was shrugging. "How about you? What would you do with $50?"
"Hmmmm," Jared pretended to think about his answer. "That's easy. There's this music fest coming up this summer down in Dakota that-"
"Man, that is going to be one hell of a weekend," Jensen interrupted. "Did you see the lineup? I know a couple of the bands that are playing and they're incredible. My buddy Chris will be there so I'm trying to go, show my support."
"Yeah, I heard they got Kyle Young to play this year," Jared couldn't keep the excitement out of his voice. "That guy's awesome and I've been wanting to check out his live show forever. You know, maybe we-"
Mike cleared his throat and shot Jared a pointed stare. Jared mumbled an apology and Mike smirked. "Last question: Favorite music?"
"Ooh, that's tough," Erica complained. "I'd have to say right now it's Fall Out Boy. The lead singer is hot and their music is just so much fun. I like pretty much anything with a beat. Something I can dance to."
Of course, Jared mouthed to Mike. Allison hummed to herself as she thought about her answer, finally settling on Top 40. "But I listen to a lot of classical music when I'm studying," she rushed on. Jared shrugged at Mike again. He wasn't really surprised by the responses.
"Ok, Jenny, your turn," Mike prompted his roommate.
"Stop calling me Jenny," Jensen muttered before answering the question. "I have to go with singer/songwriters. I respect them a lot because they put so much of themselves into their music."
"And Jared?" Mike smirked.
Jared glared at his friend. "I hate you, Mike. Obviously I listen to a little bit of everything. I can never narrow down a favorite because that changes at any given time. But I avoid a lot of the popular stuff because it's often overplayed. I just love music that has something to say, something that makes you feel, that gets to you."
Mike punched a button, cutting off lines. "There you have it, dear listeners. Who should Jared choose? Who cares? You have the power to say who he should date. So let's have it. Call those votes in and tune in tomorrow to find out who the winner is. We'll be back after this commercial break."
As Mike took down the necessary information about the contestants, Jared checked to make sure the answering system was working properly before reaching over and picking up the third line. "Jensen?"
"Yeah?" Jensen sounded a bit startled to hear Jared again.
"So what's this asshole got on you?" Jared asked, voice teasing.
Jensen chuckled. "Nothing, really. Just told me to call. I should've remembered it was Monday."
Jared tucked the phone between his shoulder and ear and spun around in his chair. "You know," he finally said, "I think he was a snake in a former life." Jared laughed as Mike flipped him off, still focused on his work.
Jensen laughed and the sound sent a spark down Jared's spine. Jensen had a nice laugh, open and free. "How'd you get to be the lucky bachelor?"
Jared groaned. "Slept through his party."
"That's why you weren't there?"
"Yeah," Jared replied. "You were there?"
"I kinda live there, Jared," Jensen gently reminded.
"Oh yeah, forgot that for a moment," Jared said. "How is it we've never met before? We've never met before, have we?"
"Nah, we've never met."
Jared yawned, his exhaustion taking its toll once again. "Well, we should definitely meet. Anyway, I'm about to fall asleep here so I should go. Need to make it back to the dorms in one piece, preferably semi-conscious."
"Yeah, sounds like a good idea," Jensen said, his voice a bit quieter.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow, though," Jared pointed out. He definitely wanted to get to know the guy better. They had mutual friends and it seemed like they had some things in common. "We need to plan our revenge on Mike."
Jensen snorted. "He's going down."
"Fuck yeah, he is," Jared agreed. He yawned again and grasped the phone to keep it from falling. "Night, Jensen."
"Night, Jared."
xxxxxx
"Your boyfriend is a dead man."
Tom laughed at Jensen's empty threat. "I caught the show last night. And from the sound of it, I really don't think you mean that."
Jensen groaned. He hadn't really expected to receive support from Tom but he had hoped. He should have known Mike was up to something. He'd been too nice, too quiet, since Jensen made that drunken confession Saturday night. But Jensen hadn't paid attention and wound up getting blindsided. He thought back over the too-short conversation last night with Jared and his heart thumped a little harder.
"Jen?" Tom's voice broke into his thoughts, snapping him back to the present.
"Yeah," he replied. "Sorry, what was that?"
"You do like Jared, don't you?" Tom asked. "I mean, the other day it seemed-"
"Maybe," Jensen admitted. "I'm not sure. How did you know you were-"
He was interrupted by the call waiting. "Hang on, Tom." He clicked over. "Hello?"
"Jensen?"
Jensen's breath caught. He knew that voice. "Jared?"
Jared chuckled. "Yeah. Hope you don't mind me calling. I was just gettin' bored sitting around here and I said I'd call. But if you're busy-"
"No," Jensen jumped in, kicking himself for sounding too eager. He had to admit he was surprised. When Jared had said he'd call, he had figured that was just his way of saying good-bye. "Just a second. I'll be right back." Jensen switched back. "Hey Tom, I gotta go. I'll talk to you later."
"Tell Jared hi for me," Tom said with a laugh.
"How did you-" he started but Tom was gone. He sighed and pressed the pound button. "Ok, I'm back."
Jensen frowned as he was met with silence. He hoped Jared hadn't thought he was...god, could he sound more like a girl? After waiting for a minute with no response, Jensen was getting ready to hang up the phone but stopped when he heard Jared's voice pouring through the stereo speakers. He introduced the next song set and the music started up.
"Jensen?"
Jensen smiled, ridiculously pleased just hearing Jared say his name. "Yeah, I'm here."
"Sorry 'bout that," Jared apologized. "I didn't realize how close I was to the commercial break."
"That's ok," Jensen replied. There was a moment of quiet as his mind raced for something to say. Jensen wasn't a big fan of phones. They always made him a bit uncomfortable.
"I have to tell you something," Jared said, voice low, as if telling him a secret. "I don't really like talking on the phone. I mean, I like to talk but the phone is just so impersonal. It's hard to tell what someone is thinking when you can't see them."
"Man, I'm the same way," Jensen let out a deep breath. He felt oddly relieved that Jared wasn't completely comfortable either. "And talking to Mike on the phone never works. I need the instant gratification of being able to slap him upside the head when he says something stupid."
Jared laughed, the sound warm and comforting. "Yeah, well I tend to overcompensate by talking way too much. Feel free to tell me to shut up at any time."
Jensen smiled as Jared launched into a discussion about his little sister and how they both always had to have the last word and the only way their mother could get them to stop arguing was to pull out the duct tape. Or something like that. Jensen got a bit lost, paying more attention to the fast cadence of his words than the words themselves. Jared hadn't been lying when he said he talked a lot, but Jensen didn't really mind. It wasn't long before Jared had drawn him into the conversation and they were discussing everything from their childhood ambitions to life as the middle child to their favorite places to eat in town.
"Oh wow," Jared stopped mid-sentence. "I'll be right back."
Jensen stood up and stretched before heading into the kitchen for something to drink. He glanced at the clock on the wall and was shocked to see that he had been on the phone with Jared for nearly an hour. Conversation had been flowing smooth and easy, the only interruptions were those for Jared to deal with studio business. Jensen just felt comfortable talking to Jared and found himself opening up more than he usually would to someone he had technically just met. They were already talking like old friends.
The stereo was on but turned down low, the sound muffled as Jensen reached into the fridge for a beer. He closed the door and headed back into the living room, smiling at the low rumble of Jared's voice as he came out of a commercial break and set up the next song set.
"So y'all know about Mike's game 'The Lust Connection' and how he finally convinced me to participate. Well, tonight at nine we find out the results of who you all picked for me. But I decided to take advantage of my position here to let you all know who I'd choose, if given the chance. So Jensen, the next set of songs is for you. It has your name all over it."
Jensen sat back down in his chair with a heavy thump as the music began to play. Jared had just announced to everyone listening that he'd choose him if he could. Jensen wasn't quite sure how to handle that. He tucked the phone under his ear and waited for Jared to get back on the line.
"Still there?"
"Yeah," Jensen mumbled.
"So," Jared paused, suddenly sounding more nervous than Jensen had ever heard him before. "What do you think about my little tribute?"
Jensen listened closer to the music that was playing in the background. Recognizing the song, he groaned. "Jenny? Seriously?"
Jared laughed and any uneasiness that might have existed quickly disappeared. "Hey man, there isn't exactly a lot out there with your name. I had to improvise."
"Just don't make it a habit," Jensen warned. He paused just a moment and before he could stop himself, he blurted out the question he wanted answered the most.
"Why me?"
"Oh," Jared was quiet for a moment before continuing. "Why not? You sound like someone I'd get along with, we have a lot of the same friends, and you'd beat a girl any day."
Jensen felt his face heat up. "Why's that?"
"Well...I'm gay," Jared admitted. "It's not really a secret or anything, I just don't advertise it that much."
"Oh," Jensen replied. He deflated a bit, wondering if Jared had chosen him simply because he was a guy.
Jared seemed to sense the shift of Jensen's thoughts. "Jensen, I'd have chosen you anyway," he rushed to assure him. "This may sound weird or incredibly girly or whatever, but I feel like I've known you forever. There's just this-"
"Connection?" Jensen finished for him as he took a swig from his beer bottle.
"Yeah," Jared exhaled. "That's weird, right?"
Jensen thought about the past 24 hours, the smooth flow of conversation and his easy acceptance of everything that had been thrown his way. Normally, Jensen would sit back and try to analyze all the various angles of a situation before making a move. But this time, he was simply going with the flow. "Nah," he finally said.
"Good," Jared huffed out a relieved sigh.
Jensen felt it was time for a subject change. "So Mike was saying that you guys had a few interviews set up today for the open DJ slot. Did you find anyone?"
"We did, actually," Jared replied. "Thank god. I'm really getting tired of all the doubles. I'll work with the new guy the next three days and hopefully he'll be ready to go on his own on Monday."
Jensen listened as Jared rambled on about the new guy, Justin. He was a senior majoring in engineering who just happened to have radio experience, was a baseball player, and had a mutt that he rescued from the pound.
And likes long walks on the beach. Jensen added, silently to himself. Every time he began to feel the slightest bit jealous as Jared went on and on about the new guy, he'd hear one song end and the next 'Jenny' song begin to play. Smiling was inevitable.
"Hey, I'll be back in just a second," Jared muttered.
Jensen could hear a low murmur through the phone. "Nice tribute." Jensen immediately recognized his roommate's voice.
"Yeah, well, you know me," Jared's slow drawl was muffled. Jensen pictured Jared's long fingers wrapped around the mouthpiece, pressing lightly against the plastic.
Mike sounded amused. "So, you have a thing for my roommate? Because I'd like to know just what your intentions are."
Jensen strained to hear Jared's response but it was distorted and faint. He'd just have to ask Mike later. Jensen shuddered when he realized how much he sounded like Mackenzie and her girlfriends. Give him another week and he'd be passing notes to Jared through his friends. Do you like me? Check yes or no.
"Sit down, shut up, and call those girls," Jared's voice was suddenly loud and clear.
Jensen could hear Mike muttering in the background as he did what he was told. "Let me guess, you're going to call Jensen?"
"Something like that," Jared replied. There was a moment of silence and Jensen almost laughed. He could hear the moment that Mike realized the truth.
"You're already talking to him!" Mike hollered, his voice a laughing accusation.
"So what?" Jared argued. "Swing that mike over here, will you? Still there?"
Jensen realized that Jared was talking to him again. "Still here. If Mike says anything else remind him that I know where he sleeps."
Jared laughed. "I'll do that. So, you ready to get this whole game over with?"
"Is that all I am to you?" Jensen huffed. "A game?"
"I didn't mean it like that," Jared rushed.
"Relax, I'm kidding," Jensen laughed. Jared's mumbled 'told you I hate the phone' only made him laugh harder.
"Your radio turned down?" Jared asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"Less feedback," he responded before segueing into the close of his show. There was an odd sense of surround sound as Jensen heard Jared loud and clear in his ear, his voice echoing quieter in the background. "And now I'm handing this over to Mike while I sit here and await my fate."
"Just for that, I should hold the results until later," Mike joked. "But I'm a nice guy so I won't do that to you."
Jensen and Jared both snorted at that. "He wouldn't know nice if it bit him in the ass," Jensen said.
"Yeah, thanks Jenny," Mike replied.
Jensen's eyes widened. "Jared, you could have told me I was on the air."
"Sorry?"
"You'll just have to make it up to me later," Jensen grumbled, shaking his head in embarrassment.
"What do you say we get this show on the road?" Mike interrupted and Jensen could hear the smirk in his voice. Before anyone could say anything, he continued. "Erica, Allison, you both there?"
Both girls answered in the affirmative and Jared greeted them warmly. "Ok Mike, let's get on with this."
"Patience, patience," Mike muttered. He cleared his throat. "First, I'd just like to say that last night we had more votes than ever before. My man Jared here may just go down in history on this show. Now, for the results...with 86 percent of the votes, the winner is....Jensen."
"That's not fair!" Erica cried as the result was announced.
"Excuse me?" Mike sounded shocked. "How is it not fair?"
"You rigged the results! The guy's your roommate! Of course he won."
Jensen could almost hear Mike grinding his teeth at the mere suggestion that he'd do anything to lessen his show's integrity. "I'm sorry, but there is no questioning the results. I don't have anything to do with tallying the votes. We have two volunteers who work at the studio who deal with all the phone lines. If you have problems with the votes, I suggest you take it up with them."
"Fine! I will!" Erica said before hanging up.
"Ok then," Jared huffed a small laugh. "I'd just like to thank the listeners for sparing me the drama."
"I have to say I'm not sad it isn't me, but I hope you have a good time with Jensen, Jared," Allison made her peace and hung up on a positive note.
"Well that was fun," Jensen muttered. He was still a bit shocked that so many people had called in and voted for him.
"So Jensen, any ideas what you two will do on Saturday?" Mike asked, obviously trying not to laugh. Jensen planned all the ways he would hurt his roommate later.
"Um...I'll have to get back to you on that," Jensen said. His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. He was going to actually spend time with Jared, one-on-one. He definitely needed to think about it before making plans.
"We done here?" Jared asked and Jensen almost answered before he realized that Jared was talking to Mike.
"That's it," Mike agreed.
"In that case, I'd like to say goodnight for now," Jared said. "And be sure to tune in tomorrow at 3 for your first chance to hear our newest DJ, Justin. Until tomorrow, I'm out of here."
Jensen waited for a moment until Jared spoke again. "Jen? We're off the air, now."
"Thank god," Jensen muttered.
"So it looks like it's you and me on Saturday," Jared pointed out. "And just so you know, I expect dinner first if you expect me to put out."
Jensen sputtered, "Man, I don't-"
Jared's laughter interrupted him. "Jen, it's cool. I was kidding." Jensen took a deep breath, trying to slow his heart rate. "You just figure out what you want to do and I'm up for whatever. But now I should probably go. I have to get some homework done before I pass out."
"Yeah?" Jensen hoped he didn't sound too sad about ending their conversation. He'd had a good night just talking. It had been awhile since he'd felt that kind of connection to anyone. "Ok."
"I'll be working with Justin until 7," Jared told him. "Call me here around 7:30?"
Jensen smiled. "Sure, I can do that."
"Great! Talk to you then!"
Jensen hung up the phone and tossed it onto the coffee table. He caught sight of his reflection in the glass, a goofy smile plastered across his face.
Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.
xxxxxx
The knock at the door was a bit unexpected. Jared was tempted to just ignore it and go back to sleep but he groaned and rolled himself out of bed. He could always sleep when he was dead.
The heavy wood door swung open to reveal Sophia, her eyes rimmed with red and her hair a mess. It didn't take a scientist to know that that something was wrong. Sophia never left the sorority house looking anything less than her absolute best.
"Hey," Jared said, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the room. He wrapped his arms around her tiny frame and held her close. She buried her face into his shirt and took a breath, her shoulders hitching with a contained sob.
Sophia pulled back and dabbed at her eyes. "Sorry," she sniffled. "I know you don't have class on Friday afternoon and you were probably sleeping. But I ...I just really needed someone to talk to."
Jared released an internal sigh. He really had been looking forward to that nap. But some things were simply more important. He jumped up onto the bed and leaned back against the wall. A pat on the mattress next to him was all it took for Sophia to climb up next to him.
Jared wrapped his arm around the pretty brunette and tucked her head under his chin. "So what did he do?"
"What did who do?" Sophia tried to sound confused but Jared wasn't buying it.
"Soph," he coaxed, his voice low and soothing, "Just tell me. I promise you'll feel better if you do."
Sophia played with the frayed ends of Jared's shirt, twirling a loose thread around her finger. "I saw him with her. He told me he was sorry and that he'd never do it again. But when I said no, he was back with her like I never even mattered."
Jared swallowed down the instant anger he felt towards his best friend. "I'm sorry," he told her. "Chad's an asshole."
"You're just saying that because you're my friend," Sophia replied, staring at the wall opposite the bed.
Jared followed her gaze to the big breasted model with the vacant 'I'm supposed to be sexy' smile staring back at them from a poster and frowned. "No, I'm saying that because it's the truth. Chad's my best friend and I love him like a brother, but he fucked up," Jared pulled his head back far enough to look down at her. "You deserve better."
Sophia curled her body into Jared's and drew her knee up to rest on his leg. Jared rubbed circles into the small of her back, hoping to give her a small amount of comfort.
Two weeks ago, life had been perfect for the campus golden couple. Even after two years together, they still acted like newlyweds on their honeymoon. They were sickeningly sweet, but it was nice. Then Chad ruined it all by getting drunk and sleeping with another friend's little sister. Sophia had literally caught him with his pants down. Jared wasn't about to cut him any slack. Chad had something special with Sophia. She loved him despite all his faults but it didn't seem to be enough.
"Do you think I should have forgiven him?" Sophia asked, her voice soft and low as if afraid of his answer.
"No, I really don't," Jared told her. He sat back and watched shadows dance across the walls as tree limbs outside the window swayed in the breeze. "I think Chad was extremely lucky to have you for as long as he did. He doesn't really know how to handle good things in his life, never has. It's like he has to go out of his way to screw them up. It's no excuse, just how he is. But he had something rare and special and still managed to fuck it up. He hurt you and I can't agree with him there. It puts me in an extremely awkward position because I know he feels bad, but I know how I'd feel, so-"
Sophia looked up at Jared with a watery smile. "Why do all the good guys have to be gay?"
Jared stared down at her. "Been talking to Sandy?" She nodded and Jared grinned. "Just lucky, I guess." He sighed. "Soph, any guy would be lucky to have you. Try not to forget that."
Sophia sniffled and resumed her intense examination of the hem of Jared's shirt. "Sorry I added you to the Bachelor list," she said. "I know you get embarrassed by the attention. But I just wanted to make everyone aware of how special you are. Any guy would be lucky to have you, too, you know."
Jared shrugged. "It's not so bad, actually. I don't know how you managed to convince everyone that you weren't completely crazy, but some good things have come out of that poll."
Sophia tilted her head up to stare at him, her brown eyes wide. She tried to hide her satisfied smile. "You're talking about Mike's show, aren't you? That Jensen guy?"
Jared ducked his head, blushing at the mention of Jensen's name. "Maybe," he admitted. He tried to make that one word sound completely casual but he knew he had failed miserably. Sophia elbowed him in the ribs, silently urging him to continue.
"I really like him, Soph," he finally said. "I haven't even met him in person yet but there's definitely something there." Jared went on to tell her how they'd talked every day since the show on Monday, discussing anything and everything that came to mind. His face heated up with every admission but he couldn't stop the words from flowing.
"Awwww, aren't you adorable," Sophia offered a small smile, obviously trying to avoid making him feel more embarrassed than he already did. Her eyes narrowed a bit as she watched him. "Why do I get the feeling that there is a 'but' in there somewhere?"
Jared bit his lip. "Jensen is great and I really do like him," he repeated. "But...there's this other guy I can't stop thinking about."
Sophia raised an eyebrow. "Another guy? You been holding out on me? Who is this mystery man?"
"That's just it, he's a mystery."
Jared explained about the gorgeous guy at the Kane concert. He told Sophia how he had been trying to find out who the guy was since that day. Jared had watched the same 30 second clip time and time again while editing footage for his video. He saw the strong profile and short light brown hair every time he slept. He kept looking, but so far he'd had no luck. He'd tried asking Tom but he'd been rather evasive.
Sophia frowned and shook her head. "Jared, I love you, but you've got to make a decision here."
"I know, he replied, miserable at the idea of choosing. "I really don't know what to do."
"Are you kidding me?" Sophia smacked his arm and pulled away. She sat up and stared at him. "God, boys are so stupid sometimes."
"What?" Jared couldn't stop the low growl that escaped. He just didn't get girls.
"So there are these two guys. One of them is pretty much perfect for you. He's intelligent, interesting, and there is definitely a connection even though you've never seen him."
Jared nodded when Sophia gave him a pointed look, obviously expecting some sort of response.
"And then there is another guy who you really don't know anything about except he's very, very pretty," Sophia added, emphasis on 'pretty' combined with a raised brow. "Jared, you don't even know if he goes to school here or if he was just here for the concert!"
"Well, when you put it that way," Jared could feel his face heating up yet again. She had a point. Jensen was incredible and the other guy...well, he could be a complete asshole for all Jared knew.
Sophia huffed and threw up her hands. "Like I said. Stupid."
Jared scratched the back of his neck. "I'm being ridiculous, aren't I?"
Sophia shrugged and curled back up against him. "That's what you have me for. Honestly, I think you're just scared because things are already going so well with Jensen. He really seems to get you and it scares you. Just stop being an idiot and go with it."
Jared reached for the remote to his stereo and turned up the music, Maroon 5 filling the room. Sophia burrowed down into the blankets on the bed, snuggling closer to Jared. She rested her head on his shoulder, her palm warm against his stomach. "I'm keeping you, aren't I? You probably want to go back to sleep or something."
"Nah," Jared tightened his arm around her shoulders and closed his eyes. "Right now I'm exactly where I need to be."
Part Three
By midnight the party was already in full swing. Jensen sighed and pushed his way through the crowd, attempting to get closer to the keg in the kitchen. He didn't know half of the people here and large crowds always made him uncomfortable. Unfortunately, he couldn't go home to escape. This was his home.
"Do you even know all of these people?" Jensen yelled at Mike, struggling to be heard over the noise.
"Nah, but that's the beauty of it all," Mike shouted. "Here, have more beer! Drink! Mingle! Get to know someone new!"
Jensen accepted the beer from Mike with a silent glare. Mingle? Yeah, right. Jensen was starting to feel claustrophobic in the small apartment. The air was stuffy, scented with a heady combination of perfume, aftershave, and sweat. It was time to make an escape. "Get me the case from the fridge."
Mike's grin widened as he opened the fridge and pulled out the beer, handing the case over to Jensen. "Now that's what I'm talking about!"
Jensen rolled his eyes and headed for the door. The party had spilled outdoors already but Jensen saw that his favorite spot by the old Oak tree was blissfully unoccupied. He slumped down on the ground and leaned back against the rough bark.
Jensen let his head fall back and closed his eyes. He could feel the vibrations from the heavy bass through the ground beneath him. He hoped the cops didn't get called. If they did, he planned to be long gone. This was Mike's party. Jensen wanted nothing to do with it.
"You mind if I join you?"
Jensen opened his eyes and found himself staring at a familiar brunette. He took a drink and motioned to the ground next to him.
The girl took a seat and sighed. "It's a little overwhelming in there right now. Hope I'm not bothering you but this seems to be the only quiet place around here."
"It's fine," Jensen replied with a shrug, taking another drink, his eyes never leaving her face.
The girl blushed. "I'm Sandy, by the way," she said, holding out her hand.
"Jensen," he replied, taking her small hand in his. "So Sandy, what brings you out here?"
"To the party?" Sand asked. At Jensen's nod, she continued, "It's Saturday night, where else would I be?"
Jensen shrugged again, not really having an answer for her.
"Actually, I was planning to meet a friend here but I haven't seen him yet. And he's pretty hard to miss."
Jensen smirked. "Tall guy? Shaggy brown hair?" Big laugh?"
Sandy smiled and looked around. "That would be him. Is he here? Have you seen him?"
"Haven't seen him tonight," Jensen admitted, frowning slightly. He had almost forgotten that Mike had said Jared would be at the party and the butterflies in his stomach struck once again at the reminder. "I just saw you with him yesterday in the cafeteria."
Sandy was quiet for a minute before groaning. "Oh god, you saw him carry me in, didn't you?" Jensen chuckled as a look of pure horror crossed her face. "You did, didn't you?"
Jensen popped the top off a bottle of beer and handed it to her. "That was some entrance you two made."
Sandy flushed and took a long drink. "I'm going to kill him," she muttered. "So what brings you out here?"
Jensen smirked around his bottle at the obvious change in subject. "Me? I live here."
"So you live with Mike? Are you the boyfriend I've heard so much about?" Sandy questioned.
Jensen choked on his beer. "Me and Mike? Are you crazy?" Jensen could feel his face heat up. "No. I don't really swing that way. Why would you think we were together?"
Sandy's eyebrows drew together and her cheeks grew pink. "I'm sorry. Jared is always talking about Mike's boyfriend. Said it was really serious so I just thought-"
"That would be Tom," Jensen replied, cutting her off. "Serious in all the ways except living together."
Sandy laughed. "Tom?" When Jensen nodded, she brought a hand up to cover her mouth. "Oops!"
Jensen shook his head, slightly amused by her assumption.
"So you're straight?" Sandy asked, fingers tearing at the label on her bottle.
"Last I checked," Jensen answered. He wondered for a moment why she seemed so shocked.
"Well, that sucks," Sandy mumbled before taking another drink.
"Come again?" Jensen figured he couldn't have heard her right. The entire conversation was bordering on bizarre. He tossed his empty bottle aside and reached for another one.
"Oh nothing," Sandy replied, her voice quiet. She shifted uncomfortably. "Well, it was nice meeting you, Jensen, but I should probably go check on Jared. He should've been here by now and it's not like him to just not show up."
Jensen nodded as she stood up. He watched as she chewed on her lower lip, obviously wanting to say something more. She just gave a little shrug of her shoulders and headed toward the house with a wave of her hand.
Jensen watched her go and thought about their odd meeting. His chest tightened as he recalled that earlier afternoon at the Kane concert. He had been watching Jared again but this time Sandy had caught him staring.
"Oh god," Jensen moaned. That had to be the reason why she seemed so surprised that he wasn't gay. She had caught him watching her boyfriend and assumed-
Jensen reached for his beer and tilted his head back, letting the cold brew wash his brief moment of panic away. One thing was for sure. He wasn't drunk enough yet.
By the time the party had died down to a dull roar, Jensen had a decent buzz and was feeling pretty good. Until Mike showed up, that is. Jensen was sprawled out on the ground, staring up at the sky through glassy eyes when Mike's bald head popped into his line of sight, disrupting his view.
"Jenny!"
"Don't call me Jenny, fucker," Jensen glared at his friend before snorting back a laugh. He would have smacked him but then he would have to move.
"-get her number at least?" Mike's voice cut through the cottony haze of Jensen's mind.
"What number?" Jensen stared at Mike, utterly confused.
"The hot chick you were out here with," Mike explained, flopping down on the ground next to him. "Did you get her number?"
Jensen stared at the sky as his mind rolled. The only girl he'd really talked to was Sandy. "Jared's girlfriend? No."
Jensen could feel Mike's eyes on him as he turned his head to the side. "Jared's girlfriend?" Mike repeated, turning back to the sky. "As in Padalecki?"
"Do you know another Jared?" Jensen grumbled, his good mood vanishing into the shadows as he thought about laughing hazel eyes and dimples too deep to be real. He didn't want to think about Jared at all. He had managed to forget the kid for awhile but life seemed determined to keep bringing him up.
"Dude, Jared doesn't have a girlfriend," Mike laughed. "Unless he's married to the music. Which, knowing Jared, he just might be."
Jensen glared at his friend and ignored him.
"Bastard was supposed to be here," Mike said after a few minutes of silence. He tilted his head again to look at Jensen, a frown on his face. His eyes narrowed a bit as he stared at his roommate. "Why are you so hung up on Padalecki, man?"
"I'm not," Jensen covered his eyes with his arm. "Just said I was talking to his girl."
"And I said he doesn't have a girl," Mike stated, odd emphasis on the word 'girl.' "I want to know why you went from happy drunk to jealous bitch when his name was mentioned."
"I didn't," Jensen argued. He tried to play back their conversation but his mind was fuzzy with the details. "Whatever," he growled, dragging his body up to a seated position.
"Jen, I know you, man. You haven't sounded this irritated for no apparent reason since Kim and-" Mike sat up next to Jensen and started laughing. "Why Jenny, do you have a crush on Jared Padalecki?"
"Maybe," Jensen muttered. He immediately cursed his alcohol-loosened tongue. He pulled his legs up and let his head drop to his knees, hoping to hide his face, hoping to keep some of his secrets to himself.
Mike swallowed his laugh and sat in silence, his head surveying the ground around them. "You should let me introduce you to him," he finally said, voice calm and even.
Jensen turned his head away from his roommate and picked at a blade of grass. He didn't trust his voice so he shook his head. The entire day had been one humiliating event after another whenever Jared was involved. His name alone made Jensen's stomach twist. "I can't talk to him," Jensen finally said in a rough whisper, hoping his friend wouldn't hear.
No such luck. "Of course you can," Mike encouraged. "You just need the right situation."
Jensen sat up and stared at Mike. "Yeah right," he scoffed.
"I'm serious," Mike held up his hands. He scratched at his chin. "You tutoring on Monday night?"
Jensen shrugged, the alcohol in his system making him feel sluggish. "Supposed to."
"Good," Mike replied with a grin. "Give me a call at the station on your way home. I have an idea. Just need to work out the details."
Jensen stared hard at his roommate. There was an evil twinkle in Mike's eyes and from past experience, Jensen knew he was in trouble. He also knew there was no escaping Mike when he got into planning mode.
"Fine," he sighed, shaking his head at Mike's delighted whoop.
This couldn't be good.
xxxxxx
"How did I let you talk me into this again?" Jared leaned back in his chair and stretched his arms, mindful of the boom mike hanging above him.
Mike looked up from the computer and smirked. "Because you promised to come to my party, decided not to show, didn't call, and made me worry?"
"I fell asleep!" Jared argued. He had gone home on Saturday planning to take a nap. The next thing he remembered was Sandy pounding on his door Sunday morning. He didn't even remember turning his phone off.
"Sure," Mike dismissed his statement with a wave of his hand. "Whatever, man. You owe me."
Jared leaned forward and dropped his head on the desk. Mike had shown up for his shift half an hour ago and immediately laid on the guilt. Jared hadn't stood a chance. He looked up at his co-worker through his bangs, silently pleading for mercy.
Mike chuckled and shook his head. "This will be fun," he promised Jared before pushing a button and pulling the mike closer to his face. "It's 9:30 on Monday night and you all know what that means. It's time for this week's 'Lust Connection' and I have a special treat for those of you listening."
Jared groaned and pulled on his headphones, glaring at Mike as he waited for his cue.
"This week we have our very own celebrity guest, one of campus's most eligible bachelors, my fellow jockey Jared Padalecki."
Mike nodded at Jared and flipped the switch, turning on the second mike. Jared rolled his eyes, "Hey y'all. Go easy on me, ok. If you don't, we'll be looking for yet another DJ after Mike's untimely demise."
'The Lust Connection' was Mike's answer to the cheesy 80's dating show, 'The Love Connection.' Each Monday started things off with one student acting as the bachelor (or bachelorette) and three callers were chosen as that week's suitors. They would be given three questions and three minutes. Based on their answers, the listeners were encouraged to call in and vote for which suitor the bachelor should choose. The winning suitor got to choose where the date would take place. The dates rarely ended up as anything more than one night stands but the student body loved 'The Lust Connection.' Mike had been after Jared to participate for months but he had never given in. Until now.
"We'll be taking the first three callers, so if you want the once-in-a-lifetime chance to worship at the Padalecki altar up close and personal, give us a call. Lines will open up right after this commercial break."
Jared smacked Mike's arm, his mouth twisting in a rare frown. "The Padalecki altar? You're such a dick."
Mike shrugged and hummed to himself. "I just call it like I see it. And everyone wants a piece of you." Jared shook his head but Mike just pointed at the switchboard, lights lit up across the board. "See."
The commercial break was nearly over so Mike picked up the first line. He asked the person to hold and moved to the second. Jared gave Mike a strange look as he hung up on caller three and four. He then picked up the fifth and smiled. "Hey! Can you wait just a second?" he asked the person on the line. "Dude, it'll just be a minute. Relax!"
"And we're back with this week's bachelor, Jared. Now let's find out who might get lucky enough to score with Jay," Mike reached over and punched the button for line one. "Caller number one, who might you be?"
"This is Erica," the familiar feminine voice said. "Jared, I thought you were going to meet me at the concert. But don't worry, you can make it up to me this Saturday."
Mike stifled his laughter behind a closed fist as Jared rolled his eyes and dropped his head onto his arms. "Alright Erica, just hold on the line while we find out who our other contestants are. Caller number two, state your name, rank, and measurements."
"Um, ok," the girl started. "My name is Allison. I'm a junior. And, um-"
Jared jumped up and reached over the board, punching the button to activate his mike. "Allison, ignore Mike," he interrupted her. "Nice to meet you." He shot a glare at his friend as he sat back down.
Mike chuckled and punched line three. "This is Mike."
"Hey Mike," the guy on the line said. "You said to-"
"Jenny! Is that you?" Mike shouted. Jared narrowed his eyes. Mike was up to something.
"Yeah, of course it is. You said-" the guy continued.
"Well, you lucked out, man, because you're caller number three," Mike interrupted.
A heavy sigh sounded across the line. "It's Monday, isn't it?"
Jared shook his head. Sounded like he wasn't the only one conned into being a part of this week's edition of 'Lust Connection.' His mind raced and the name clicked. "Jenny? You're Mike's roommate?"
"It's Jensen, actually," the guy replied. "And sadly yes."
"Oh man, I'm so sorry," Jared said with a laugh. "I just have to work with the guy. And I always thought you were a girl."
"He always calls me Jenny, doesn't he?" Jensen asked. There was a pause. "And are we on the air?"
"Yes on both counts," Jared answered.
Mike jumped in before Jensen could curse his name to hell and back. "You're caller number three, man. And we here pride ourselves on being equal opportunists so you have a shot at a date Saturday with my man Jared."
"I do, do I?" Jared laughed at the obvious sarcasm. "Better than a date with you, man."
"You should be so lucky," Mike said interrupting him. "You all know how this works. I'll ask three questions and you have one minute to answer. After each one of you has answered the question, Jared will give you his answers. Three questions, three minutes. That's all the time you have to convince the listeners to vote for you. Just answer honestly. No one likes a cheat." Jared pretended to fall asleep as Mike rattled through the rules. Mike swatted at him and asked the first question. "Erica, what is your idea of the perfect date?"
"The perfect date for me would be a huge concert at one of the coolest venues," Erica replied. "Loud music, lots of people, and just spending time with that special someone. Then we could dance all night at one of the clubs downtown. Our ears would be ringing for hours."
Jared cringed. Concerts were always a good time, but he really wasn't into the club scene. Mike looked like he was trying not to laugh. Jared just knew he was remembering the last time Jared had 'danced' in public. There had been a lot of alcohol involved. A lot of alcohol. Jared glared at Mike. His coworker coughed into his fist. "Ok Allison, how about you?"
"I like to eat out so my best date would start at a restaurant, preferably one with a decent salad bar," Allison's voice was quiet and breathy. Jared was tempted to ask her to speak up but remained silent as she continued. "After dinner we'd go see whatever was playing at the theater. I love plays, especially musicals."
Jared shrugged a shoulder when Mike glanced his way. Still not really his idea of a good time, but he wasn't completely opposed to the idea. "And Jensen?"
Jensen's voice was a low rumble. "I've never really been one to do anything fancy," Jensen admitted. "My idea of a good time is catching a show at one of the bars downtown. We have a decent music scene that no one seems to know about. Live music, cold beer, and a good friend is all I need."
Jared smiled. He liked this guy. "Guess it's my turn," he said before Mike could prompt him. "I'm a dinner and movie kind of guy. As long as dinner is some hole-in-the-wall diner with great food and the movie is a rental watched at home. I also like parties and hanging with my friends. I just want the person I'm with to be comfortable enough with me to relax. Life has enough stress."
"And now for question two," Mike broke in when Jared had finished. "If you were given $50 to spend on anything right now, what would you buy?"
Jared mind wandered a bit as Erica ran through a million possibilities, all things she just couldn't live without. Finally she settled on shoes. Allison started blabbering on and on about this painting she desperately wanted for her living room. Jared shook his head and dropped forward, resting his forehead on the desk. If he was forced to spend an evening with one of these girls, he had no idea what they'd talk about.
"-and a couple boxes of guitar strings, since my roommate always seems to be losing mine."
"Now Jenny-"
"You play guitar?" Jared asked, focused on the show once more.
"Yeah, I've been playing since I was a teenager," Jensen admitted.
"You any good?"
"I'm not bad, I guess." Jared smiled. He didn't even know this guy but he guessed he was shrugging. "How about you? What would you do with $50?"
"Hmmmm," Jared pretended to think about his answer. "That's easy. There's this music fest coming up this summer down in Dakota that-"
"Man, that is going to be one hell of a weekend," Jensen interrupted. "Did you see the lineup? I know a couple of the bands that are playing and they're incredible. My buddy Chris will be there so I'm trying to go, show my support."
"Yeah, I heard they got Kyle Young to play this year," Jared couldn't keep the excitement out of his voice. "That guy's awesome and I've been wanting to check out his live show forever. You know, maybe we-"
Mike cleared his throat and shot Jared a pointed stare. Jared mumbled an apology and Mike smirked. "Last question: Favorite music?"
"Ooh, that's tough," Erica complained. "I'd have to say right now it's Fall Out Boy. The lead singer is hot and their music is just so much fun. I like pretty much anything with a beat. Something I can dance to."
Of course, Jared mouthed to Mike. Allison hummed to herself as she thought about her answer, finally settling on Top 40. "But I listen to a lot of classical music when I'm studying," she rushed on. Jared shrugged at Mike again. He wasn't really surprised by the responses.
"Ok, Jenny, your turn," Mike prompted his roommate.
"Stop calling me Jenny," Jensen muttered before answering the question. "I have to go with singer/songwriters. I respect them a lot because they put so much of themselves into their music."
"And Jared?" Mike smirked.
Jared glared at his friend. "I hate you, Mike. Obviously I listen to a little bit of everything. I can never narrow down a favorite because that changes at any given time. But I avoid a lot of the popular stuff because it's often overplayed. I just love music that has something to say, something that makes you feel, that gets to you."
Mike punched a button, cutting off lines. "There you have it, dear listeners. Who should Jared choose? Who cares? You have the power to say who he should date. So let's have it. Call those votes in and tune in tomorrow to find out who the winner is. We'll be back after this commercial break."
As Mike took down the necessary information about the contestants, Jared checked to make sure the answering system was working properly before reaching over and picking up the third line. "Jensen?"
"Yeah?" Jensen sounded a bit startled to hear Jared again.
"So what's this asshole got on you?" Jared asked, voice teasing.
Jensen chuckled. "Nothing, really. Just told me to call. I should've remembered it was Monday."
Jared tucked the phone between his shoulder and ear and spun around in his chair. "You know," he finally said, "I think he was a snake in a former life." Jared laughed as Mike flipped him off, still focused on his work.
Jensen laughed and the sound sent a spark down Jared's spine. Jensen had a nice laugh, open and free. "How'd you get to be the lucky bachelor?"
Jared groaned. "Slept through his party."
"That's why you weren't there?"
"Yeah," Jared replied. "You were there?"
"I kinda live there, Jared," Jensen gently reminded.
"Oh yeah, forgot that for a moment," Jared said. "How is it we've never met before? We've never met before, have we?"
"Nah, we've never met."
Jared yawned, his exhaustion taking its toll once again. "Well, we should definitely meet. Anyway, I'm about to fall asleep here so I should go. Need to make it back to the dorms in one piece, preferably semi-conscious."
"Yeah, sounds like a good idea," Jensen said, his voice a bit quieter.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow, though," Jared pointed out. He definitely wanted to get to know the guy better. They had mutual friends and it seemed like they had some things in common. "We need to plan our revenge on Mike."
Jensen snorted. "He's going down."
"Fuck yeah, he is," Jared agreed. He yawned again and grasped the phone to keep it from falling. "Night, Jensen."
"Night, Jared."
xxxxxx
"Your boyfriend is a dead man."
Tom laughed at Jensen's empty threat. "I caught the show last night. And from the sound of it, I really don't think you mean that."
Jensen groaned. He hadn't really expected to receive support from Tom but he had hoped. He should have known Mike was up to something. He'd been too nice, too quiet, since Jensen made that drunken confession Saturday night. But Jensen hadn't paid attention and wound up getting blindsided. He thought back over the too-short conversation last night with Jared and his heart thumped a little harder.
"Jen?" Tom's voice broke into his thoughts, snapping him back to the present.
"Yeah," he replied. "Sorry, what was that?"
"You do like Jared, don't you?" Tom asked. "I mean, the other day it seemed-"
"Maybe," Jensen admitted. "I'm not sure. How did you know you were-"
He was interrupted by the call waiting. "Hang on, Tom." He clicked over. "Hello?"
"Jensen?"
Jensen's breath caught. He knew that voice. "Jared?"
Jared chuckled. "Yeah. Hope you don't mind me calling. I was just gettin' bored sitting around here and I said I'd call. But if you're busy-"
"No," Jensen jumped in, kicking himself for sounding too eager. He had to admit he was surprised. When Jared had said he'd call, he had figured that was just his way of saying good-bye. "Just a second. I'll be right back." Jensen switched back. "Hey Tom, I gotta go. I'll talk to you later."
"Tell Jared hi for me," Tom said with a laugh.
"How did you-" he started but Tom was gone. He sighed and pressed the pound button. "Ok, I'm back."
Jensen frowned as he was met with silence. He hoped Jared hadn't thought he was...god, could he sound more like a girl? After waiting for a minute with no response, Jensen was getting ready to hang up the phone but stopped when he heard Jared's voice pouring through the stereo speakers. He introduced the next song set and the music started up.
"Jensen?"
Jensen smiled, ridiculously pleased just hearing Jared say his name. "Yeah, I'm here."
"Sorry 'bout that," Jared apologized. "I didn't realize how close I was to the commercial break."
"That's ok," Jensen replied. There was a moment of quiet as his mind raced for something to say. Jensen wasn't a big fan of phones. They always made him a bit uncomfortable.
"I have to tell you something," Jared said, voice low, as if telling him a secret. "I don't really like talking on the phone. I mean, I like to talk but the phone is just so impersonal. It's hard to tell what someone is thinking when you can't see them."
"Man, I'm the same way," Jensen let out a deep breath. He felt oddly relieved that Jared wasn't completely comfortable either. "And talking to Mike on the phone never works. I need the instant gratification of being able to slap him upside the head when he says something stupid."
Jared laughed, the sound warm and comforting. "Yeah, well I tend to overcompensate by talking way too much. Feel free to tell me to shut up at any time."
Jensen smiled as Jared launched into a discussion about his little sister and how they both always had to have the last word and the only way their mother could get them to stop arguing was to pull out the duct tape. Or something like that. Jensen got a bit lost, paying more attention to the fast cadence of his words than the words themselves. Jared hadn't been lying when he said he talked a lot, but Jensen didn't really mind. It wasn't long before Jared had drawn him into the conversation and they were discussing everything from their childhood ambitions to life as the middle child to their favorite places to eat in town.
"Oh wow," Jared stopped mid-sentence. "I'll be right back."
Jensen stood up and stretched before heading into the kitchen for something to drink. He glanced at the clock on the wall and was shocked to see that he had been on the phone with Jared for nearly an hour. Conversation had been flowing smooth and easy, the only interruptions were those for Jared to deal with studio business. Jensen just felt comfortable talking to Jared and found himself opening up more than he usually would to someone he had technically just met. They were already talking like old friends.
The stereo was on but turned down low, the sound muffled as Jensen reached into the fridge for a beer. He closed the door and headed back into the living room, smiling at the low rumble of Jared's voice as he came out of a commercial break and set up the next song set.
"So y'all know about Mike's game 'The Lust Connection' and how he finally convinced me to participate. Well, tonight at nine we find out the results of who you all picked for me. But I decided to take advantage of my position here to let you all know who I'd choose, if given the chance. So Jensen, the next set of songs is for you. It has your name all over it."
Jensen sat back down in his chair with a heavy thump as the music began to play. Jared had just announced to everyone listening that he'd choose him if he could. Jensen wasn't quite sure how to handle that. He tucked the phone under his ear and waited for Jared to get back on the line.
"Still there?"
"Yeah," Jensen mumbled.
"So," Jared paused, suddenly sounding more nervous than Jensen had ever heard him before. "What do you think about my little tribute?"
Jensen listened closer to the music that was playing in the background. Recognizing the song, he groaned. "Jenny? Seriously?"
Jared laughed and any uneasiness that might have existed quickly disappeared. "Hey man, there isn't exactly a lot out there with your name. I had to improvise."
"Just don't make it a habit," Jensen warned. He paused just a moment and before he could stop himself, he blurted out the question he wanted answered the most.
"Why me?"
"Oh," Jared was quiet for a moment before continuing. "Why not? You sound like someone I'd get along with, we have a lot of the same friends, and you'd beat a girl any day."
Jensen felt his face heat up. "Why's that?"
"Well...I'm gay," Jared admitted. "It's not really a secret or anything, I just don't advertise it that much."
"Oh," Jensen replied. He deflated a bit, wondering if Jared had chosen him simply because he was a guy.
Jared seemed to sense the shift of Jensen's thoughts. "Jensen, I'd have chosen you anyway," he rushed to assure him. "This may sound weird or incredibly girly or whatever, but I feel like I've known you forever. There's just this-"
"Connection?" Jensen finished for him as he took a swig from his beer bottle.
"Yeah," Jared exhaled. "That's weird, right?"
Jensen thought about the past 24 hours, the smooth flow of conversation and his easy acceptance of everything that had been thrown his way. Normally, Jensen would sit back and try to analyze all the various angles of a situation before making a move. But this time, he was simply going with the flow. "Nah," he finally said.
"Good," Jared huffed out a relieved sigh.
Jensen felt it was time for a subject change. "So Mike was saying that you guys had a few interviews set up today for the open DJ slot. Did you find anyone?"
"We did, actually," Jared replied. "Thank god. I'm really getting tired of all the doubles. I'll work with the new guy the next three days and hopefully he'll be ready to go on his own on Monday."
Jensen listened as Jared rambled on about the new guy, Justin. He was a senior majoring in engineering who just happened to have radio experience, was a baseball player, and had a mutt that he rescued from the pound.
And likes long walks on the beach. Jensen added, silently to himself. Every time he began to feel the slightest bit jealous as Jared went on and on about the new guy, he'd hear one song end and the next 'Jenny' song begin to play. Smiling was inevitable.
"Hey, I'll be back in just a second," Jared muttered.
Jensen could hear a low murmur through the phone. "Nice tribute." Jensen immediately recognized his roommate's voice.
"Yeah, well, you know me," Jared's slow drawl was muffled. Jensen pictured Jared's long fingers wrapped around the mouthpiece, pressing lightly against the plastic.
Mike sounded amused. "So, you have a thing for my roommate? Because I'd like to know just what your intentions are."
Jensen strained to hear Jared's response but it was distorted and faint. He'd just have to ask Mike later. Jensen shuddered when he realized how much he sounded like Mackenzie and her girlfriends. Give him another week and he'd be passing notes to Jared through his friends. Do you like me? Check yes or no.
"Sit down, shut up, and call those girls," Jared's voice was suddenly loud and clear.
Jensen could hear Mike muttering in the background as he did what he was told. "Let me guess, you're going to call Jensen?"
"Something like that," Jared replied. There was a moment of silence and Jensen almost laughed. He could hear the moment that Mike realized the truth.
"You're already talking to him!" Mike hollered, his voice a laughing accusation.
"So what?" Jared argued. "Swing that mike over here, will you? Still there?"
Jensen realized that Jared was talking to him again. "Still here. If Mike says anything else remind him that I know where he sleeps."
Jared laughed. "I'll do that. So, you ready to get this whole game over with?"
"Is that all I am to you?" Jensen huffed. "A game?"
"I didn't mean it like that," Jared rushed.
"Relax, I'm kidding," Jensen laughed. Jared's mumbled 'told you I hate the phone' only made him laugh harder.
"Your radio turned down?" Jared asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"Less feedback," he responded before segueing into the close of his show. There was an odd sense of surround sound as Jensen heard Jared loud and clear in his ear, his voice echoing quieter in the background. "And now I'm handing this over to Mike while I sit here and await my fate."
"Just for that, I should hold the results until later," Mike joked. "But I'm a nice guy so I won't do that to you."
Jensen and Jared both snorted at that. "He wouldn't know nice if it bit him in the ass," Jensen said.
"Yeah, thanks Jenny," Mike replied.
Jensen's eyes widened. "Jared, you could have told me I was on the air."
"Sorry?"
"You'll just have to make it up to me later," Jensen grumbled, shaking his head in embarrassment.
"What do you say we get this show on the road?" Mike interrupted and Jensen could hear the smirk in his voice. Before anyone could say anything, he continued. "Erica, Allison, you both there?"
Both girls answered in the affirmative and Jared greeted them warmly. "Ok Mike, let's get on with this."
"Patience, patience," Mike muttered. He cleared his throat. "First, I'd just like to say that last night we had more votes than ever before. My man Jared here may just go down in history on this show. Now, for the results...with 86 percent of the votes, the winner is....Jensen."
"That's not fair!" Erica cried as the result was announced.
"Excuse me?" Mike sounded shocked. "How is it not fair?"
"You rigged the results! The guy's your roommate! Of course he won."
Jensen could almost hear Mike grinding his teeth at the mere suggestion that he'd do anything to lessen his show's integrity. "I'm sorry, but there is no questioning the results. I don't have anything to do with tallying the votes. We have two volunteers who work at the studio who deal with all the phone lines. If you have problems with the votes, I suggest you take it up with them."
"Fine! I will!" Erica said before hanging up.
"Ok then," Jared huffed a small laugh. "I'd just like to thank the listeners for sparing me the drama."
"I have to say I'm not sad it isn't me, but I hope you have a good time with Jensen, Jared," Allison made her peace and hung up on a positive note.
"Well that was fun," Jensen muttered. He was still a bit shocked that so many people had called in and voted for him.
"So Jensen, any ideas what you two will do on Saturday?" Mike asked, obviously trying not to laugh. Jensen planned all the ways he would hurt his roommate later.
"Um...I'll have to get back to you on that," Jensen said. His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. He was going to actually spend time with Jared, one-on-one. He definitely needed to think about it before making plans.
"We done here?" Jared asked and Jensen almost answered before he realized that Jared was talking to Mike.
"That's it," Mike agreed.
"In that case, I'd like to say goodnight for now," Jared said. "And be sure to tune in tomorrow at 3 for your first chance to hear our newest DJ, Justin. Until tomorrow, I'm out of here."
Jensen waited for a moment until Jared spoke again. "Jen? We're off the air, now."
"Thank god," Jensen muttered.
"So it looks like it's you and me on Saturday," Jared pointed out. "And just so you know, I expect dinner first if you expect me to put out."
Jensen sputtered, "Man, I don't-"
Jared's laughter interrupted him. "Jen, it's cool. I was kidding." Jensen took a deep breath, trying to slow his heart rate. "You just figure out what you want to do and I'm up for whatever. But now I should probably go. I have to get some homework done before I pass out."
"Yeah?" Jensen hoped he didn't sound too sad about ending their conversation. He'd had a good night just talking. It had been awhile since he'd felt that kind of connection to anyone. "Ok."
"I'll be working with Justin until 7," Jared told him. "Call me here around 7:30?"
Jensen smiled. "Sure, I can do that."
"Great! Talk to you then!"
Jensen hung up the phone and tossed it onto the coffee table. He caught sight of his reflection in the glass, a goofy smile plastered across his face.
Tomorrow couldn't come soon enough.
xxxxxx
The knock at the door was a bit unexpected. Jared was tempted to just ignore it and go back to sleep but he groaned and rolled himself out of bed. He could always sleep when he was dead.
The heavy wood door swung open to reveal Sophia, her eyes rimmed with red and her hair a mess. It didn't take a scientist to know that that something was wrong. Sophia never left the sorority house looking anything less than her absolute best.
"Hey," Jared said, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the room. He wrapped his arms around her tiny frame and held her close. She buried her face into his shirt and took a breath, her shoulders hitching with a contained sob.
Sophia pulled back and dabbed at her eyes. "Sorry," she sniffled. "I know you don't have class on Friday afternoon and you were probably sleeping. But I ...I just really needed someone to talk to."
Jared released an internal sigh. He really had been looking forward to that nap. But some things were simply more important. He jumped up onto the bed and leaned back against the wall. A pat on the mattress next to him was all it took for Sophia to climb up next to him.
Jared wrapped his arm around the pretty brunette and tucked her head under his chin. "So what did he do?"
"What did who do?" Sophia tried to sound confused but Jared wasn't buying it.
"Soph," he coaxed, his voice low and soothing, "Just tell me. I promise you'll feel better if you do."
Sophia played with the frayed ends of Jared's shirt, twirling a loose thread around her finger. "I saw him with her. He told me he was sorry and that he'd never do it again. But when I said no, he was back with her like I never even mattered."
Jared swallowed down the instant anger he felt towards his best friend. "I'm sorry," he told her. "Chad's an asshole."
"You're just saying that because you're my friend," Sophia replied, staring at the wall opposite the bed.
Jared followed her gaze to the big breasted model with the vacant 'I'm supposed to be sexy' smile staring back at them from a poster and frowned. "No, I'm saying that because it's the truth. Chad's my best friend and I love him like a brother, but he fucked up," Jared pulled his head back far enough to look down at her. "You deserve better."
Sophia curled her body into Jared's and drew her knee up to rest on his leg. Jared rubbed circles into the small of her back, hoping to give her a small amount of comfort.
Two weeks ago, life had been perfect for the campus golden couple. Even after two years together, they still acted like newlyweds on their honeymoon. They were sickeningly sweet, but it was nice. Then Chad ruined it all by getting drunk and sleeping with another friend's little sister. Sophia had literally caught him with his pants down. Jared wasn't about to cut him any slack. Chad had something special with Sophia. She loved him despite all his faults but it didn't seem to be enough.
"Do you think I should have forgiven him?" Sophia asked, her voice soft and low as if afraid of his answer.
"No, I really don't," Jared told her. He sat back and watched shadows dance across the walls as tree limbs outside the window swayed in the breeze. "I think Chad was extremely lucky to have you for as long as he did. He doesn't really know how to handle good things in his life, never has. It's like he has to go out of his way to screw them up. It's no excuse, just how he is. But he had something rare and special and still managed to fuck it up. He hurt you and I can't agree with him there. It puts me in an extremely awkward position because I know he feels bad, but I know how I'd feel, so-"
Sophia looked up at Jared with a watery smile. "Why do all the good guys have to be gay?"
Jared stared down at her. "Been talking to Sandy?" She nodded and Jared grinned. "Just lucky, I guess." He sighed. "Soph, any guy would be lucky to have you. Try not to forget that."
Sophia sniffled and resumed her intense examination of the hem of Jared's shirt. "Sorry I added you to the Bachelor list," she said. "I know you get embarrassed by the attention. But I just wanted to make everyone aware of how special you are. Any guy would be lucky to have you, too, you know."
Jared shrugged. "It's not so bad, actually. I don't know how you managed to convince everyone that you weren't completely crazy, but some good things have come out of that poll."
Sophia tilted her head up to stare at him, her brown eyes wide. She tried to hide her satisfied smile. "You're talking about Mike's show, aren't you? That Jensen guy?"
Jared ducked his head, blushing at the mention of Jensen's name. "Maybe," he admitted. He tried to make that one word sound completely casual but he knew he had failed miserably. Sophia elbowed him in the ribs, silently urging him to continue.
"I really like him, Soph," he finally said. "I haven't even met him in person yet but there's definitely something there." Jared went on to tell her how they'd talked every day since the show on Monday, discussing anything and everything that came to mind. His face heated up with every admission but he couldn't stop the words from flowing.
"Awwww, aren't you adorable," Sophia offered a small smile, obviously trying to avoid making him feel more embarrassed than he already did. Her eyes narrowed a bit as she watched him. "Why do I get the feeling that there is a 'but' in there somewhere?"
Jared bit his lip. "Jensen is great and I really do like him," he repeated. "But...there's this other guy I can't stop thinking about."
Sophia raised an eyebrow. "Another guy? You been holding out on me? Who is this mystery man?"
"That's just it, he's a mystery."
Jared explained about the gorgeous guy at the Kane concert. He told Sophia how he had been trying to find out who the guy was since that day. Jared had watched the same 30 second clip time and time again while editing footage for his video. He saw the strong profile and short light brown hair every time he slept. He kept looking, but so far he'd had no luck. He'd tried asking Tom but he'd been rather evasive.
Sophia frowned and shook her head. "Jared, I love you, but you've got to make a decision here."
"I know, he replied, miserable at the idea of choosing. "I really don't know what to do."
"Are you kidding me?" Sophia smacked his arm and pulled away. She sat up and stared at him. "God, boys are so stupid sometimes."
"What?" Jared couldn't stop the low growl that escaped. He just didn't get girls.
"So there are these two guys. One of them is pretty much perfect for you. He's intelligent, interesting, and there is definitely a connection even though you've never seen him."
Jared nodded when Sophia gave him a pointed look, obviously expecting some sort of response.
"And then there is another guy who you really don't know anything about except he's very, very pretty," Sophia added, emphasis on 'pretty' combined with a raised brow. "Jared, you don't even know if he goes to school here or if he was just here for the concert!"
"Well, when you put it that way," Jared could feel his face heating up yet again. She had a point. Jensen was incredible and the other guy...well, he could be a complete asshole for all Jared knew.
Sophia huffed and threw up her hands. "Like I said. Stupid."
Jared scratched the back of his neck. "I'm being ridiculous, aren't I?"
Sophia shrugged and curled back up against him. "That's what you have me for. Honestly, I think you're just scared because things are already going so well with Jensen. He really seems to get you and it scares you. Just stop being an idiot and go with it."
Jared reached for the remote to his stereo and turned up the music, Maroon 5 filling the room. Sophia burrowed down into the blankets on the bed, snuggling closer to Jared. She rested her head on his shoulder, her palm warm against his stomach. "I'm keeping you, aren't I? You probably want to go back to sleep or something."
"Nah," Jared tightened his arm around her shoulders and closed his eyes. "Right now I'm exactly where I need to be."
Part Three