nothing better to do...
1. What did you do in 2003 that you'd never done before?
lots of things, all the good ones fell apart just in time for new years, so yeah.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i didn't make any, nor will i make any this year, why set myself up for the inevitable fall
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
not particularly, just patty
4. Did anyone close to you die?
yeah, me. i am dead, at least more dead than alive.
5. What countries did you visit?
none. i never get to go anywhere.
6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?
hmm well, i thought i had it all for a while, now i have nothing, something would be nice, but i dont want to expect anything anymore, it only hurts.
7. What date from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
my first date with lauren, the awkward kiss under the tree on the green
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
finding faith in myself and my life
9. What was your biggest failure?
losing lauren and losing who i am along the way.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
my heart is shattered, other than that no.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
hmm probably something i got for her.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
um...well, im still alive, thats something that merits celebration i guess, to some maybe.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
scott. definitely scott.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Lauren, food, pot.
15. What did you get really excited about?
being with lauren
16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
the song from the wedding singer, yellowcard cigarette, brand new seventy times seven, blessed union of souls standing at the edge of the earth
17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?
much less happy. i was happier than i had ever been, now i am stuck in a seemingly infinite depression. what the fuck is happy anyways, a phase more than anything else.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
getting my life together, not just focusing all my attention to one person destined to let me down.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
caring about people that didn't deserve it, anything to do with colleen
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
thank god its over. fuck christmas.
21. Did you fall in love in 2003?
yup, i fell so hard that when the support gave way the fall left me paralyzed, probably forever.
23. How many one-night stands?
none, one sorta i guess kinda, my greatest regret that i cant remember.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
family guy
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
absolutely.
26. What was the best book you read?
hmm...cant remember.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
count the stars, silverstein, fata
28. What did you want and get?
everything i lost
29. What did you want and not get?
everything i had that disappeared
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
hmm...i guess freddy vs. jason, it was fun and from a time when things were so much less complicated
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
don't remember, it was in january. this year on my birthday, i will probably sit alone and wonder...
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
not being heartbroken and backstabbed and lied to about it to end the year, that might have been nice.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
whatever the fuck i feel like, like always.
34. What kept you sane?
lauren, and now that shes gone so is my sanity
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
don't know
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
ugh just look at our retarded president
37. Who do you miss?
um...duh...yeah Lauren.
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Lauren.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003.
don't trust anyone, live for yourself. everyone else does, and all you get from being selfless is pain. when you hurt so bad you can't hurt anymore, just give up on everyone, wont it be much easier that way??
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
i try
to be the man i am
in times of broken lives
and shattered dreams and plans
standing up to fight
the pressures and demands
staring at the knife
and holding in your hand
what used to be your life
this world is crazy
my dreams are fading
i want my life
you fight
your fucked up holy wars
fire anti-christ
jesus will come down
and help us win tonight
now how should i feel
i think i feel alright
so tell me where to aim
i'm blinded by the light
this world is crazy
my dreams are fading
no one can save me
i want my life
and when i wake up you'll be here
and it will be the way it was
smile empty soul
lots of things, all the good ones fell apart just in time for new years, so yeah.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i didn't make any, nor will i make any this year, why set myself up for the inevitable fall
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
not particularly, just patty
4. Did anyone close to you die?
yeah, me. i am dead, at least more dead than alive.
5. What countries did you visit?
none. i never get to go anywhere.
6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?
hmm well, i thought i had it all for a while, now i have nothing, something would be nice, but i dont want to expect anything anymore, it only hurts.
7. What date from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
my first date with lauren, the awkward kiss under the tree on the green
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
finding faith in myself and my life
9. What was your biggest failure?
losing lauren and losing who i am along the way.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
my heart is shattered, other than that no.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
hmm probably something i got for her.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
um...well, im still alive, thats something that merits celebration i guess, to some maybe.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
scott. definitely scott.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Lauren, food, pot.
15. What did you get really excited about?
being with lauren
16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
the song from the wedding singer, yellowcard cigarette, brand new seventy times seven, blessed union of souls standing at the edge of the earth
17. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?
much less happy. i was happier than i had ever been, now i am stuck in a seemingly infinite depression. what the fuck is happy anyways, a phase more than anything else.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
getting my life together, not just focusing all my attention to one person destined to let me down.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
caring about people that didn't deserve it, anything to do with colleen
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
thank god its over. fuck christmas.
21. Did you fall in love in 2003?
yup, i fell so hard that when the support gave way the fall left me paralyzed, probably forever.
23. How many one-night stands?
none, one sorta i guess kinda, my greatest regret that i cant remember.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
family guy
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
absolutely.
26. What was the best book you read?
hmm...cant remember.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
count the stars, silverstein, fata
28. What did you want and get?
everything i lost
29. What did you want and not get?
everything i had that disappeared
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
hmm...i guess freddy vs. jason, it was fun and from a time when things were so much less complicated
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
don't remember, it was in january. this year on my birthday, i will probably sit alone and wonder...
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
not being heartbroken and backstabbed and lied to about it to end the year, that might have been nice.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
whatever the fuck i feel like, like always.
34. What kept you sane?
lauren, and now that shes gone so is my sanity
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
don't know
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
ugh just look at our retarded president
37. Who do you miss?
um...duh...yeah Lauren.
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Lauren.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003.
don't trust anyone, live for yourself. everyone else does, and all you get from being selfless is pain. when you hurt so bad you can't hurt anymore, just give up on everyone, wont it be much easier that way??
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
i try
to be the man i am
in times of broken lives
and shattered dreams and plans
standing up to fight
the pressures and demands
staring at the knife
and holding in your hand
what used to be your life
this world is crazy
my dreams are fading
i want my life
you fight
your fucked up holy wars
fire anti-christ
jesus will come down
and help us win tonight
now how should i feel
i think i feel alright
so tell me where to aim
i'm blinded by the light
this world is crazy
my dreams are fading
no one can save me
i want my life
and when i wake up you'll be here
and it will be the way it was
smile empty soul