don't expect much, you will love it.
Haha okay, so space_cadet's recent post about diary entries made me look through one of mine (the most recent one, so most of it is all from the past year and a half) and I realized I never posted all the funny shit that happened in Drivers Ed LAST YEAR. Haha I know, old news and all, but I got a laugh out of it. Then again, I was there, so idk how funny it will be for anyone else.
• We were talking about HOV lanes. Chris asked "What if the number was four, and you had three people and a dog? Would that count?"
"No."
"What if you had a lot of dogs?" "How many dogs would you need to equal one person?" "What if you had a really big dog? Like a mastiff? What if you had -"
(and someone interrupts with) "-a bear??"
• There was this girl Paige who went to the bathroom like, every five minutes. One day our teacher was waiting to start because Paige was the only one not there. This guy Chris goes "Is that the girl that went to the bathroom like, 11 times yesterday?" (turns out she was throwing up? anyway) and the teacher said yeah so he's like, "Well, she's probably in the bathroom! Have you checked??"
• Our teacher told us this one time she went driving and fell asleep on purpose, but it was okay, because she was in the desert and there was no one around. So of course all the smart ass guys had something to say. lol.
"Motorcycles! What about (if there were) Motorcycles? You just said they can come out of nowhere! You said it!"
"So, are you telling us we can do that? Fall asleep as long as we're in the desert?"
"Have you ever driven drunk in the desert, just to see what would happen? Have you ever done drugs?"
• At one point this guy Kenny went to the bathroom, and Chris was like "Put a chair up against the door so he can't get out!" and the teacher was quiet and this kid up front, Julian, was like "Dude, look, she's thinkin' about it!" haha cause she totally was. But she was like, "No, I couldn't do that.." but you could tell she wanted to, cause she didn't like Kenny.
• Paige & Kenny sort of got into it. He kept interrupting and she kept yelling @ him to STFU and eventually she was like, "What are you, 12??" Eventually he came back with, "Well, at least I'm responsible enough to not get pregnant!" I admit it, I lmao'd. She's a bitch.
• One of the guys (Vince or Chris) was like "You know what is always on 24/7?? LAW AND ORDER." LOL AMIRITE! Especially because that is literally all my mom watches. And they were talking about how whenever you stay home from school, you ALWAYS watch The Price is Right. x)
• Desert jokes continued for the duration of class. Everytime she said something, someone piped up with, "in the desert???"
• She told us that if you're over 18, it's illegal to be outside without ID. Chris laughed, "So am I going to need my ID when I check the mail or I could get arrested?" (And she said not on private property.) Julian added "What about when I'm walking my dog?" And they kept going. It's not so much the things she says, it's how she says them and makes them sound ridiculous.
• She had us do the beer goggles. None of the girls wanted to, but the boys wanted to keep them on and see if they could make it back to the classroom. (No.) Then someone asked if you could wear them while you're driving. She said no. He asked, "What if I was in the desert?" XD
• .40 - possible coma. She said "comma". I lol'd. It's like a living example of badfic. She probably writes it.
• Chris = How do you go to .50 (death) if you're in a coma? Do they have an IV of alcohol?
• Chris = I once had a friend who told me to drink bleach to get the alcohol out of my system. (And Teacher was like, WHAT? NO!) I know! I was like, I'm not going to kill myself dude. ("DO NOT DRINK BLEACH!" she tells us, like we're actually going to or something.)
• Teacher has actually done a Lot of Drugs. Not sure she is best candidate for driving instructor.
• "You can't drive and cry at the same time!" - Teacher (crywalkers?? lol)
• "You don't know who's out there with a gun!!" - Teacher re: road rage
• Tim flat out told her he would break check a guy for tailgating. She freaked out. He took it back.
• She told us she hydroplaned on purpose once. "Was it in the desert??" Every single person in the classroom asked, I shit you not.
• Last day, she's 45 minutes late. Most of us were waiting for more than an hour, because we all get there early. And she's always late, but this was crazy. We thought she got lost (you guessed it) in the desert. Turns out, she did get lost! Gavin called shenanigans: "You come here every day, I refuse to believe that!" She said she dropped off a student driver (she was driving the Yaris! But its a stick and IDontWantHerTeachingMeToDrive!) in Linthicum and got "turned around" trying to get back. Seriously, how does that happen? It's not very difficult.
• Some dude was standing around while we were waiting and got hit by a truck. Not really funny.
Also, I just made a freakishly long to-do list. Good thing it's 90% fun stuff :>
And I'm going to leave you with some FotC, cause it's stuck in my head.
COLD HEARTED BITCHHHH.
• We were talking about HOV lanes. Chris asked "What if the number was four, and you had three people and a dog? Would that count?"
"No."
"What if you had a lot of dogs?" "How many dogs would you need to equal one person?" "What if you had a really big dog? Like a mastiff? What if you had -"
(and someone interrupts with) "-a bear??"
• There was this girl Paige who went to the bathroom like, every five minutes. One day our teacher was waiting to start because Paige was the only one not there. This guy Chris goes "Is that the girl that went to the bathroom like, 11 times yesterday?" (turns out she was throwing up? anyway) and the teacher said yeah so he's like, "Well, she's probably in the bathroom! Have you checked??"
• Our teacher told us this one time she went driving and fell asleep on purpose, but it was okay, because she was in the desert and there was no one around. So of course all the smart ass guys had something to say. lol.
"Motorcycles! What about (if there were) Motorcycles? You just said they can come out of nowhere! You said it!"
"So, are you telling us we can do that? Fall asleep as long as we're in the desert?"
"Have you ever driven drunk in the desert, just to see what would happen? Have you ever done drugs?"
• At one point this guy Kenny went to the bathroom, and Chris was like "Put a chair up against the door so he can't get out!" and the teacher was quiet and this kid up front, Julian, was like "Dude, look, she's thinkin' about it!" haha cause she totally was. But she was like, "No, I couldn't do that.." but you could tell she wanted to, cause she didn't like Kenny.
• Paige & Kenny sort of got into it. He kept interrupting and she kept yelling @ him to STFU and eventually she was like, "What are you, 12??" Eventually he came back with, "Well, at least I'm responsible enough to not get pregnant!" I admit it, I lmao'd. She's a bitch.
• One of the guys (Vince or Chris) was like "You know what is always on 24/7?? LAW AND ORDER." LOL AMIRITE! Especially because that is literally all my mom watches. And they were talking about how whenever you stay home from school, you ALWAYS watch The Price is Right. x)
• Desert jokes continued for the duration of class. Everytime she said something, someone piped up with, "in the desert???"
• She told us that if you're over 18, it's illegal to be outside without ID. Chris laughed, "So am I going to need my ID when I check the mail or I could get arrested?" (And she said not on private property.) Julian added "What about when I'm walking my dog?" And they kept going. It's not so much the things she says, it's how she says them and makes them sound ridiculous.
• She had us do the beer goggles. None of the girls wanted to, but the boys wanted to keep them on and see if they could make it back to the classroom. (No.) Then someone asked if you could wear them while you're driving. She said no. He asked, "What if I was in the desert?" XD
• .40 - possible coma. She said "comma". I lol'd. It's like a living example of badfic. She probably writes it.
• Chris = How do you go to .50 (death) if you're in a coma? Do they have an IV of alcohol?
• Chris = I once had a friend who told me to drink bleach to get the alcohol out of my system. (And Teacher was like, WHAT? NO!) I know! I was like, I'm not going to kill myself dude. ("DO NOT DRINK BLEACH!" she tells us, like we're actually going to or something.)
• Teacher has actually done a Lot of Drugs. Not sure she is best candidate for driving instructor.
• "You can't drive and cry at the same time!" - Teacher (crywalkers?? lol)
• "You don't know who's out there with a gun!!" - Teacher re: road rage
• Tim flat out told her he would break check a guy for tailgating. She freaked out. He took it back.
• She told us she hydroplaned on purpose once. "Was it in the desert??" Every single person in the classroom asked, I shit you not.
• Last day, she's 45 minutes late. Most of us were waiting for more than an hour, because we all get there early. And she's always late, but this was crazy. We thought she got lost (you guessed it) in the desert. Turns out, she did get lost! Gavin called shenanigans: "You come here every day, I refuse to believe that!" She said she dropped off a student driver (she was driving the Yaris! But its a stick and IDontWantHerTeachingMeToDrive!) in Linthicum and got "turned around" trying to get back. Seriously, how does that happen? It's not very difficult.
• Some dude was standing around while we were waiting and got hit by a truck. Not really funny.
Also, I just made a freakishly long to-do list. Good thing it's 90% fun stuff :>
And I'm going to leave you with some FotC, cause it's stuck in my head.
COLD HEARTED BITCHHHH.