Fic: Lesser Known Phobias About Physics (B7)
Title: Lesser Known Phobias about Physics
Author: lost_spook
Rating: All ages
Word Count: 863
Characters/Pairings: Vila Restal, Dayna Mellanby, Kerr Avon, Soolin.
Notes/Warnings: S4, post-Orbit. Dodgy physics.
Summary: Vila’s got a new phobia, and it’s all about gravity, or maybe it isn’t.
For astrogirl2 and
aralias in the 500 Prompts Meme - prompt 254: And that’s when I stopped believing in gravity - Vila Restal.
***
“Vila -”
“No, really, there’s a name for it. I mean, gravity’s what keeps us from flying off out into space the moment we step out of doors, right? Nothing unreasonable about worrying about what happens when it stops being there.”
“And when did this so-called phobia develop?” said Avon. “Enlighten us, Vila. Was it by any chance the point where I informed everyone that Garria 4 is famous for its poisonous swamps?”
“Must have been coming on for ages, actually,” Vila said, and there was a darker note underlying his complaint this time. “I just didn’t notice.” Then he shifted about and gave Avon a smile. “Anyway, what are you going to do with me on a swamp planet?”
“Avon could feed you to the local wildlife,” put in Dayna. “I hear it’s vicious.”
“Hey, I’m inedible, thanks,” said Vila. “And definitely no use with poisonous swamps. I’ll stay and watch the base for you. Don’t all thank me at once.”
Soolin raised an eyebrow. “You’ve got a problem with artificial gravity on board Scorpio as well?”
“Look, you can’t go round believing in something you can switch on and off, can you?”
“Very well,” said Avon. “You’re right, Vila - I don’t need you. You can stay here with Dayna this time. Just try not to wreck the base while we’re gone. That goes for you, too, Dayna. Any risky new prototypes - take them outside this time.”
“There goes my plan for the afternoon,” said Dayna, giving him a grin. “Okay, Avon. I promise. I’ll even promise not to test anything out on Vila if you like.”
Vila looked across. “And it’s barophobia, by the way, Avon.”
“Vila?”
“I said there was a word for it.”
“Congratulations, Vila. You’ve mastered the art of using the dictionary at last - I’m stunned.”
“Don’t be. I asked Orac.” Vila folded his arms. “After all, that thing knows everything, doesn’t it, Avon?”
*
“So,” said Dayna, once the others had left. “What was that all about? You really hate swamps, you’ve had enough of Avon or... what are you up to, Vila?”
“Who says I can’t have a phobia about gravity? They come on suddenly, these things. Like I said, there’s a name for it.”
Dayna sat down next to him on the grey padded seat. “Seriously, Vila. If it’s Avon, I don’t think I blame you. Or even the swamps, for that matter.”
“No, look, think about it,” said Vila, turning his head towards her. “We’re all in space, right? So which way’s even up in the first place? We’ve probably all been going round standing on our heads all our lives.”
“I suppose that’s one way of looking at it.”
“And gravity’s what keeps us here - on the planet. But some planets have less of it. Right?”
“Well, you could put it like that.”
“So, what’s to stop this place suddenly deciding it doesn’t need as much and before you know it we’re not fixed to the ground any longer? Could happen, Dayna.”
Dayna screwed up her face in confusion. “No, it couldn’t. Physics doesn’t work like that.”
“There could be a catastrophic space collision or something,” said Vila. “Anyway, you can’t trust anything these days, that’s what I say. Not even gravity.”
She looked down for a moment and then back at him. “Okay, Vila. What’s wrong? I mean, something is. It’s been days since you even bothered making a suggestive remark. Don’t tell me that’s down to gravity, too.”
“Loss of levity? Suppose it sort of is,” said Vila and grinned at her. “Fits, doesn’t it?”
“Vila.” Then Dayna sighed. “Look, I’m not going to ask. I don’t know if I’d even want to know -”
“Thanks.”
“I might know how you feel, though.”
Vila looked at her again.
“Sometimes,” she said, in a tone he couldn’t decide if it was deadly serious or her brand of joking, “I have this feeling I’m going to stop believing in oxygen.”
“Physics,” said Vila. “Who needs it?”
“It’s not the sort of thing you can live without.”
Vila leant forward. “Okay, so in that case, how about we get drunk and wreck the base like Avon told us not to?”
“Vila!”
“What? It’s just… gravity seems to believe in me when I’m drunk, that’s all.”
“Vila. Anyway, I don’t think there’s enough wine left -”
“Now there,” said Vila, straightening up in his seat and heaving a sigh, “you’re probably right.” Not enough wine in the universe even. Maybe.
Dayna patted his arm. “How about we go outside and blow something up?”
Coming from Dayna, that was probably the nicest thing anyone had said to him all week.
“And,” she added, “if we do, and what goes up comes down, then… maybe you’ll be okay after all, Vila.”
“I wouldn’t count on it.”
“No,” said Dayna. “No guarantees, right?”
“Okay,” said Vila, deciding that while Dayna’s idea of fun was enough to make him wonder what they’d done with the board games (well, he knew the answer to that one as well), it was better than sulking. “Just don’t think this means I’m going to go round believing in any fancy invisible forces, all right?”
***
Crossposted from Dreamwidth -- Comments there:
Author: lost_spook
Rating: All ages
Word Count: 863
Characters/Pairings: Vila Restal, Dayna Mellanby, Kerr Avon, Soolin.
Notes/Warnings: S4, post-Orbit. Dodgy physics.
Summary: Vila’s got a new phobia, and it’s all about gravity, or maybe it isn’t.
For astrogirl2 and
aralias in the 500 Prompts Meme - prompt 254: And that’s when I stopped believing in gravity - Vila Restal.
***
“Vila -”
“No, really, there’s a name for it. I mean, gravity’s what keeps us from flying off out into space the moment we step out of doors, right? Nothing unreasonable about worrying about what happens when it stops being there.”
“And when did this so-called phobia develop?” said Avon. “Enlighten us, Vila. Was it by any chance the point where I informed everyone that Garria 4 is famous for its poisonous swamps?”
“Must have been coming on for ages, actually,” Vila said, and there was a darker note underlying his complaint this time. “I just didn’t notice.” Then he shifted about and gave Avon a smile. “Anyway, what are you going to do with me on a swamp planet?”
“Avon could feed you to the local wildlife,” put in Dayna. “I hear it’s vicious.”
“Hey, I’m inedible, thanks,” said Vila. “And definitely no use with poisonous swamps. I’ll stay and watch the base for you. Don’t all thank me at once.”
Soolin raised an eyebrow. “You’ve got a problem with artificial gravity on board Scorpio as well?”
“Look, you can’t go round believing in something you can switch on and off, can you?”
“Very well,” said Avon. “You’re right, Vila - I don’t need you. You can stay here with Dayna this time. Just try not to wreck the base while we’re gone. That goes for you, too, Dayna. Any risky new prototypes - take them outside this time.”
“There goes my plan for the afternoon,” said Dayna, giving him a grin. “Okay, Avon. I promise. I’ll even promise not to test anything out on Vila if you like.”
Vila looked across. “And it’s barophobia, by the way, Avon.”
“Vila?”
“I said there was a word for it.”
“Congratulations, Vila. You’ve mastered the art of using the dictionary at last - I’m stunned.”
“Don’t be. I asked Orac.” Vila folded his arms. “After all, that thing knows everything, doesn’t it, Avon?”
*
“So,” said Dayna, once the others had left. “What was that all about? You really hate swamps, you’ve had enough of Avon or... what are you up to, Vila?”
“Who says I can’t have a phobia about gravity? They come on suddenly, these things. Like I said, there’s a name for it.”
Dayna sat down next to him on the grey padded seat. “Seriously, Vila. If it’s Avon, I don’t think I blame you. Or even the swamps, for that matter.”
“No, look, think about it,” said Vila, turning his head towards her. “We’re all in space, right? So which way’s even up in the first place? We’ve probably all been going round standing on our heads all our lives.”
“I suppose that’s one way of looking at it.”
“And gravity’s what keeps us here - on the planet. But some planets have less of it. Right?”
“Well, you could put it like that.”
“So, what’s to stop this place suddenly deciding it doesn’t need as much and before you know it we’re not fixed to the ground any longer? Could happen, Dayna.”
Dayna screwed up her face in confusion. “No, it couldn’t. Physics doesn’t work like that.”
“There could be a catastrophic space collision or something,” said Vila. “Anyway, you can’t trust anything these days, that’s what I say. Not even gravity.”
She looked down for a moment and then back at him. “Okay, Vila. What’s wrong? I mean, something is. It’s been days since you even bothered making a suggestive remark. Don’t tell me that’s down to gravity, too.”
“Loss of levity? Suppose it sort of is,” said Vila and grinned at her. “Fits, doesn’t it?”
“Vila.” Then Dayna sighed. “Look, I’m not going to ask. I don’t know if I’d even want to know -”
“Thanks.”
“I might know how you feel, though.”
Vila looked at her again.
“Sometimes,” she said, in a tone he couldn’t decide if it was deadly serious or her brand of joking, “I have this feeling I’m going to stop believing in oxygen.”
“Physics,” said Vila. “Who needs it?”
“It’s not the sort of thing you can live without.”
Vila leant forward. “Okay, so in that case, how about we get drunk and wreck the base like Avon told us not to?”
“Vila!”
“What? It’s just… gravity seems to believe in me when I’m drunk, that’s all.”
“Vila. Anyway, I don’t think there’s enough wine left -”
“Now there,” said Vila, straightening up in his seat and heaving a sigh, “you’re probably right.” Not enough wine in the universe even. Maybe.
Dayna patted his arm. “How about we go outside and blow something up?”
Coming from Dayna, that was probably the nicest thing anyone had said to him all week.
“And,” she added, “if we do, and what goes up comes down, then… maybe you’ll be okay after all, Vila.”
“I wouldn’t count on it.”
“No,” said Dayna. “No guarantees, right?”
“Okay,” said Vila, deciding that while Dayna’s idea of fun was enough to make him wonder what they’d done with the board games (well, he knew the answer to that one as well), it was better than sulking. “Just don’t think this means I’m going to go round believing in any fancy invisible forces, all right?”
***
Crossposted from Dreamwidth -- Comments there: