(no subject)
So the past couple of days have been NUTS.
Luke and I took a break.. whatever the hell that means.
I just got sick of not being with some1 that wanted
the same things I do. Eh, were working on it.
For the past 3 days we havent really hugged or nething.
He asks if we can be boyfriend and girlfriend again,
I say no, because he doesnt know what its like
to miss some1. He shows no emotion whatsoever, so
I dont feel like he needs me, therefore he cannot have me.
I am stuborn.
My schedule this week is Sun- Thursday 4-10.
Im beat, 1 more day to go.
I had to leave school Tuesday early to go deposit
money into my moms account so that I could have
somewhere to stay during senior week lol.
Me, Luke, Brian, and Chris all left 4th.
Brian took Luke and I to Chirs' to get his money,
then he took me to the bank, taught me how to drive
stick, and then we went to TCBY. I <3 Brian, he is
cool, and I happen to <3 his Girlfriend even more!
Me Luke Brian and Julia are real good friends, I like
being able to hang out with another couple who have
been together for awhile.
Last night I worked, I was pretty shocked at my whole
relationship situation, we fight but Ive never been
happy to get a break. We were just hanging out as
friends all day, no kissing or hugging, well he tried,
but I pushed away, it was different and I felt better.
I didnt want to be hugging some1 that I had lost all
attraction too...so i didnt.
Got outa work around 9:30 and walked to my car, and
noticed that Lukes car was parked right next to mine.
He got out and gave me a hug, this time I hugged him back,
I figure he drove all the way out there, I wasnt going to be
cold and push him away if he was trying. He had given me
a locket a couple weeks ago that I wanted from Velvet lounge
but I had never put anything in it, he handed me a bag with
2 pictures cut out and messages on the backs of them.
That was thoughtfull. We talked for a bit, he didnt want
to have a break and wanted to just be cool like we had been
that day. I went home and talked to him. We decided
to not be so needy, which isnt hard for me, especially right
now when I dont particularly want him.
I guess I had become too attached, supposidly.
But Ive had a lot to be stressed about and Need some1
for, and thats why I guess I was needy or whatever. But
all girlfriends are needy.. they need attention.
I needed him when I was going to a doctors apt
every day for my headaches, I needed him to talk to
when I got home at work, I needed him to be with me
whenever he could, and apparently thats too much.
W.e Im not home enough to be with some1 "too much" .
Today things were fairly decent. Hes got bad allergies
and honselty cant breathe outside. We watched Desperate
Housewives before work and that went ok. Last night he fell
asleep on the phone with me ,and i think he may tonight
too, who knows. I told him If he wanted me, then he I suggest
that he fix some things and get his shit together or
I will have to find some1 else.
Thats all for now.
OVER AND OUT
<333 Steffani
Luke and I took a break.. whatever the hell that means.
I just got sick of not being with some1 that wanted
the same things I do. Eh, were working on it.
For the past 3 days we havent really hugged or nething.
He asks if we can be boyfriend and girlfriend again,
I say no, because he doesnt know what its like
to miss some1. He shows no emotion whatsoever, so
I dont feel like he needs me, therefore he cannot have me.
I am stuborn.
My schedule this week is Sun- Thursday 4-10.
Im beat, 1 more day to go.
I had to leave school Tuesday early to go deposit
money into my moms account so that I could have
somewhere to stay during senior week lol.
Me, Luke, Brian, and Chris all left 4th.
Brian took Luke and I to Chirs' to get his money,
then he took me to the bank, taught me how to drive
stick, and then we went to TCBY. I <3 Brian, he is
cool, and I happen to <3 his Girlfriend even more!
Me Luke Brian and Julia are real good friends, I like
being able to hang out with another couple who have
been together for awhile.
Last night I worked, I was pretty shocked at my whole
relationship situation, we fight but Ive never been
happy to get a break. We were just hanging out as
friends all day, no kissing or hugging, well he tried,
but I pushed away, it was different and I felt better.
I didnt want to be hugging some1 that I had lost all
attraction too...so i didnt.
Got outa work around 9:30 and walked to my car, and
noticed that Lukes car was parked right next to mine.
He got out and gave me a hug, this time I hugged him back,
I figure he drove all the way out there, I wasnt going to be
cold and push him away if he was trying. He had given me
a locket a couple weeks ago that I wanted from Velvet lounge
but I had never put anything in it, he handed me a bag with
2 pictures cut out and messages on the backs of them.
That was thoughtfull. We talked for a bit, he didnt want
to have a break and wanted to just be cool like we had been
that day. I went home and talked to him. We decided
to not be so needy, which isnt hard for me, especially right
now when I dont particularly want him.
I guess I had become too attached, supposidly.
But Ive had a lot to be stressed about and Need some1
for, and thats why I guess I was needy or whatever. But
all girlfriends are needy.. they need attention.
I needed him when I was going to a doctors apt
every day for my headaches, I needed him to talk to
when I got home at work, I needed him to be with me
whenever he could, and apparently thats too much.
W.e Im not home enough to be with some1 "too much" .
Today things were fairly decent. Hes got bad allergies
and honselty cant breathe outside. We watched Desperate
Housewives before work and that went ok. Last night he fell
asleep on the phone with me ,and i think he may tonight
too, who knows. I told him If he wanted me, then he I suggest
that he fix some things and get his shit together or
I will have to find some1 else.
Thats all for now.
OVER AND OUT
<333 Steffani