i have a "loser" bf...
So I was checking my email and this story was on the yahoo homepage yesterday and I clicked on it and when I read it it sounded all to familiar...
"Loser Guys and the Women Who Love Them"
Thu Jul 13, 12:05 PM ET
DEAR MARGO: Our 20-year-old daughter has been involved for two years with a young man who smokes, drinks too much, is controlling, quit school and can't hold down a job.
He has no car, so our daughter has to do all the driving back from college to see him every weekend. In no way is he the kind of potential son-in-law we would have hoped for, but it is looking as though this boy may be in our daughter's life for a long time.
Because we have objected to her relationship with him from the beginning, we have very little contact with him. More than anything, we want to maintain a good relationship with our daughter, whom we love. We would never want her to have to choose between him and us -- we know we would lose.
How can we deal with the worry over her making a life-altering mistake if she marries him? Is it hypocritical for us to try to accept this loser in order to keep close to our daughter? Why would a girl from a nice family choose a boy with such different values than she grew up with? -- DISAPPOINTED, SAD AND WORRIED
DEAR DIS: You are wise to imagine that you'd be on the losing end if you made your daughter choose right now. Tolerate the creep to the best of your ability so that you can maintain some kind of relationship.
I suspect down the line she will tire of this man's negatives, because a jobless drinker, who is also controlling, will not wear very well. (Then try hard not to say, "We told you so.")
As for why she's made this choice, there could be a million answers. High on my list would be rebellion, Fixer-of-Broken Persons Syndrome and masochism. Let us hope she learns that women are not reform schools, and also that the jerk is only her starter husband. -- Margo, futuristically
So I was kinda creeped out because this sounds like fuckin me!!!! If my parents did write this they made some mistakes, i'm not 20yr. old yet and my "loser" bf dosn't drink too much; he hardly drinks. I was scared to read this because it really hit home and made me think a whole lot more about the "creep" that I love endlessly...why? i don't know. What's funny is we break up and get back together and break up and get back together so many times that we just stopped asking each other back out and we aren't really "officially" together as a couple. I laughed too about the article...no better guy has offered me out on a date so what I am to do...I won't be able to get over my current bf if another guy (hopefully better and less flaws) won't grow the balls to ask me out on a date. I'm sure as hell not going to do it cuz i'm old-fashioned and stubborn.
"Loser Guys and the Women Who Love Them"
Thu Jul 13, 12:05 PM ET
DEAR MARGO: Our 20-year-old daughter has been involved for two years with a young man who smokes, drinks too much, is controlling, quit school and can't hold down a job.
He has no car, so our daughter has to do all the driving back from college to see him every weekend. In no way is he the kind of potential son-in-law we would have hoped for, but it is looking as though this boy may be in our daughter's life for a long time.
Because we have objected to her relationship with him from the beginning, we have very little contact with him. More than anything, we want to maintain a good relationship with our daughter, whom we love. We would never want her to have to choose between him and us -- we know we would lose.
How can we deal with the worry over her making a life-altering mistake if she marries him? Is it hypocritical for us to try to accept this loser in order to keep close to our daughter? Why would a girl from a nice family choose a boy with such different values than she grew up with? -- DISAPPOINTED, SAD AND WORRIED
DEAR DIS: You are wise to imagine that you'd be on the losing end if you made your daughter choose right now. Tolerate the creep to the best of your ability so that you can maintain some kind of relationship.
I suspect down the line she will tire of this man's negatives, because a jobless drinker, who is also controlling, will not wear very well. (Then try hard not to say, "We told you so.")
As for why she's made this choice, there could be a million answers. High on my list would be rebellion, Fixer-of-Broken Persons Syndrome and masochism. Let us hope she learns that women are not reform schools, and also that the jerk is only her starter husband. -- Margo, futuristically
So I was kinda creeped out because this sounds like fuckin me!!!! If my parents did write this they made some mistakes, i'm not 20yr. old yet and my "loser" bf dosn't drink too much; he hardly drinks. I was scared to read this because it really hit home and made me think a whole lot more about the "creep" that I love endlessly...why? i don't know. What's funny is we break up and get back together and break up and get back together so many times that we just stopped asking each other back out and we aren't really "officially" together as a couple. I laughed too about the article...no better guy has offered me out on a date so what I am to do...I won't be able to get over my current bf if another guy (hopefully better and less flaws) won't grow the balls to ask me out on a date. I'm sure as hell not going to do it cuz i'm old-fashioned and stubborn.