yes i write here cos i have no friends
Feeling damn sad and crappy cos fazer baybe got found out. So after his mom threw the megaest bitchfit ever, he relented (it was the only eventual outcome i foresaw while listening to the shouting an screaming from upstairs anw) and turned in his keys. it was so upsetting on so many levels.
1. Seeing him so sad yet trying to be normal for me
2. the domestic mayhem
3. feels like we've been robbed of all the convenience there ever was in our lives (since 2008 anw)
4. the regret that i did not do enough to keep it a secret
5. guilt from keeping it from her
of which 3 and 4 are the worse. cos the letter that came in the mailbox was a fine for illegal parking. IF ONLY i did as i said and got him season parking this wouldnt have happened. To save the $17 we lost the convenience of our ride. So fucking stupid. really, there is no other way to put it. Totally not worth it at all. Im quite pissed at him also for kiam-ing on that $17 when he can easily spend up to $40 on 4d. What the fuck right. But of course i couldnt bring myself to scold him cos he was alr damn upset and it is definitely a much greater loss to him than it is to me... Now i feel useless for not continuing my class 2B lessons cos if i did and had a license we could get a bike under my name and he could use it. But then again i know that is not the point. Its just not safe and we dont wanna die on the roads and waste our parents money break our parents' hearts. We'll get used to the commoner way (haha -..-) of transport (bus/mrt). i'll keep telling myself that.
1. Seeing him so sad yet trying to be normal for me
2. the domestic mayhem
3. feels like we've been robbed of all the convenience there ever was in our lives (since 2008 anw)
4. the regret that i did not do enough to keep it a secret
5. guilt from keeping it from her
of which 3 and 4 are the worse. cos the letter that came in the mailbox was a fine for illegal parking. IF ONLY i did as i said and got him season parking this wouldnt have happened. To save the $17 we lost the convenience of our ride. So fucking stupid. really, there is no other way to put it. Totally not worth it at all. Im quite pissed at him also for kiam-ing on that $17 when he can easily spend up to $40 on 4d. What the fuck right. But of course i couldnt bring myself to scold him cos he was alr damn upset and it is definitely a much greater loss to him than it is to me... Now i feel useless for not continuing my class 2B lessons cos if i did and had a license we could get a bike under my name and he could use it. But then again i know that is not the point. Its just not safe and we dont wanna die on the roads and waste our parents money break our parents' hearts. We'll get used to the commoner way (haha -..-) of transport (bus/mrt). i'll keep telling myself that.