Fic: IT'S AN ANOMALY!
Rating: PGish
Characters: Kirk, Spock, Sulu, Scotty, Bones, Connor, Abby, the Doctor
Summary: Don't even ask.
Warnings: No idea.
The crew of the USS Enterprise are just going through their daily ritual when suddenly, they're informed of some mysterious being beaming on to the ship.
It's a man with messy brown hair that seems to defy gravity, a long brown trench-coat, and big thick square eyeglasses.
He's escorted on to the bridge by Cupcake- er, Jeff- and introduces himself to the Captain.
"I'm the Doctor," he says, looking just a tad crazy.
"Who?" Kirk asks. He's met with a glare from Spock, so he tries again.
"How did you get here?" Kirk asks in his best captainly voice.
"I was time traveling in the T.A.R.D.I.S. and somehow ended up several hundred years ahead of what I anticipated. What year is it?"
Spock eyes the man suspiciously. Last time someone asked that, people died.
Kirk was about to answer when Bones burst on the bridge.
"Hey Jim, I was- DAMMIT, who is this?"
The crazy looking man turned to Bones and says simply, "I'm the Doctor."
There's a long pause before Bones shouts "Doctor my ass! I'm the doctor here, you crazy-"
He gets cut off by the sudden buzzing of an intercom.
"Captain, there seems to be...velociraptors on Deck Six," the voice says.
Everyone stands in silence. What the fuck?
And of course, to add to the weirdness, two figures materialize on the bridge, as well.
It appears to be a blonde girl, wearing a tank top and a scarf, and a brunette man, wearing a fedora and fingerless gloves.
"Where's the anomaly?" the man asks.
The Man who Calls Himself The Doctor starts yelling.
Jim takes the opportunity to saunter up to the blonde.
"Hey, how you doin? My name's-" Before he can finish, he gets both Vulcan nerve pinched (by Spock) and punched in the face (by Connor, the brunette guy in the fedora).
"Don't you dare touch Abby," he says.
The blonde (Abby) punches him in the shoulder.
"Connor, I told you already, we are not together!"
There's more arguing and yelling.
"Guys," Sulu tries, "There are still dinosaurs on Deck Six..."
But no one hears.
Suddenly Scotty bursts out of the turbo lift carrying a bat.
"WHERE ARE THE ZOMBEHS? EH? AYE KNOW THEY'RE HERE!"
Everyone goes silent. Suddenly, Bones noticing an unconscious Jim bleeding all over the floor.
"DAMMIT JIM."
Yup, just another day on the Enterprise, it is.