(no subject)
Well time for an update I suppose!!
Things are going quite well. Still at my placement at the hospital. Its fun, but starting to become a bit of a drag, mainly because I work there for free! And this week I have been on afternoons and don't finish until 9.30, so I feel like I have hardly seen Ben at all, even though I stay there every night. There's so much sadness, too. So much sickness and bad news and death. The other day a lady died and I had to make her up (i.e take all her needles and bits and bobs out) then wrap her in a sheet and I went down to the morgue with the orderlies to see what it was like. It was damn creepy, exactly like what you would imagine out of a horror movie! And the orderlies were trying to scare me too, which they did. There are some happy times too and lots of new experiences... I just need to find a way to deal with the sad stuff, because its starting to weigh me down and I'm so drained, physically and emotionally. I'm sure its one of those things you learn. Last night I was so tired and missing Ben and hormonal I got home (well to Ben's) and had a big old girly cry but I felt a lot better when I woke up this morning.
Over the last week I have been thinking a bit about moving in with Ben. We have discussed it before and I have been a bit freaked out due to previous experiences but this last week, I have been feeling good about it. My thinking has changed from I want to move in together because I want commitment to, I want to move in together because I want to be with him and come home to him and I just do. Which feels a lot better and I am more comfortable with that. This week I was going to stay at home because I finish late and he starts early but by Tuesday (after 1 night alone, lol) I missed him so much I just wanted to go home to him and that kind of made up my mind. I mentioned it to him this morning and he seemed excited but he doesn't want to move to a more expensive place at the moment and I'm not too keen to live in his place because its kind of a dump, but it would be alright for a couple of months and it would give us time to find a better place as well. And it would be cheap as too and a lot closer to town, so I will save a bit of money. So I think I will tell Cherie next week which scares me... I don't think she will take it too well. But its just one of those things... I have to do whats best for me and I hope she can understand that.
Last Saturday night was my sister's 18th birthday bus trip, but the bus broke down and it got cancelled! Which really sucked because Michelle was real gutted, it was supposed to be like the funnest, drunkest night and it was ruined. She's getting a free bus for tomorrow night but it won't be the same, everyone was kind of amped for Saturday. Well life throws you these things sometimes doesnt it. I'm going to take the day off from the hospital tomorrow, I really feel the need for a break being halfway through placement and I'm exhausted, 2 days off will be just what I need. (Seeing as I work Sundays... haven't had 2 days off for a long time).
Anyhoo going to watch home and Away now and then Outrageous Fortune taped from the other night, tirrah.
Things are going quite well. Still at my placement at the hospital. Its fun, but starting to become a bit of a drag, mainly because I work there for free! And this week I have been on afternoons and don't finish until 9.30, so I feel like I have hardly seen Ben at all, even though I stay there every night. There's so much sadness, too. So much sickness and bad news and death. The other day a lady died and I had to make her up (i.e take all her needles and bits and bobs out) then wrap her in a sheet and I went down to the morgue with the orderlies to see what it was like. It was damn creepy, exactly like what you would imagine out of a horror movie! And the orderlies were trying to scare me too, which they did. There are some happy times too and lots of new experiences... I just need to find a way to deal with the sad stuff, because its starting to weigh me down and I'm so drained, physically and emotionally. I'm sure its one of those things you learn. Last night I was so tired and missing Ben and hormonal I got home (well to Ben's) and had a big old girly cry but I felt a lot better when I woke up this morning.
Over the last week I have been thinking a bit about moving in with Ben. We have discussed it before and I have been a bit freaked out due to previous experiences but this last week, I have been feeling good about it. My thinking has changed from I want to move in together because I want commitment to, I want to move in together because I want to be with him and come home to him and I just do. Which feels a lot better and I am more comfortable with that. This week I was going to stay at home because I finish late and he starts early but by Tuesday (after 1 night alone, lol) I missed him so much I just wanted to go home to him and that kind of made up my mind. I mentioned it to him this morning and he seemed excited but he doesn't want to move to a more expensive place at the moment and I'm not too keen to live in his place because its kind of a dump, but it would be alright for a couple of months and it would give us time to find a better place as well. And it would be cheap as too and a lot closer to town, so I will save a bit of money. So I think I will tell Cherie next week which scares me... I don't think she will take it too well. But its just one of those things... I have to do whats best for me and I hope she can understand that.
Last Saturday night was my sister's 18th birthday bus trip, but the bus broke down and it got cancelled! Which really sucked because Michelle was real gutted, it was supposed to be like the funnest, drunkest night and it was ruined. She's getting a free bus for tomorrow night but it won't be the same, everyone was kind of amped for Saturday. Well life throws you these things sometimes doesnt it. I'm going to take the day off from the hospital tomorrow, I really feel the need for a break being halfway through placement and I'm exhausted, 2 days off will be just what I need. (Seeing as I work Sundays... haven't had 2 days off for a long time).
Anyhoo going to watch home and Away now and then Outrageous Fortune taped from the other night, tirrah.