Fic: Of Schoolgirl Fantasy
Title: Of Schoolgirl Fantasy
Pairing/Character(s): Kurt/Blaine, various OC teenagers
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Word Count: Just over 750
Spoilers: This is AU, so none.
Standard-Issue Short-Form Disclaimer: I do not hold copyright to Glee, make no claims to it, and am not writing this for profit.
Summary: In which Kurt and Blaine are still extremely attractive, and their daughter is mercilessly embarrassed about it (although her friends don't seem to mind.)
Author’s Notes: Written to fill a prompt: not stripper verse, I'm sorry, but how about daddy!klaine with kids that are at teenager age? First boyfriend/girlfriend // PTA etc.
But I made it stripper!verse, because I'm a terrible human being.
There is this look that they get, sometimes, when they’re bumbling around Bethany’s school, trying to find all of her classrooms on the first night of parent-teacher conferences, hopeless and lost. It’s not the kind of look that Kurt would have expected to get when he was younger, not the suspicious, cornered look of some bigot come face to face with the Homosexual Agenda in his child’s school. It’s… friendly. Giddy, almost. And expectant, too, as though even now, Kurt’s husband is nothing more than the harbinger of a crowd of strippers just waiting to descend en masse and delight and thrill a crowd of middle-aged mothers.
Sometimes, Kurt regrets their decision to appear in Artie’s documentary.
But then again, it is a lot easier to find classrooms when half the mothers here are fluttering their eyelashes and swooning whenever Blaine comes into close proximity, so he guesses it worked out overall.
*
Sugar swears she doesn’t have a teenage daughter, but Kurt’s still not convinced. Tessa is just like her, fake fur, leopard print, junk food addiction and all. And they both make the same face whenever they see Blaine, with the wide, starry eyes and the hands clasped beneath the chin and the dreamy, open-mouthed smile.
Kurt’s not really bothered by it. Bethany is; of course she is. Bethany rolls her eyes and huffs and stomps and glares and drags Tessa off to her bedroom and turns her music until neither of her dads can hear Tessa’s occasional squeal of “But he’s still so gorgeous!” But Kurt’s comfortable in his marriage - if he could handle sending Blaine off to work around gorgeous, mostly-naked men four nights a week for their first few years together, he can handle a giggling teenage girl - and so instead he just waits until the girls are safely gone before locking his hands under his chin, widening his eyes, and cooing “Oh, Mr. Hummel-Anderson!”
And Blaine just laughs and kisses him until he has to drop his hands to Blaine’s waist and kiss him back properly.
*
Kurt slips away in the middle of Bethany’s volleyball game, not because he’s not very interested in the spiking and the setting, but because he is desperately in need of terrible popcorn, watery Diet Coke, and Junior Mints (she’d understand, he’s sure), and when he comes back, there’s a skinny, pimple-faced boy wedged up against Blaine’s side, saying “I mean, I know you’re not, like, interested in the girls, or whatever. But if, like, you had been. I mean, you totally could have. Right?”
And Kurt very discreetly settles at Blaine’s side, trying not to snicker audibly, as Blaine stammers out, “Well… I mean it’s not like… It was never really about that, and I don’t think… I mean, women, you know, they’re not just there for…”
“What he means to say,” Kurt finally says, leaning in, “is that while stripping puts you around a lot of women, you won’t be attractive to them unless you show them respect. Blaine is very respectful. That’s why girls love him so much.”
He squeezes Blaine’s arm; Blaine gives him a reproachful look.
The teenager just looks confused, and after a few seconds, he heads back to join his friends.
“If it helps,” Kurt adds, scooting in a little closer to his husband’s side. “Boys love you too.”
Blaine’s look softens a bit; he reaches out to snag some popcorn from the cup on Kurt’s lap. “Yeah, well,” he says. “There’s only one that actually matters.”
They smile at each other, and Kurt can tell from the look on Blaine’s face that he’s not the only one who wants to lean in for a kiss. Instead, they just look at each other, and after a while, Kurt leans in and rests his head on Blaine’s shoulder, and it’s not enough, but it’s close.
*
Victoria is a new friend; Kurt doesn’t know a lot about her, except he’s pretty sure she was named after Posh Spice. It would make the hair make more sense, anyway. But she seems nice enough, if maybe a little more mature than some of Bethany’s other friends. A little more confident, a little less girlish, a little bolder. But still nice.
Then she sidles up to Kurt in the kitchen and asks, sweetly, “So are you still, like, super-flexible? Because that is so sexy. Like, really, really sexy.”
She doesn’t even look put-out when Blaine starts laughing his head off.
Pairing/Character(s): Kurt/Blaine, various OC teenagers
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Word Count: Just over 750
Spoilers: This is AU, so none.
Standard-Issue Short-Form Disclaimer: I do not hold copyright to Glee, make no claims to it, and am not writing this for profit.
Summary: In which Kurt and Blaine are still extremely attractive, and their daughter is mercilessly embarrassed about it (although her friends don't seem to mind.)
Author’s Notes: Written to fill a prompt: not stripper verse, I'm sorry, but how about daddy!klaine with kids that are at teenager age? First boyfriend/girlfriend // PTA etc.
But I made it stripper!verse, because I'm a terrible human being.
There is this look that they get, sometimes, when they’re bumbling around Bethany’s school, trying to find all of her classrooms on the first night of parent-teacher conferences, hopeless and lost. It’s not the kind of look that Kurt would have expected to get when he was younger, not the suspicious, cornered look of some bigot come face to face with the Homosexual Agenda in his child’s school. It’s… friendly. Giddy, almost. And expectant, too, as though even now, Kurt’s husband is nothing more than the harbinger of a crowd of strippers just waiting to descend en masse and delight and thrill a crowd of middle-aged mothers.
Sometimes, Kurt regrets their decision to appear in Artie’s documentary.
But then again, it is a lot easier to find classrooms when half the mothers here are fluttering their eyelashes and swooning whenever Blaine comes into close proximity, so he guesses it worked out overall.
*
Sugar swears she doesn’t have a teenage daughter, but Kurt’s still not convinced. Tessa is just like her, fake fur, leopard print, junk food addiction and all. And they both make the same face whenever they see Blaine, with the wide, starry eyes and the hands clasped beneath the chin and the dreamy, open-mouthed smile.
Kurt’s not really bothered by it. Bethany is; of course she is. Bethany rolls her eyes and huffs and stomps and glares and drags Tessa off to her bedroom and turns her music until neither of her dads can hear Tessa’s occasional squeal of “But he’s still so gorgeous!” But Kurt’s comfortable in his marriage - if he could handle sending Blaine off to work around gorgeous, mostly-naked men four nights a week for their first few years together, he can handle a giggling teenage girl - and so instead he just waits until the girls are safely gone before locking his hands under his chin, widening his eyes, and cooing “Oh, Mr. Hummel-Anderson!”
And Blaine just laughs and kisses him until he has to drop his hands to Blaine’s waist and kiss him back properly.
*
Kurt slips away in the middle of Bethany’s volleyball game, not because he’s not very interested in the spiking and the setting, but because he is desperately in need of terrible popcorn, watery Diet Coke, and Junior Mints (she’d understand, he’s sure), and when he comes back, there’s a skinny, pimple-faced boy wedged up against Blaine’s side, saying “I mean, I know you’re not, like, interested in the girls, or whatever. But if, like, you had been. I mean, you totally could have. Right?”
And Kurt very discreetly settles at Blaine’s side, trying not to snicker audibly, as Blaine stammers out, “Well… I mean it’s not like… It was never really about that, and I don’t think… I mean, women, you know, they’re not just there for…”
“What he means to say,” Kurt finally says, leaning in, “is that while stripping puts you around a lot of women, you won’t be attractive to them unless you show them respect. Blaine is very respectful. That’s why girls love him so much.”
He squeezes Blaine’s arm; Blaine gives him a reproachful look.
The teenager just looks confused, and after a few seconds, he heads back to join his friends.
“If it helps,” Kurt adds, scooting in a little closer to his husband’s side. “Boys love you too.”
Blaine’s look softens a bit; he reaches out to snag some popcorn from the cup on Kurt’s lap. “Yeah, well,” he says. “There’s only one that actually matters.”
They smile at each other, and Kurt can tell from the look on Blaine’s face that he’s not the only one who wants to lean in for a kiss. Instead, they just look at each other, and after a while, Kurt leans in and rests his head on Blaine’s shoulder, and it’s not enough, but it’s close.
*
Victoria is a new friend; Kurt doesn’t know a lot about her, except he’s pretty sure she was named after Posh Spice. It would make the hair make more sense, anyway. But she seems nice enough, if maybe a little more mature than some of Bethany’s other friends. A little more confident, a little less girlish, a little bolder. But still nice.
Then she sidles up to Kurt in the kitchen and asks, sweetly, “So are you still, like, super-flexible? Because that is so sexy. Like, really, really sexy.”
She doesn’t even look put-out when Blaine starts laughing his head off.