I had a heart then but the queen has been overthrown.

[salylimon]

WHO: Emiliana and Ivan
WHEN: October 8th, Saturday afternoon
WHERE: Ivan's abode
WHAT: Boyfriend moves back to Canada. Spend the last month or so in a glass case of emotion. Get comforted by currently ill ex-boyfriend. What do you mean society finds this set-up odd?

Comments

[das_vedanya]

At the very least, Ivan knew that he had a talent for faking even the most sincere and genuine smiles - perhaps he'd never really smiled a day in his life - but this talent of his also gave him the ability to detect the falsity in another's. And Emiliana looked anything but happy.

"I am feeling better," he replied, proud of his state in that he could properly clothe himself this morning instead of remaining in baggy clothing with a thick quilt wrapped around his shoulders. But that did not mean that he looked entirely presentable. His hair was still unkempt, voice slightly nasally, and having to suppress a cough after those words fled his mouth. "But I am not the one to be worried about here, Emimi." He stepped back to allow her inside, shutting the door and sealing in the almost unbearable warmth of his house. "I am more worried about you."

[salylimon]

"What's a little heartbreak?" Emi replied evasively, moving to step inside before pausing to get a better look at the blonde. Brow furrowing, she took in his still rather rumbled state with a concerned expression, hand carefully placing the bag of food down before coming to rest on the Russian's arm. "But you don't sound all that better, Ivancito."

Biting her lip, she took a half-step back before glancing in the direction of the kitchen. "I can warm you up some tea if you'd like. I brought some soup and dessert if you can stomach it."

[das_vedanya]

Ivan laughed at this. "Emimi, you do not... have to come in here and take care of me. I invited you here for your benefit, not my own." The older man sniffed, "Please allow me to put the kettle on, at least."

He did just that, venturing to the kitchen while readjusting the blanket over his shoulders, lifting the kettle, filling it, and then settling it on the flame of his stove. "I'm sorry to hear about Jared... not as sorry as I am to hear about you, but..."

[salylimon]

Trailing after the blonde into the kitchen, Emi allowed herself the briefest of moments to let the smile instantly drop from her face. Hand settling on the kitchen counter, she hummed absently in response to Ivan's comments, too busy digging her teeth into her bottom lip to keep her voice from wavering to properly respond.

Inhaling shakily, she gave a small laugh of her own, eyes locked on the counter top as she stood apart from him. "I'm just being silly. You know how I get."

[das_vedanya]

"Da, I do know how you get," The Russian admitted as he lowered two cups onto the counter before him. "That is why I have reason to be worried." Sighing, he finally turned back to face her. "And that is exactly why I know you are not just 'being silly.' I am... not trying to push my profession onto you, Emi, but... if you want to talk to me about it, I will listen."

[salylimon]

"I-It's just," Her breath hitched, eyes focused on her fingers as they clenched and unclenched on top of the counter. She could feel her eyes beginning to sting, her throat beginning to tighten and her heart ache as every negative thought and emotion began to rush back to her. It was ironic, though, she couldn't help but think, being in such a situation with her ex-boyfriend. Heart aching and feeling smaller and more vulnerable than she's ever felt before, but for an entirely different reason

[das_vedanya]

The Russian's mouth twitched, not into a smile, because he thought that perhaps a reassuring smile was not what she needed right now. He simply stood, almost to the point of being petrified, and wondered why it was easy to see strangers in his office cry and so difficult to see her perform the same action.

Tentatively, he placed his hand atop hers, unsure if he was allowed to do such a thing while she was in this state. He offered her the tail end to his scarf and dabbed a tear rolling down her cheek. "If it is meant to be, it will be. Distance is only a factor, and in this day and age, I know that these things can be more easily overcome than you think..."

[salylimon]

Any attempt to offer the Russian a grateful smile, no doubt, potentially came off as a grimace as Emi sniffled, shaky breaths escaping her lips as she fought to get herself under control. She did, however, turn her hand over, fingers interlacing with Ivan's as she gave his hand an appreciative squeeze.

She remained silent for a moment, the only sounds consisting of her badly muffled whimpers as Emi found herself still incapable of fully calming herself down. Shaking her head and teeth digging into the already badly worried skin of her bottom lip, she glanced away from the blonde. "W-We...w-we've actually been getting distance since he left in August," Emi murmured, sniffling. "I-I...think we might be...tonight...I-Ivan, I can't. I can't," she sobbed out, slumping against the kitchen counter as she found herself unable to hold herself up properly.

[das_vedanya]

The Russian sidled closer to her, returning the pressure of the squeeze on his hand. "Tonight? Emi- Emishka...!" Ivan knelt down enough to gather her into his arms and keep her from falling to the floor. Slowly, gently. the two of them descended until they were both sitting on the floor with backs against the counter. "I would not think so poorly of the situation. Things will get better. They always get better..." What a lie that was, and no one knew that better than Ivan-

"It will not be so soon... you two are stronger than that."

[salylimon]

Shaking her head, Emi refrained from commenting as she shakily exhaled. Teeth still digging into her bottom lip before she eventually allowed her head to rest against Ivan's shoulder, mind not entirely processing that they were now seated on the floor as she practically slumped into the taller man's side. "That's what I keep telling myself," she eventually whispered, eyes trained on the tile floor beneath her.

"Every time I get my heart broken, I always tell myself that-" She could feel her throat tighten, emotion suddenly thickening her accent as she forced herself to trudge on. "But sometimes it's just really hard for me to believe that, n-no matter how hard I pretend or how much I-I believe I've convinced myself."
(Reply to this)

[das_vedanya]

Ivan swallowed at this, because unintentionally or not, Emi had just alluded to their awful breakup - he had broken her heart. As she settled against him, he found his hand resting atop hers again in quiet assurance.

"I am sorry, Emi. I wish things could work the way we want them to, especially for you, but it doesn't."

[salylimon]

Giving a pitiful shrug, Emi made no move to pull away from the older man. Instead, she gave another weak sigh. "I'll be fine," she eventually murmured tiredly. "I'm just being hysterical. I'll be fine. I-I'm always fine after a while," Emi continued, her hand shaking slightly beneath Ivan's.

Not bothering to look him in the eyes just yet, she shifted, burrowing her face against his arm, hand reaching up to curl her fingers into his shirt. "S-Sorry," she breathed out, eyes clenching closed as she allowed herself to be comforted by the faint warmth and almost nostalgic comfort from Ivan's more solid form. "Sorry, I just-" she unintentionally nuzzled her face into his arm, teeth continuing to dig into her bottom lip painfully.

I SUCK AT COMFORTING...

[das_vedanya]

"Emi-" he felt himself sink against the side of the counter as she sank against him. His arm curled around her waist carefully, worried that any more movement could cause her to break. "Emi, it is okay... I promise you will be okay. Everything will work out with him."

AND I SUCK AT BEING EMOTIONAL.

[salylimon]

"Yeah," Emi murmured weakly. "Yeah, maybe..." She sniffled, practically clinging to the older blonde as she slowly forced herself to calm down. It took a moment, but eventually she found herself relaxing further against Ivan as she sighed.

"M'sorry," she mumbled against his shoulder. "I-I'm just an awkward mess right now," she said with a weak laugh.

[das_vedanya]

"You are lucky that your friend is a therapist, Emi," Ivan managed a week laugh, the joke lost almost on a choke of his own frown. "I am used to such awkward messes." He settled against the counter, softening with a sigh. "And you have a right to be upset."

[salylimon]

"I'd rather you be my friend than play the therapist," Emi murmured, pulling away somewhat before resting her head against his shoulder. Slowly, she untangled her hand from his shirt and let it fall limply on top of her lap. "But I'll be fine," she quietly promised. "It's just....too much for me to take right now but I'll-We'll be fine. With whatever happens."