Comments | lolocracy: I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MONKEY-FIGHTING SNAKES...

longlivesealand in lolocracy

I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MONKEY-FIGHTING SNAKES...

Jan 22, 2011 00:44

WHO: Siri and Princess Patience~
WHEN: January 22nd, 02:11 AM~
WHERE: A plane, somewhere over in the sky~
WHAT: Siri and Patience's trip back from Chicago turns deadly thanks to some unwelcome passengers.

( ON THIS MONDAY-TO-FRIDAY PLANE!! )

oh god what just happened?!, 911 what's your emergency?, girl you look fierce, sealand, status: dead, fight fight fight fight!, girls just wanna have fun, come on guys - let's get aggressive!, ain't nuthin' but a g thang, isn't that illegal?, we're not in kansas anymore, norway, bitch you made my girl cry, you've got red on you, !event: genderbender week, you won't like me when i'm angry, history won't repeat this shit, b-but i'm allergic to crying..., it's time to nyar

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Damn straight I wouldn't. $4 for a bag of nuts is highway robbery talks_to_nisse January 22 2011, 19:11:33 UTC

Siri sighed as Patience interrupted her place yet again. It seemed as if it would be best if she just set her book aside. The trip to Chicago had been fun; Patience had enjoyed Navy Pier and shopping along the Magnificent Mile. Siri herself had great success in the now-closing Borders, able to score plenty of volumes for very little ( ... )

IS THIS WHAT HAPPENED IN THE MOVIE? IDFEK. longlivesealand January 23 2011, 05:28:12 UTC

Patience closed her eyes for a few seconds and simply tried her hardest to relax. Turbulence was an integral part of air-travelling, and as a frequent flyer, she should not be behaving so shamefully. The man beside them was already giving her odd looks ( ... )

Just about. I really don't feel the need to include the molesting snake or the snake who likes cock talks_to_nisse January 23 2011, 08:39:29 UTC

Siri couldn't help but snort at Patience's face. Very cute, to be sure, but it wasn't going to help Patience get her way. "Not a chance," she replied instead. "You have a bad track record with electronics, and I'm not about to chance you blowing it up. Especially on an airplane ( ... )

... Why was Samuel L. Jackson in this movie again? longlivesealand January 23 2011, 12:39:51 UTC

Patience convinced herself that she had overreacted. Then again, it wasn't common for her to see someone suddenly dropping to the ground without a sign of life. At Siri's comment, she unbuckled her seat belt and climbed over to the middle seat. The man next to them was equally nervous, though he did a better job at hiding it than the quivering Patience.

"-s he all right? Did he have a heart attack?"

What bothered Patience, aside from the collapsed man, was that though many passengers had pressed for the flight attendants, no one had come. She looked up and saw that the symbols were all lit, but yet, there was no response.

"W-where is... Why isn't anyone coming?" she said, mostly to herself.

Her hands gripped the armrest as she watched Siri check the man then suddenly the Norwegian was stepping on the man's chest. From her angle, Patience hadn't quite seen the black head that had popped out. All she saw was Siri stomping out the life from the man. Her lips quivered. Surely, her dearest auntie wouldn't be so cruel... and in front ( ... )

To be the one with the bad motherfucker wal--Imean, he's the FBI agent protecting the dumb twit talks_to_nisse January 24 2011, 18:29:55 UTC

"Put your feet up," Siri barked in response, reaching for her purse to grab her hardbound collection of Sherlock Holmes. A bit unwieldy, maybe, but it was hopefully heavy enough to stun another snake if it arose.

And she had a bad feeling that another would. One snake, potentially venomous enough to kill a full grown man, loose on a plane was unbelievable. It would be foolish to assume that such an unbelievable thing would only happen once.

Handing the volume to Patience, Siri examined the area around their seats for signs of any other reptiles. Spotting nothing, she crouched atop Patience's vacant seat.

Lowering her voice, she leaned towards Patience. "Yes, it was a snake. I don't know if it killed him, or if it was the only one. So keep an eye out--"

She was interrupted by a shriek from the behind them. "SNAAAAKEEE! IT'S ON ME GET IT OFF!"

Oh SLJ... why so awesome. vAv longlivesealand January 25 2011, 02:05:50 UTC

Patience put her feet up with a hand to prevent any unintentional flashing. The situation might be dangerous, but she had to be a proper lady above all. When she was handled the volume of Sherlock Holmes, she took it without protest, though she wished Siri realized it wasn't the time to read anymore ( ... )

Can he have a cameo? talks_to_nisse January 26 2011, 08:58:33 UTC

Staring down the aisle, Siri froze, undecided. Just what were you supposed to do when snakes saw fit to invade a small, enclosed space with plenty of clutter? Would it be best to get up off the ground, but under another area that could potentially hide snakes? She couldn't even tell how many there were or where they were coming from ( ... )

... YES. longlivesealand January 27 2011, 05:13:33 UTC

Patience didn't want to move. If it was up to her, she would stay exactly where she was until all the snakes were gone. After all, what did they know about handling snakes? Unfortunately, Siri had the exact opposite idea ( ... )

AWESOME talks_to_nisse January 28 2011, 08:09:53 UTC

Siri didn't want to split up from Patience, but at the same time she did not want her around a man with a gun who may or may not be the air marshal. He didn't look like one, and Siri was fairly certain that sleeping during the flight was frowned upon. On the other hand, Siri could not think of anyone else who would so brazenly wear a gun with today's heightened security ( ... )

longlivesealand January 30 2011, 07:01:22 UTC

Patience didn't like it, but she knew she had do it. Nodding, she let go of Siri's sleeve, took another look at the man, and hurried toward the end of the cabin. As she ran down the aisle, some passengers stirred to her footsteps. She muttered soft apologies as she jogged, her mind bothered by the visible lack of flight attendants and abandoned food cart next to the lavatory ( ... )

Aha sorry this took so long talks_to_nisse February 2 2011, 18:17:03 UTC

Finally releasing her, the man demanded Siri explain exactly what she meant. After she gave him a brief, detailed summation of what happened, he shook his head. "I'm sure it's just a fluke, or the start of mass hysteria," he told her. She noticed, though, that he nudged the man next to him awake. "Go back to your seat," he advised her. "You're not allowed in this cabin."

Siri was about to fight him on the dismissal when Patience came running back. Kneeling down next to her prone figure, Siri tried to make out her niece's message through her stammering.

"The lady? The...flight attendant?" she repeated. "What's wrong..." Oh. The flight attendant was probably...right.

Taking Patience into her arms, Siri tried to calm the girl down. "I'm sorry, Patience, you shouldn't have had to see that. But I need you to calm down. We won't be able to do anything if we panic."

Glaring up at the man, Siri turned her ire on him. "Do you believe me now? This clearly isn't just hysteria. There is no way a woman in your compartment would ( ... )

\o/;; longlivesealand February 18 2011, 23:56:33 UTC

The man did get up. He set his glare on Siri and reached to adjust his jacket so his gun remained hidden. For now. He rudely pushed Siri out of his way and strutted down the aisle, as if he was John Wayne in a cowboy western. He stopped a way down and whispered to another man seated. Both men turned their heads and looked back at Siri's direction for a brief moment before they turned back and continued to chat.

"Siri." Patience's voice broke the tense silence. Her hand, trembling, reached to lock with Siri's. Her voice was already breaking. "Are they going to land the plane? They must, mustn't they? They can't let people be on the plane if there is a danger, yes?"

Then her lips quivered, but she did not cry. She tried to act brave and swallowed her fear. Mama had taught her to be a strong girl, and she mustn't cry.

"We'll be all right, won't we, Siri?"

NEVØ! talks_to_nisse February 19 2011, 06:40:09 UTC

"I..." Siri trailed off as the man went off down the aisle. "I don't know. If they don't realize the problem, or if the ground traffic control doesn't clear a runway in time...we might have to push on through to our original destination." That was assuming the pilots survived this trip, though seeing as the plane was still in the air, Siri assumed they were still, at this moment, alive. No need to mention the possibility it might be otherwise until it became a probably. "You'll be fine," Siri promised. She would make sure of it ( ... )

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