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[lollywog]

Well today is a much better and generally happier day! Went to the docs yesterday who has doubled the happy pills. Im not totally happy about this as I tend to get insomnia on a larger dose. Boooooo, no coffe or cola for me! Anywho, I think I just managed to pull myself together yesterday. I know you should never say that to another depressed

Comments

[bobsypuff]

Well I kinda understand where you are coming from here. When our friendship dissolved it felt like I'd broken up with a boyfriend or something, it hurt THAT badly, which is why I couldn't get in contact til now, til I'd sorted my head a bit and got past the anger, the hurt and the pain of losing someone so important to me.

Now I'm more calm about the whole thing I can finally admit to myself that I have missed you too, lots.

I really want to meet up again and try to become friends, but I'm afraid..... that it won't be the same, that it'll be all stilted and awkward or that too much has happened in our lives since we last spoke for us to have anything in common anymore.

I miss our fun, I miss laughing til we cried and til my sides ached, I miss being a team at the quiz and ALWAYS beating the boys, I miss the pool games where we took all night to hit any of the damn balls, I miss choosing songs on the jukebox that we knew would annoy the boys, I miss the boys too. I miss shopping for clothes together, I miss buying each other silly birthday and christmas pressies, I miss feeling guilty for drinking anything that wasn't Diet Coke, I just miss YOU. I miss US. I miss everything we were about and everything we did.

Am I freaking YOU out now? :)

[lollywog]

not at all i just feel like laughing and crying all at once! I dont think it really matters if things arent the same, well, we both know they arent going to be, but that doesent mean it cant be good again. When we meet up again it will be auquard, which is why we should pick mutural ground and somewhere suitable. But it seems we are both thinkng the same way at the mo....I think we should just meet up and give it a try.

[bobsypuff]

I know, I felt like laughing and crying whilst typing it, I agree it's gonna be awkward when we meet and that we should try to do it somewhere neutral. The only place I can think of is the pub, but it's not exactly ideal for having a proper talk is it? I dunno what you you think?

[lollywog]

not the pub, as like you say its not goodfor talking. i thought somewhere in townmight be better, like a cafe or something.

[bobsypuff]

The pub holds too many memories doesn't it, I haven't set foot in the place since I walked out back in Sept last year. I used to drive past it on the way to work everyday and think about being in there with you lot.

I've seen you lots recently in your car on the way to work, some days I was a car in front of you, sometimes I was just behind you, neither of us acknowledged each other so I wondered if you'd noticed, although I don't have the black car anymore so you might not have done.

Umm yes, a cafe is probably a good idea, just not the Merrie England, it smells of bleach and makes me wanna be sick.

[lollywog]

no, merrie england sucks. no i havent seen u in your car. im normally a million miles away when im driving to work. i havent been to the pub very much since then either. i go occasionally to the qiz but very rarely now. its just boring with the boys! no offence to the boys of course but thy are soooo horribly blokey! also ive not really been up to it that often. i like being on my own whe im down as i worry i will anoy people or bring them down with me. also the insomnia is an issue as i cant drink alcohol or coke when it effects me! anyway. im sure we could find a nice cafe to chill in..

[bobsypuff]

We'll have to arrange something.

D'ya like my new icon? I've just been messing about with piccies we took at graduation on Weds, i liked this coat one :)

[lollywog]

yes, your new icon is funnnn. maybe try a brolley next time though! graduation gowns are propper annoying, was just reading your last entry.

[bobsypuff]

I took a brolley but it's a pants one from the pound shop and it doesn't stay up! I have requested a new one from the Christmas Bear!

I felt like a proper idiot in the graduation outfit! they're not the most flattering of outfits! they're gloried capes wouldn't you agree?

[lollywog]

i dont think they designed them with looking good in mind! We only had to wear the silly hat for our photographs fortunately! They are propper expensive to hire too if I recall rightly! Big fat waste of time and money for 10 seconds of glory! But I guess its nice to have all that hard work marked with a bit of tradition!