LIFE ADVICE PLEASE.
Hello world.
Not too much entirely is new.
I've sort of finally admitted to myself I am super depressed and have really severe codependency. I have very little confidence and I don't feel good about myself when I am alone. I've finally signed up for intake at a counselor so I hope I'll get the help I need. I also hope I don't need meds. I think I can do this. I hope. It's really turned me into a miserable mess at times. I have a hard time when I am alone and sometimes when I am out with friends too.
I've been having a rough time with school and stuff. Motivation to do school work is 0 and confidence in what I do is also 0. I know I'm not awful at designing, but I don't feel good. I think it's because a lot of the stuff I want to achieve I'd have to do through illustrator and we haven't exactly learned a lot in illustrator. This always happens to me. I'm never happy with the abilities I have, I want to do things that are way too complicated and beyond what I know so I get sad and fed up and usually give up. I may just stick to organizing text.
I've been offered this job at the SAIT Newspaper and I would be working for like.. super cheap. Like 5 bucks an hour. Seriously. But it's good experience and the professors would like me more for it. But I don't know what to dooo! I feel like declining the offer because I don't feel mentally stable enough to have such a big responsibility right now.. I don't know what to do. I'm stressing out so much and I have to go see them tomorrow! UGH.
On the bright side I have a huge crush on this super adorable girl that I met by chance on like NEXOPIA of all places. But she has like a direct line to my heart. At first I just thought she was pretty so I would flirt with her, but there was no way we'd have a chance together or anything. But now I am finding out she loves Star Wars, Avatar, Pokemon, Dungeons and Dragons. We even have the same favourite Pokemone. So like, what's a boy to do?
I don't know how to broach the FtM subject with her. It isn't just like.. Hey I want to fuck you, so if you turn me down because I am trans it isn't a big deal. I can go find someone else to fuck. I really like her. I am not really sure what to do.. When to talk about it. She's in Rocky Mountain House right now which is like 2 or 3 hours away, but she'll be visiting in April and I'm supposed to see her then. I want to wait to tell her in person, but I also don't want to be blamed for leading her on until then if she isn't okay with me being trans.
Advice please. On everything. I don't know what to do about life and school and everything.
Not too much entirely is new.
I've sort of finally admitted to myself I am super depressed and have really severe codependency. I have very little confidence and I don't feel good about myself when I am alone. I've finally signed up for intake at a counselor so I hope I'll get the help I need. I also hope I don't need meds. I think I can do this. I hope. It's really turned me into a miserable mess at times. I have a hard time when I am alone and sometimes when I am out with friends too.
I've been having a rough time with school and stuff. Motivation to do school work is 0 and confidence in what I do is also 0. I know I'm not awful at designing, but I don't feel good. I think it's because a lot of the stuff I want to achieve I'd have to do through illustrator and we haven't exactly learned a lot in illustrator. This always happens to me. I'm never happy with the abilities I have, I want to do things that are way too complicated and beyond what I know so I get sad and fed up and usually give up. I may just stick to organizing text.
I've been offered this job at the SAIT Newspaper and I would be working for like.. super cheap. Like 5 bucks an hour. Seriously. But it's good experience and the professors would like me more for it. But I don't know what to dooo! I feel like declining the offer because I don't feel mentally stable enough to have such a big responsibility right now.. I don't know what to do. I'm stressing out so much and I have to go see them tomorrow! UGH.
On the bright side I have a huge crush on this super adorable girl that I met by chance on like NEXOPIA of all places. But she has like a direct line to my heart. At first I just thought she was pretty so I would flirt with her, but there was no way we'd have a chance together or anything. But now I am finding out she loves Star Wars, Avatar, Pokemon, Dungeons and Dragons. We even have the same favourite Pokemone. So like, what's a boy to do?
I don't know how to broach the FtM subject with her. It isn't just like.. Hey I want to fuck you, so if you turn me down because I am trans it isn't a big deal. I can go find someone else to fuck. I really like her. I am not really sure what to do.. When to talk about it. She's in Rocky Mountain House right now which is like 2 or 3 hours away, but she'll be visiting in April and I'm supposed to see her then. I want to wait to tell her in person, but I also don't want to be blamed for leading her on until then if she isn't okay with me being trans.
Advice please. On everything. I don't know what to do about life and school and everything.