Year in review: fic meme
So I never did this last year, and it has basically been annoying me for a year. And I only wrote like… two or three fics in 2017, because one of them took me five months. So I’m gonna do two years at once! DEAL WITH IT.
Favourite story this year: Utter Cockslut (A Worthy Cause). Pretty damn sexy, if I do say so myself, and has lots of moments I like. Plus it’s kind of the culmination of What I Do in fandom, I think - like, it’s a pretty hardcore (and ridiculous) situation - Harry rents Draco’s arse to all comers for a night for charity - with Draco being pushed to his limits in terms of bondage, humiliation, and orgasm denial. But also it’s very fluffy and established-relationship, with dom!Harry being very careful of Draco and checking in with him and everyone being very in love. Also Ron/Draco/Harry is my porn OT3 and I love that I got that scene in, and the Ron/Pansy bit.
Best story this year: Resting With The Enemy - I might just think this because it’s hurt/comfort, which I love but rarely write, and there’s something deeply reassuring to me about a fic where everyone does their best and things improve. But I do think there are nice turns of phrase and it’s IC and funny, and it gets at certain things in Ron and Draco that I think are very much there but not often explored in fic, particularly Draco’s capacity for obsession.
Most embraced by the fandom: Aftershocks. No question - top for bookmarks, almost top for kudos, and apparently in the top 20 for hits on Harry/Draco fic in 2016? Which is literally insane.
Most underappreciated by the universe: I don’t know that I’d say any of my fic is underappreciated, but I do think Five-Card Stud suffers from not having any pairings that aren’t the rarest of rarepairs. I suspect if it had, say, Ron or Harry or even Neville helping grope and gang-bang Draco, it would’ve found more readers - and even as it is, I think probably plenty of people would enjoy the scenario but won’t stumble across it for lack of being in a big tag/comm/whatever.
Most fun story: Student Digs is silly, hopefully funny porn with Draco being a terrible snob and Harry spanking him and jokes about Ikea and London rent, i.e. super fun for me to write and hopefully fun to read.
Sexiest story: Ummm. I think either Utter Cockslut (A Worthy Cause) or Good Uncle, Bad Uncle (Except They’re All Dreadful) depending on if you want hardcore but ultimately loving slash kink (with a cute, brief het sex scene), or a manipulative, incestuous dub-con het threesome.
New fandom/pairing/genre/kink: As ever, there are too many to choose from! No new genres, but new pairings galore - Bill/Charlie/Lily Luna, Bill/Fleur/Draco, Fred/Draco/George, Sirius/Draco, Ron/Draco/Harry, Ron/Pansy, everybody/Draco twice… I’m gonna say Skanc Alley though, because it’s the first time I’ve done rentboy kink. Which is weird, cos I’ve read reams of rentboy fic. This is definitely rentboy kink though - no one in it is a sex worker, this is funny, fluffy Ron and Draco sharing a fantasy, and also dealing a bit with the class differences in their relationship.
Fandom/pairing/genre/kink you never thought you’d write: You Did Say Anything. Because it’s, er, well sometimes writing femmeslash kink when you’re a queer female writer feels a lot more exposing than boyslash.
"Holy crap, that's wrong even for you”: Oh man. You’ve Been Had is old-fashioned non-con with spanking; A Right And Proper Lay is manipulative dub-con with uncle/niece incest and blackmail; Patriarch is sixteen-year-old cousincest, although being British I’m more bothered by the power imbalance. You Did Say Anything is dub-con in that it’s dangerously under-negotiated, manipulative kink - teenage girls are dark as fuck. Good Uncle, Bad Uncle (Except They’re All Dreadful) is definitely fantasy-porn, but it’s also dub-con in that emotional manipulation way.
Five-Card Stud probably takes it, though. It’s intensely dark, and moreso for being more on the realistic end than the fantasy porn one; like, I didn’t even find it hot in the end, really? Plus I spent the whole time I was writing it going back and forth between ‘this is so OOC’ and ‘I mean, RL teenagers don’t even need war trauma to sexually humiliate each other.’
Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: To Do No Harm. At the very least it reflected new perceptions of the characters: Cursed Child’s characterisation definitely influenced it, particularly in making me confident enough in my understanding of Harry’s core damage being the Dursleys to make it the emotional climax.
Hardest story to write: To Do No Harm. No question. There was a deadline (which I totally failed to meet but I did try very hard) and pressure, and it was twice the size of the previous longest-fic-ever, and five times the size of the previous longest-H/D-fic ever. And mostly not porn. ALL VERY NEW TO ME.
Easiest story to write: Flare Up, which is fluffy Ron/Draco kink with a hint of hurt/comfort, and kink (in this case, waxplay post-Fiendfyre) as a way of dealing with trauma, and therefore entirely in my wheelhouse and comfortable to write. I like the dominant-bottom!Ron in this, too.
Biggest disappointment: At Her Beck and Call. I don’t think it’s bad, just… a bit uninspired, perhaps? Not everything a Fleur/Bill/Draco threesome with Bill fucking Draco for a voyeur!Fleur could be, at least, which is a shame because I don’t think the Floo is exploited to its fullest extent in Potter porn and I want to inspire imitators :D
Biggest surprise: In terms of other people’s reactions, the success of Aftershocks. In terms of mine, how memorable I’ve found Learn To Keep A Secret, this weeny little Pansy/Draco ficlet. It’s about Pansy and Draco having comfort sex in sixth year, and how she gets an abortion and doesn’t tell him. I find it memorable partly because writing even a tiny fic about getting an abortion being the escape/happy ending was very satisfying.
Story with single sweetest moment: I think maybe the bit where Ron and Draco talk it out in Five Times Ron and Draco Didn’t Had Sex (And One Time They Did):
Ron looked at him for a moment, head tilted as he tried to work out what to say. The silence seemed to tug the truth out of Draco in itself: he muttered, “it’s fine. I mean, I don’t want to talk about it.”
Ron nodded.
“Or think about it,” Draco added, words spilling out apparently despite his best instincts. “This is my first Christmas not with my parents, and it’s because Mum was worried about what’d happen if I went home. And Dad’s still - he’s not okay, and…” Draco’s voice went croaky.
Ron felt tenderness stab him, a physical ache. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Draco shrugged irritably, wrapping his arms round himself. Ron held himself back from another hug with difficulty. “I dunno. I mean I did.”
“I know, but I thought… you said it was fine,” said Ron, worried.
“Of course I did!” Draco said. “This is your first Christmas without your brother. This -- my wanting to go home to Mummy and Daddy really doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it matters!” Ron said, his voice rising.
“No! Look, I’m really, really trying not to be selfish, all right? I’m trying to learn, and to stop putting my family ahead of everyone else in the world as if they’re the o-only people who matter.”
“That doesn’t mean you don’t at least tell me when something hurts, you absolute nutter.” Ron seized Draco by the shoulders, peering into his face. Draco scowled, flinching from the close attention, and shoved his face into Ron’s chest. Ron let him hide.
The story that made you cry: Still never cried because of my own fic! But I think the saddest bit of any story was in To Do No Harm, when Draco and Harry see each other after a horrible Christmas spent apart. Harry gives Draco good news, news that should mean the conflict that’s had them fighting is over - but it’s deeper than this one example, and so instead of getting back together, they break up.
Story I want remembered: To Do No Harm. It is, among other things, an attempt to show how bruised Draco would be after the war without pretending that feeling guilty is redemption or that other people would just be being mean if they didn’t trust him. Which is something I feel like fandom could use.
.../unbearable dickhead
This was originally posted at https://lokifan.dreamwidth.org/370384.html. Comment wherever you like :)
Favourite story this year: Utter Cockslut (A Worthy Cause). Pretty damn sexy, if I do say so myself, and has lots of moments I like. Plus it’s kind of the culmination of What I Do in fandom, I think - like, it’s a pretty hardcore (and ridiculous) situation - Harry rents Draco’s arse to all comers for a night for charity - with Draco being pushed to his limits in terms of bondage, humiliation, and orgasm denial. But also it’s very fluffy and established-relationship, with dom!Harry being very careful of Draco and checking in with him and everyone being very in love. Also Ron/Draco/Harry is my porn OT3 and I love that I got that scene in, and the Ron/Pansy bit.
Best story this year: Resting With The Enemy - I might just think this because it’s hurt/comfort, which I love but rarely write, and there’s something deeply reassuring to me about a fic where everyone does their best and things improve. But I do think there are nice turns of phrase and it’s IC and funny, and it gets at certain things in Ron and Draco that I think are very much there but not often explored in fic, particularly Draco’s capacity for obsession.
Most embraced by the fandom: Aftershocks. No question - top for bookmarks, almost top for kudos, and apparently in the top 20 for hits on Harry/Draco fic in 2016? Which is literally insane.
Most underappreciated by the universe: I don’t know that I’d say any of my fic is underappreciated, but I do think Five-Card Stud suffers from not having any pairings that aren’t the rarest of rarepairs. I suspect if it had, say, Ron or Harry or even Neville helping grope and gang-bang Draco, it would’ve found more readers - and even as it is, I think probably plenty of people would enjoy the scenario but won’t stumble across it for lack of being in a big tag/comm/whatever.
Most fun story: Student Digs is silly, hopefully funny porn with Draco being a terrible snob and Harry spanking him and jokes about Ikea and London rent, i.e. super fun for me to write and hopefully fun to read.
Sexiest story: Ummm. I think either Utter Cockslut (A Worthy Cause) or Good Uncle, Bad Uncle (Except They’re All Dreadful) depending on if you want hardcore but ultimately loving slash kink (with a cute, brief het sex scene), or a manipulative, incestuous dub-con het threesome.
New fandom/pairing/genre/kink: As ever, there are too many to choose from! No new genres, but new pairings galore - Bill/Charlie/Lily Luna, Bill/Fleur/Draco, Fred/Draco/George, Sirius/Draco, Ron/Draco/Harry, Ron/Pansy, everybody/Draco twice… I’m gonna say Skanc Alley though, because it’s the first time I’ve done rentboy kink. Which is weird, cos I’ve read reams of rentboy fic. This is definitely rentboy kink though - no one in it is a sex worker, this is funny, fluffy Ron and Draco sharing a fantasy, and also dealing a bit with the class differences in their relationship.
Fandom/pairing/genre/kink you never thought you’d write: You Did Say Anything. Because it’s, er, well sometimes writing femmeslash kink when you’re a queer female writer feels a lot more exposing than boyslash.
"Holy crap, that's wrong even for you”: Oh man. You’ve Been Had is old-fashioned non-con with spanking; A Right And Proper Lay is manipulative dub-con with uncle/niece incest and blackmail; Patriarch is sixteen-year-old cousincest, although being British I’m more bothered by the power imbalance. You Did Say Anything is dub-con in that it’s dangerously under-negotiated, manipulative kink - teenage girls are dark as fuck. Good Uncle, Bad Uncle (Except They’re All Dreadful) is definitely fantasy-porn, but it’s also dub-con in that emotional manipulation way.
Five-Card Stud probably takes it, though. It’s intensely dark, and moreso for being more on the realistic end than the fantasy porn one; like, I didn’t even find it hot in the end, really? Plus I spent the whole time I was writing it going back and forth between ‘this is so OOC’ and ‘I mean, RL teenagers don’t even need war trauma to sexually humiliate each other.’
Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: To Do No Harm. At the very least it reflected new perceptions of the characters: Cursed Child’s characterisation definitely influenced it, particularly in making me confident enough in my understanding of Harry’s core damage being the Dursleys to make it the emotional climax.
Hardest story to write: To Do No Harm. No question. There was a deadline (which I totally failed to meet but I did try very hard) and pressure, and it was twice the size of the previous longest-fic-ever, and five times the size of the previous longest-H/D-fic ever. And mostly not porn. ALL VERY NEW TO ME.
Easiest story to write: Flare Up, which is fluffy Ron/Draco kink with a hint of hurt/comfort, and kink (in this case, waxplay post-Fiendfyre) as a way of dealing with trauma, and therefore entirely in my wheelhouse and comfortable to write. I like the dominant-bottom!Ron in this, too.
Biggest disappointment: At Her Beck and Call. I don’t think it’s bad, just… a bit uninspired, perhaps? Not everything a Fleur/Bill/Draco threesome with Bill fucking Draco for a voyeur!Fleur could be, at least, which is a shame because I don’t think the Floo is exploited to its fullest extent in Potter porn and I want to inspire imitators :D
Biggest surprise: In terms of other people’s reactions, the success of Aftershocks. In terms of mine, how memorable I’ve found Learn To Keep A Secret, this weeny little Pansy/Draco ficlet. It’s about Pansy and Draco having comfort sex in sixth year, and how she gets an abortion and doesn’t tell him. I find it memorable partly because writing even a tiny fic about getting an abortion being the escape/happy ending was very satisfying.
Story with single sweetest moment: I think maybe the bit where Ron and Draco talk it out in Five Times Ron and Draco Didn’t Had Sex (And One Time They Did):
Ron looked at him for a moment, head tilted as he tried to work out what to say. The silence seemed to tug the truth out of Draco in itself: he muttered, “it’s fine. I mean, I don’t want to talk about it.”
Ron nodded.
“Or think about it,” Draco added, words spilling out apparently despite his best instincts. “This is my first Christmas not with my parents, and it’s because Mum was worried about what’d happen if I went home. And Dad’s still - he’s not okay, and…” Draco’s voice went croaky.
Ron felt tenderness stab him, a physical ache. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Draco shrugged irritably, wrapping his arms round himself. Ron held himself back from another hug with difficulty. “I dunno. I mean I did.”
“I know, but I thought… you said it was fine,” said Ron, worried.
“Of course I did!” Draco said. “This is your first Christmas without your brother. This -- my wanting to go home to Mummy and Daddy really doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it matters!” Ron said, his voice rising.
“No! Look, I’m really, really trying not to be selfish, all right? I’m trying to learn, and to stop putting my family ahead of everyone else in the world as if they’re the o-only people who matter.”
“That doesn’t mean you don’t at least tell me when something hurts, you absolute nutter.” Ron seized Draco by the shoulders, peering into his face. Draco scowled, flinching from the close attention, and shoved his face into Ron’s chest. Ron let him hide.
The story that made you cry: Still never cried because of my own fic! But I think the saddest bit of any story was in To Do No Harm, when Draco and Harry see each other after a horrible Christmas spent apart. Harry gives Draco good news, news that should mean the conflict that’s had them fighting is over - but it’s deeper than this one example, and so instead of getting back together, they break up.
Story I want remembered: To Do No Harm. It is, among other things, an attempt to show how bruised Draco would be after the war without pretending that feeling guilty is redemption or that other people would just be being mean if they didn’t trust him. Which is something I feel like fandom could use.
.../unbearable dickhead
This was originally posted at https://lokifan.dreamwidth.org/370384.html. Comment wherever you like :)