(no subject)
mm, wow. so much happened. long post about the past few days, don't dig in unless you've got some time to spare.
So, I went to my friend paule's family get-together in Ocean City. I don't usually go to Ocean City, I usually go to AC or Margate, because...that's where my family goes. anyway, i drive down there with a half-box of cookies and a bag of cashews. i got kinda lost on the way, because i was incapable of reading my own directions properly. but i got there. they rented a three-story house. somewhere between six and ten bedrooms, i couldn't count, i think five or six bathrooms, plus two showers. two garages, porches on the top two stories and balconies on half the bedrooms, two full kitchens, and a really nice barbecue outside. it's actually two houses, one on top of the other. so there were about twenty people from two generations (except baby elizabeth, who i think was eighteen months and so sweet.) the generation paule belongs to ranged from five to thirty-six. i arrived at about one-thirty - the day was gross, rainy, everything. and everyone was just sitting around, chilling. paule is a wonderful girl, and she lives with her aunt and uncle currently because her mother was terrible when she was younger and is only now (about five years later) becoming a relatively normal person. so, i meet everyone, and it's a bit overwhelming. i can still only remember about fifteen names, many of which i already knew. anyway, the two days (it got extended because paule didn't want to go home) were spent on the boardwalk and the beach and at the house. we went to wildwood to visit old haunts, we played poker until 4am (i had three cosmos, because cousin julie is the resident bartender - i so had a crush on a thirty-six year-old married woman), and best of all, we all watched Kerry's acceptance speech together, and talked about it. last night, we made sushi and had the barbecue going too. i made sushi, i was so proud of myself. yes, it was with a mold. but shut up. and then i ate the sushi. quite a bit of it. all vegetarian (eww, what's wrong with me...i guess they don't usually put beef in seaweed, huh? well, i'll do it myself.), but i was happy. i was eating healthy. of course, i then ate a bunch of sharon's chocolate chip cookies, some funnel cake, and two hamburgers. but hey. it's a start. i was happy. anyway, i was made an honorary member of their family, which made me feel damn good. they're great people. by the end, i was walking around without paule, just hanging out with good folks. altogether very satisfying.
something that i don't think has come up with many of my friends is how i feel about the beach. i never liked to go there, because it was generally with my parents, and i was very body-shy around them, mostly my mom. but i went with the Rapaport clan, and you know what? i had some swim trunks and a tankini top, and i just told everything else to briefly fuck off. and i went to the beach, and i had a kickass time. i didn't realize how much i missed playing in the water. i also forgot that tanning on the beach is not like tanning at home, somehow. and i feel good, now, because i missed the beach. i didn't know it.
came home around three, showered, dressed (like a beach bum, whee!), and left again for town to go and see Alegria, the cirque du soleil show that's here. and i just need to say...wow. i felt like a kid. oohing at everything. i wanted to be part of that sound that circus crowds make, that gasp-cry at the moments of highest tension. very theatrical. but the performers...it was like seeing the Lord of the Rings. someone knows what i mean. it's like, your blood is just aroused by these feats. you find yourself clutching at armrests, flexing muscles, making phantom movements to encourage them. it's ecstatic. it makes you shiver, makes you ready for anything, as if at that moment you could and would get up there and do what they were doing, and feel fucking good. adrenaline rush, i suppose. but i'd like to go on thinking it's something else, thank you. got paid for the last week and a half, and now i'm here.
sleep, soon.
So, I went to my friend paule's family get-together in Ocean City. I don't usually go to Ocean City, I usually go to AC or Margate, because...that's where my family goes. anyway, i drive down there with a half-box of cookies and a bag of cashews. i got kinda lost on the way, because i was incapable of reading my own directions properly. but i got there. they rented a three-story house. somewhere between six and ten bedrooms, i couldn't count, i think five or six bathrooms, plus two showers. two garages, porches on the top two stories and balconies on half the bedrooms, two full kitchens, and a really nice barbecue outside. it's actually two houses, one on top of the other. so there were about twenty people from two generations (except baby elizabeth, who i think was eighteen months and so sweet.) the generation paule belongs to ranged from five to thirty-six. i arrived at about one-thirty - the day was gross, rainy, everything. and everyone was just sitting around, chilling. paule is a wonderful girl, and she lives with her aunt and uncle currently because her mother was terrible when she was younger and is only now (about five years later) becoming a relatively normal person. so, i meet everyone, and it's a bit overwhelming. i can still only remember about fifteen names, many of which i already knew. anyway, the two days (it got extended because paule didn't want to go home) were spent on the boardwalk and the beach and at the house. we went to wildwood to visit old haunts, we played poker until 4am (i had three cosmos, because cousin julie is the resident bartender - i so had a crush on a thirty-six year-old married woman), and best of all, we all watched Kerry's acceptance speech together, and talked about it. last night, we made sushi and had the barbecue going too. i made sushi, i was so proud of myself. yes, it was with a mold. but shut up. and then i ate the sushi. quite a bit of it. all vegetarian (eww, what's wrong with me...i guess they don't usually put beef in seaweed, huh? well, i'll do it myself.), but i was happy. i was eating healthy. of course, i then ate a bunch of sharon's chocolate chip cookies, some funnel cake, and two hamburgers. but hey. it's a start. i was happy. anyway, i was made an honorary member of their family, which made me feel damn good. they're great people. by the end, i was walking around without paule, just hanging out with good folks. altogether very satisfying.
something that i don't think has come up with many of my friends is how i feel about the beach. i never liked to go there, because it was generally with my parents, and i was very body-shy around them, mostly my mom. but i went with the Rapaport clan, and you know what? i had some swim trunks and a tankini top, and i just told everything else to briefly fuck off. and i went to the beach, and i had a kickass time. i didn't realize how much i missed playing in the water. i also forgot that tanning on the beach is not like tanning at home, somehow. and i feel good, now, because i missed the beach. i didn't know it.
came home around three, showered, dressed (like a beach bum, whee!), and left again for town to go and see Alegria, the cirque du soleil show that's here. and i just need to say...wow. i felt like a kid. oohing at everything. i wanted to be part of that sound that circus crowds make, that gasp-cry at the moments of highest tension. very theatrical. but the performers...it was like seeing the Lord of the Rings. someone knows what i mean. it's like, your blood is just aroused by these feats. you find yourself clutching at armrests, flexing muscles, making phantom movements to encourage them. it's ecstatic. it makes you shiver, makes you ready for anything, as if at that moment you could and would get up there and do what they were doing, and feel fucking good. adrenaline rush, i suppose. but i'd like to go on thinking it's something else, thank you. got paid for the last week and a half, and now i'm here.
sleep, soon.