monkey fight!!!!!
Yesterday Zane and I decided to go to the Bronx Zoo, the biggest and most awesome zoo within the five boros. We packed two sandwiches for each of us and made them with frozen bread so by the time we ate them, they would be the perfect temperature. Zane also packed five bottles of frozen water, again so that by the time we wanted to drink it, it'd be the perfect temperature. He also smartly packed a few plums between the frozen bread sandwiches and bottles of ice, as well as two small bags of Kettle Chips. If it's one thing that man is good at, it's packing. He can fit a lot of crap into a very small space. Somehow, whenever I pack any kind of bag and everything doesn't fit, he can re-pack it so there's room to spare. He is also excellent at making sandwiches. Mine are always sparse bread, fake meat, and mustard. The ones he made had all that, plus cheese and lettuce; they looked like the kind of sandwiches you'd buy in a store.
Anyway, we woke up crazy early around 9:30am so we would have enough time to maneuver around the entire zoo before they closed at 5:30pm. We got there around noon (the Bronx is the boro furthest from Brooklyn, so it was a long trip. Even Staten Island is closer!) and waited on a long line because for some reason they only had one cashier working on a Saturday afternoon. I left the navigation to Zane and he managed to lead us to every part of the park worth seeing (neither of us gave a shit about the butterfly garden or the birds). I was kind of pissed because it turned out that in order to see alot of the cooler animals (elephants and rhinos, specifically), you had to pay extra to ride the lame zoo monorail and even then, could only see them from the aforementioned monorail.
When we went to the baboon section, one of the baboons must have pissed off about five others because suddenly there was a huge fight! There was this really loud baboon screeching and the one baboon was running like crazy as the five others ran screaming after him. At one point, they ran right past the glass where I was standing. It was pretty awesome. This lady standing next to me was getting really into it, yelling "Get 'im! GET 'IM!!!". It was pretty funny. This was in the "Africa" section of the zoo, and during the monkey fight (which, by the way, had me yelling "MONKEY FIGHT!!! MONKEY FIGHT!!! excitedly for the next five minutes) this one guy said to his girlfriend "FUCK that, I ain't NEVER goin' to Africa!". Guess you had to be there...
In the tiger section, I was standing right next to the glass when the tiger walked by. He was inches away from me! It was awesome. Then there was almost a tiger fight, which was even cooler than the monkey fight. For that, I was only a few feet away. They just roared at each other aggressively for a minute or so before getting bored of it. The tigers were awesome. They kept peeing on trees and that shit was like a garden hose's worth of pee. They just aimed their rear ends at the tree and SPLASH!
We also got to see sea lion feeding time, when we decided that this one sea lion named Smokey was the Ginger of the Sea. He acted and moved just like Ginger! It was hilarious. He was so stubborn, and sometimes the zoo lady had to tell him three or four times before he'd do anything.
In the monkey house, there were these tiny brown monkeys with bright white moustaches that hung down about six inches. I really wanted to break the glass so I could reach in and tug on their little 'staches.
One of my favorite animals was called (I think) a giant snow rat. It was the hugest rat I've ever seen, and it's fur was all fluffy, long and white. Also lemurs, and every animal in the mouse house, especially blind mole rats. Usually the penguins are my favorite, but the Bronx Zoo's penguin exhibit was surprisingly lame.
Did I mention how fucking HOT it was yesterday? It must have been over a hundred degrees, with something like 90% humidity. It was awful! By the end of the day, I was so exhausted I couldn't even make it to the giraffes. I only got as far as the zebras. My head felt like my brain was boiling and I could barely move, not to mention I was absolutely drenched with sweat. At least we got to see a lot of baby animals: a snow leopard, flamingo, a few different baby monkeys, some other random baby birds, a black panther, and some others that I've forgotten.
All in all, we had an awesome day. We were both so glad we had those five bottles of icewater! Surprisingly, by the end of the day, some of the bottles still had some ice in them! Next week, I think we're going to try to go ice skating at Chelsea Piers. I'm pretty sure they have year-round indoor ice skating.
Anyway, we woke up crazy early around 9:30am so we would have enough time to maneuver around the entire zoo before they closed at 5:30pm. We got there around noon (the Bronx is the boro furthest from Brooklyn, so it was a long trip. Even Staten Island is closer!) and waited on a long line because for some reason they only had one cashier working on a Saturday afternoon. I left the navigation to Zane and he managed to lead us to every part of the park worth seeing (neither of us gave a shit about the butterfly garden or the birds). I was kind of pissed because it turned out that in order to see alot of the cooler animals (elephants and rhinos, specifically), you had to pay extra to ride the lame zoo monorail and even then, could only see them from the aforementioned monorail.
When we went to the baboon section, one of the baboons must have pissed off about five others because suddenly there was a huge fight! There was this really loud baboon screeching and the one baboon was running like crazy as the five others ran screaming after him. At one point, they ran right past the glass where I was standing. It was pretty awesome. This lady standing next to me was getting really into it, yelling "Get 'im! GET 'IM!!!". It was pretty funny. This was in the "Africa" section of the zoo, and during the monkey fight (which, by the way, had me yelling "MONKEY FIGHT!!! MONKEY FIGHT!!! excitedly for the next five minutes) this one guy said to his girlfriend "FUCK that, I ain't NEVER goin' to Africa!". Guess you had to be there...
In the tiger section, I was standing right next to the glass when the tiger walked by. He was inches away from me! It was awesome. Then there was almost a tiger fight, which was even cooler than the monkey fight. For that, I was only a few feet away. They just roared at each other aggressively for a minute or so before getting bored of it. The tigers were awesome. They kept peeing on trees and that shit was like a garden hose's worth of pee. They just aimed their rear ends at the tree and SPLASH!
We also got to see sea lion feeding time, when we decided that this one sea lion named Smokey was the Ginger of the Sea. He acted and moved just like Ginger! It was hilarious. He was so stubborn, and sometimes the zoo lady had to tell him three or four times before he'd do anything.
In the monkey house, there were these tiny brown monkeys with bright white moustaches that hung down about six inches. I really wanted to break the glass so I could reach in and tug on their little 'staches.
One of my favorite animals was called (I think) a giant snow rat. It was the hugest rat I've ever seen, and it's fur was all fluffy, long and white. Also lemurs, and every animal in the mouse house, especially blind mole rats. Usually the penguins are my favorite, but the Bronx Zoo's penguin exhibit was surprisingly lame.
Did I mention how fucking HOT it was yesterday? It must have been over a hundred degrees, with something like 90% humidity. It was awful! By the end of the day, I was so exhausted I couldn't even make it to the giraffes. I only got as far as the zebras. My head felt like my brain was boiling and I could barely move, not to mention I was absolutely drenched with sweat. At least we got to see a lot of baby animals: a snow leopard, flamingo, a few different baby monkeys, some other random baby birds, a black panther, and some others that I've forgotten.
All in all, we had an awesome day. We were both so glad we had those five bottles of icewater! Surprisingly, by the end of the day, some of the bottles still had some ice in them! Next week, I think we're going to try to go ice skating at Chelsea Piers. I'm pretty sure they have year-round indoor ice skating.