Like a fish in a bowl

[lizos_a_madman]

I've been feeling disconnected to everyone around me as of late. Its the saddest feeling for me to be in a room full of people, or a full coffee shop patio and feel like nobody really gives a shit. I suspect it may be me forgetting to take my meds the last two nights, in combination with my eating not really being on point, but having an idea of what's going on with my body doesn't really effect whats going on emotionally. Perhaps this is another pain period for me in my sobriety. I've said in the past that I've grown to not really care for the superficial relationships that I used to have with people. Now I'm in a position that I must accept that I have few friendships of substance. I'm trying to channel these feelings into the appropriate channels (thus the reason I'm LJing). Downtime alone, singing writing poetry, maybe even a bit of inventory and reading if I ever get around to it. If acceptance is the answer, maybe I have to accept that I'm always going to feel like I'm on the other side of a pane of glass with people. I know that my best friendships were forged over very long periods of time. I guess the action to be taken on my part is to learn to be open to new people, as well as cultivate the time I spend by myself.

My sister is back in the country. It's tuesday night now. She got here on Saturday and I haven't got my ass up to markham to spend some time with her. Tomorrow (that magical land where all productivity exists),